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Discover weekly, the best short stories

Looking for a steady supply of funny short stories? Every week thousands of writers submit stories to our writing contest.

150+ Funny Short Stories to read

Submitted by writers on Reedsy Prompts to our weekly writing contest. The world can get dreary and overwhelming, so when you’re looking to have a good laugh, take a scroll through our free collection of funny short stories.

Funny Short Stories – Page 10 of 10

Five Poached Quail Eggs

Submitted to Contest #333

Jester Dagonet was cartwheeling around in Little Plump Jo’s dreams again. Maybe she had eaten too much of that rich Christmas fare just before bedtime!“If you thought choc and cheese were sure to please And give you dreamings such as these” he sang“Wait, wait! Let me put a pawprint right there. You need a citation for that!” Now Intellectual Dabrowski, Little Plump Jo’s canine writing companion had also forced his way into the dream. He was insisting, as he always did, that Jo, in her position as Artisan in Residence at Malory Tennyson’s Cl...

14 likes 4 comments 4
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Do Aliens Eat Steak?

Submitted to Contest #333

“This is Rachel Robinette here at the White House where what I can only describe, Curtis, is a Flying Saucer that has landed on the south lawn? You can see there on the other side of the fencing that some sort of ramp has come down from the saucer and the doors to the White House have opened as well.” “Incredible Rachel, have you seen anything come out of the saucer yet? Any idea what the aliens look like?”“Not yet Curtis. No aliens have poked their heads out, but I’m sure that any moment now we will see our first signs of non-earth-based li...

11 likes 1 comment 1
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The Roast Run

Submitted to Contest #333

Oh no.Swirling the empty glass, I’m realizing I need to refill it. Which means I’ll have to get up off of my sister’s incredibly comfortable couch and cross her incredibly large house to the kitchen.That is also obscenely large.“Gwen,” I wine.“I need another glass of red and your kitchen is so far away!” She giggles and tips her own glass toward me, “you need to check the roast anyway. That thing is probably dry as the Sahara by now.”Good point.I stand- after a few tries and make my way down the hallway, admiring the framed pictures of our f...

9 likes 2 comments 2
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Cabbage

Submitted to Contest #333

Easy enough. Learn to cook. Make something edible. I got this. Despite my warnings to the contrary Phoenix thinks his pep talks will teach me how to cook. Like it’s some mental block in my head. Or I’m too lazy to dump a few things in a pan. Hopefully, after countless efforts to convince him otherwise, I went a bit too far last night. He was out of town to witness the aforementioned event that would occur. But the aftermath will forever leave its mark.Egg roll in a bowl. Sounds catchy. Follow that by a 3-ingredient Trader Joe’s magic recipe ...

14 likes 2 comments 2
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We Had a Good Time

Submitted to Contest #333

A few days after he left, I was sitting on my bed with my back against the wall, the room quiet in a way it hadn’t been while he was there. The radiator clicked on and off without committing to providing warmth. On my bedside table lay two museum tickets and a postcard I still hadn’t written. I picked up my phone the way you do when your mind gets too busy and scrolled without purpose. A notification appeared. Congratulations! Your review has been viewed 100 times. I laughed, then felt my face heat up. The review. I hadn’t thought about it ...

11 likes 0 comments 0
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Ransom

Submitted to Contest #333

It’s the phone call every parent hopes to never receive. “We have your daughter.” My wife began to panic, but I’ve seen Taken several times, so I was more prepared. I told her to book me a flight to Paris while I talk with the kidnapper. “Don’t you think we should probably hear their demands first before we make any plans?” she said. I’ve always appreciated how cool she can be under pressure, and there couldn’t have been much more pressure than what we were experiencing right then. I nodded in agreement, and in the most intimidating C...

8 likes 0 comments 0
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An Honest Review of the Worst Restaurant in the World (My Home)

Submitted to Contest #333

For years I have written reviews with the confidence of someone who believes they know what they’re doing.When I was asked to write one about an intimate restaurant, I reviewed the assignment carefully. The word intimate appeared twice in the email. In bold. I looked for options.None fully met the brief. So I chose the most appropriate one.An Honest Review of the Worst Restaurant in the World (My Home)Location: private residence.The glass is chosen well.The wine is poured slowly. The angle is correct. The pause as well. The waiter has repeat...

