Howling at the Cabbage

Buster sat up in his bed. His ears stood to attention. Bacon smell drifted into the room and floated to his bed, and then up his nose. His tail jumped to life, thumping against his bed in a drum beat rhythm! “People in the food place.”

Buster jumped up and out of his bed and trotted towards the food place, the bacon smell guiding him along. He stopped at the sofa to sniff – no popcorn from last night on the floor. He licked the cushion, just to be sure, and then proceeded on, his nose held high.

The people were there, the one with long hair was putting stuff on the counter. Buster woofled the air – no dog treats or cheese. The short hair tall one was standing at the hot thingy moving really good smelling bacon around in a round food dish.

“Good morning, Buster! Are you hungry fella?” Buster cocked his head to one side, then the other. "How about some bacon?" Buster’s tail moved rapidly, he panted loudly. Buster woofed low - “Bacon”. “Just a moment fella, I’ll share some with you.”

The long hair one spoke. “He will weigh fifty pounds if you keep feeding him all that bacon.” As soon as the long hair one said ‘bacon’, Buster woofed twice “Yes. Bacon.”

“You see sweetie, he wants some bacon. It won’t hurt him. Besides, he likes it!” Buster barked again at the word 'bacon', and ran around the food place. He stopped by the long haired one, looked up, and froze.

A large green round rock sat on the counter. Buster cocked his head one way, then the other. His tail thumped against the kitchen cabinet. “Ball!” he howled. “Ball! Ball! Ball!”

“Buster! What are you howling about?” the long haired one asked.

"Ball! Ball! Ball!” Buster howled more.

“Sweetie! He thinks it’s a ball, I bet!” The short hair one took the large green round thing down from the counter. Buster howled. “Look Buster, this is cabbage, not your ball!” The short hair one laughed, and then held the cabbage down to Buster for him to smell.

Buster sniffed the ‘ball’, and then snorted the stinky smell out of his nose.

“I guess he doesn’t like cabbage honey!” Buster snorted again. “But he does like bacon.” Buster woofed again. The short hair one took a long piece of bacon from the hot round thing and waved it in the air. “It’s cool now, Buster. Here ya go!”

Buster stood up on his hind legs and snapped up the bacon. “Hey! Watch my fingers!” Buster sat on his haunches and gobbled down his treat.

“So, this cabbage will be nice for sauteed bacon and cabbage with port roast tonight.” The short hair one put it back on the kitchen counter. He looked down at Buster. “Should I cook your ‘ball’?” The short hair one laughed. “It will probably taste very good, eh Buster?”

Buster woofed in reply and licked the cabinet.

“Buster licks everything!” the long hair one said.

“Yes, honey, he is a dog.” The short hair one reached down and petted Buster between his ears. “You are a good boy, aren’t you, Buster?”

Buster woofed in reply, wagging his tail and spinning in circles.

“I think Buster needs to go O-U-T.” the short hair one spelled.

“Do you really think he knows the word ‘out’?” the long hair one asked.

Buster immediately began spinning around faster and faster. He barked and barked. ‘Out!’ ‘Out!’

“That answers that, sweetheart.” The short hair one laughed. “He knows that word!”

The short hair one opened the patio door. “C’Mon, Buster, Let's get you outside! "

Buster pranced to the door.

"He's happy with himself." the long hair one commented.

"Yep, he is." the short hair one replied. "He truly is a Buster for sure!” Buster pranced

through the patio door and out into the back yard. He snuffled the grass here and there, rolled around in it there, scratched a patch in the middle of the yard, and then did his business by the

barberry hedge. He scratched the grass, both legs, sending tufts of grass sailing through

the air. He then pranced his way to the patio door, and woofed." Be right there, your royal

highness." the short hair one commented.

Buster woofed once more and sat on his haunches. The short hair one opened the door. Buster pranced in, and the short hair one stepped into the kitchen and closed the door behind him.

Buster circled the kitchen once more, stopping to lick the bottom of the stove. He paused mid-step and saw the big green ‘ball’ on the kitchen counter. He barked and then howled, and then barked ‘Ball, Ball, Ball’ again and again.

The short hair one picked up the cabbage once more, and held it down for Buster to smell.

“Don’t let him lick it!” the long hair one said.

“I’ll tear off the outside leaves anyway before it is cooked.” the short hair one replied.

Buster sniffed the ‘ball’, and then snorted, and then sneezed the smell out of his nose.

“Ew! Wash that off right now!” the long hair one said. “How is it he knows the word O-U-T, but cannot remember that the cabbage is not a B-A-L-L?” The long hair one stopped. “And now you have me doing it!”

“One of life’s great mysteries, I guess.” The short hair one laughed. You see, Buster, it is not a ‘ball’. the short hair one said as he washed Buster’s sneeze off of it. “This is a cabbage, not a ball, and it will taste delicious when it is cooked.”

Buster woofed one more for good measure, walked by the stove, and licked it in passing, and then pranced his way out of the kitchen.

“That dog is just too much!” the long hair one commented.

“Yes, he is, honey.” the short hair one replied, “and you love him very much!”

Buster woofed once more on his way to his bed.

“And he always has to have the last word!” the long hair one added.