8 likes 1 comment 1
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Lunch, In Theory

Submitted to Contest #333

It was my retirement party, which sounds like a celebration of leisure, until you realize I spent the day doing the sort of unpaid labor usually reserved for wedding planners and the people who set up buffets at Hampton Inns. My husband wanted to throw it for me. He had the idea, and you could see how pleased he was with himself, as if he’d invented the concept of cake. I tried to decline, gently at first, then with the strained cheerfulness of someone saying no while simultaneously checking to see if anyone is about to cry. “Let me do this,...

15 likes 0 comments 0
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Bob's Kitchen Catastrophe

Submitted to Contest #333

Bob had a job which he took very seriously. His sole purpose in life was cooking lobsters. Obviously, there is more that goes into preparing a dish fit for a king, and Bob was up for the task. Bob clocked in at his normal time. He was never late for work, nor was he ever upset over the monotony of it all. The restaurant he worked at was in a bustling city which drew throngs of people who wanted to eat. And today was a Saturday, the busiest day of the week. Before the restaurant opened, there was much prep to be done. A giant pot had to be fi...

7 likes 1 comment 1
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dominatrix

Submitted to Contest #333

TW: Adult content and adult language. I’ve known Ted for less than a month, and he’s already putting me in one of his crazy BDSM fantasies. He says the words, please be my dominatrix, so casually, I inhale them like cocoa powder on tiramisu. It triggers a gag reflex, but I know he’d probably get off on it, so I smile instead. “You’re silly,” I say. I try to sound playful, as if a man old enough to be my grandfather asking me to dominate him sexually is totally normal. But I’m flustered. My skin’s gone all blotchy and red with heat. Suddenl...

8 likes 1 comment 1
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Apple Strudel

Submitted to Contest #333

Outside of the windows, Scod Driktax, watched the view change from a field of stars to blue skies as he shifted the Z56 Cruiser out of propulsion drive and into cruising speed. He activated the spaceship’s stealth mode, so no one on the planet below could see him. Mister Baaxer, Scod’s wealthy and eccentric employer, had sent him on another crazy assignment – go to Earth and acquire an apple strudel recipe. While listening to the Traveling Toota podcast, “Eating Your Way Through the Planetary System,” Mister Baaxer heard a review of the app...

7 likes 0 comments 0
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Baked Beans

Submitted to Contest #333

I was famished. I was so incredibly hungry that my stomach felt like it had been flipped inside out. My head hammered with pain as I hunched over the toilet for the third time that morning, retching my stomach out. I realized I needed to eat something or I might just waste away entirely. If I had known three months ago how difficult pregnancy would be, I wouldn’t have wanted to have this baby. Jaden, sweet husband of mine, knocked gently on the bathroom door when he heard me throwing up again. “Izzy?” He called, and e...

12 likes 1 comment 1
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The Perfect Menu

Submitted to Contest #333

The Perfect Menu Sunday, 5-25-25 I’m so excited. My first dinner party ever in my own apartment! I’ve put up my framed Chat Noir poster, and I’ll get some fresh flowers the guy sells down the street. I really want to impress my boss, Nancy, the food editor, and my co-workers, especially after I didn’t know what ganache was and pronounced jicama like jikama. Thank God my neighbor has a bigger table with matching chairs he’ll let me use. How I got the job as research assistant for Food & Wine magazine right out of Ohio State U I’ll never k...

16 likes 3 comments 3
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Coquito

Submitted to Contest #333

CW: Heavy alcohol use “... Blasted coquito...” I groan as I hold my head. Oh yes, I could already feel the effects of the damned Christmas drink.Despite the effects, abuelita knew how to make a killing coquito.Quite literary.“...owww...” I groaned as I sat up.One quick look around I realize I was at abuelita’s home back in Puerto Rico. Even though I was feeling groggy, I slowly remembered what happened.I arrived from New York back to Puerto Rico to celebrate Christmas with my family. You see, Puerto Rico has the longest Christmas celebration...

8 likes 0 comments 0
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Restaurant Review: The Event Horizon Bistro

Submitted to Contest #333

Restaurant Review: The Event Horizon Bistro⭐⭐☆☆☆(Two stars, generously rounded up because I survived.) I visited the Event Horizon Bistro last night after my navigation implant rerouted me due to a “localized time sneeze.” This happens more often than you would think, especially if you live within three miles of a university physics department or have angered a theoretical mathematician. When you wake up thirty minutes earlier than you went to sleep, you have two responsible options: call a physicist or order dinner. I chose dinner, largely ...

14 likes 0 comments 0
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RBE | Illustrated Short Stories | 2024-06

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