The Candlelit Soul

Horror Historical Fiction

This story contains themes or mentions of physical violence, gore, or abuse.

Written in response to: "Write a story about a fear that turns out to be justified — or entirely imagined." as part of What Keeps You Up at Night.

Rodia placed a cup of warm tonic before her, then measured a small spoonful of bromide powder into it and stirred. He watched the liquid swirl clockwise, until it dissolved completely.

“This tonic will numb the dread and loosen your tongue.”

The candle between them began to dwindle while the last of the evening light crept through the dusty window, mingling with the candle’s soft orange glow. Together, the two lights barely held back the shadows gathering in the barren wooden room. There they sat around an old table.

“I can’t…” she said, shaking her head, fighting back the disgust of conjuring up the memory. Her eyelids were swollen from days of weeping since that morning, and still, the tears sat ready behind her eyes. Her hands trembled as she seemed unsure where to put them.

Rodia slipped two fingers into his waistcoat pocket and drew out his silver pocket watch.

“It will take two minutes before you start to feel it. Close your eyes, and when I tell you to begin, tell me what you see,” Rodia said gently.

A worn leather satchel lay open on the wooden table, filled with charcoal and pencils. Beside it lay a blank sheet of paper. Rodia watched her swallow air, trying to steady the involuntary heaving of her shoulders.

At the top of the page, he wrote:

October 29, 1894

Village of Verkhnyaya Kolva

Summoned by the Administration of Krasnokamsk.

Rodia glanced at his pocket watch. “Two minutes have passed.”

“Sveta… my charcoal and pencils will capture your every word. Just close your eyes. Let your mind walk back to that moment, everything you see, hear, feel. No detail is unimportant.”

He studied her face; the slight sway of her head told him the mixture had taken hold. Her hands, restless moments ago, were now still, gripping the table.

“And his face,” Rodia said softly. “I know that will be the hardest part. Look hard. Look deep.” Her face went pale. Her eyes seemed to say that too much was being asked of her. She breathed in, then out.

“Close your eyes, Sveta…” Rodia reminded her.

Silence settled over the room. The only sounds were the wind outside and the old wooden izba shifting as if it were still settling into the earth.

“My first question is the easiest: what was the address where this took place?”

“45B Gogolov,” Sveta whispered.

“Walk me through the day,” he said.

“It was early morning…” Sveta said. “The light had just climbed over the earth. I was walking my normal route, going home. I had two buckets of water on my koromyslo, drawn from the well along the road.”

Rodia sat listening, his hands still, his pencil poised above the paper.

“The ground…was wet with morning dew. The hem of my dress became soaked on the grass…” She stopped. “This is nonsense. What am I saying?” She wiped tears that had involuntarily made its way down her cheek.

Rodia handed her a white handkerchief, and said “Here... take a little more tonic, if you need it.”

“No… I am okay, my head feels light.” She sighed.

Steadying herself with her arms on her chair, she continued, “The sky burned orange. We always said a red morning sky was a bad omen. I walked into the house. It was quiet. I thought nothing of it. I poured the water into the barrels and hung the yoke outside. The quiet was unnatural… Come to think of it, I had never once heard the floorboards, but that morning they announced my every step.

“The hair on my arms began to stand. I could feel something… wrong. A presence that wasn’t right.”

She clutched her chest for a moment hugging herself tightly.

“The hallway was dark, just the morning glow. And in the corner of my eye, in my brother’s room, I saw a man.”

Rodia’s pencil touched the page.

“His hair was matted. A tangle of gray and brown… mostly brown. Curled and wild, as if he had worn a cap for too long.”

Rodia’s fingers began to move, the charcoal whispering across the page.

“Stay at this moment,” he said. “Keep it still as a day… see it as you would a portrait.”

“There was a nervous excitement about him, as if he wasn’t moving but shaking all over. His lips were moving, saying something yet nothing at all. His face was pale and gaunt, his eyes blue, with eyelashes ladies like us would only dream of—his one redeeming feature.”

She shook her head in disappointment, as if tasting something bitter.

“There is something I left out….”

“What? What did you leave out?” Rodia asked.

Her face showed her revulsion.

“He was on all fours.”

Rodia looked up, saying, “On all fours?”

“Yes, he was crawling across the floor like an animal. His fingers were thin and dirty, his palms black with something. I didn’t understand what he was doing… the blood…”

She closed her eyes tighter, shaking her head as if hating the memory. They sat in silence as her head swayed back and forth.

“Then I saw the flies.”

Rodia’s pencil paused.

“They were everywhere. On the floor. Dead. Hundreds of them. Buzzing even towards me. And he was picking them up.”

She placed her hands over her mouth, then held one hand up, as if picking something invisible off the table.

“One at a time.”

“What was he doing with them?” Rodia asked.

Sveta mimed what she was about to reveal, then faintly whispered.

“He was… he was eating them.”

The charcoal snapped in Rodia’s fingers and he looked up astonished.

“He would pick up a dead fly between his fingers, put it in his mouth, chew it… then reach for another. There was an unsavory smell of unwashed skin. His beard gave him a truly feral appearance, as if he had walked straight out of Preobrazhenskaya Psychiatric Hospital.” Her eyes remained closed, her face grimacing at the memory.

“Describe the beard,” Rodia said glad to be back on track.

The pencil scratched against the paper.

“It was long around his chin, wavy and black with some gray. But there was something unwholesome about it. Patchy. Like wild weeds in places, then balding to nothing but sallow skin in others.”

“Hold still,” Rodia said. “Look into that face… what did you see?”

“In his hands… a knife. Something was dripping from it…”

Her shoulders began to shake again.

“Don’t look at the knife,” Rodia said quietly. “Move your eyes from it. Go directly to his face. Only his face. Tell me what his eyes were like.”

“They were angry, with a laughter of mockery within them. No mercy. I saw more humanity in feral cats. Also… seemed like a web of red lines were around his blue eyes.” She adjusted her head-scarf, and one leg started bouncing with nervous energy.

“They were not symmetrical… one larger than the other, sitting slightly lower, as though his face had been pulled crooked. His forehead was broad, deeply lined, making his eyes look sunken. His nose was thin, nothing defining. And his lips kept moving…”

She opened her eyes. “But now he was speaking.”

The tallow candle almost died. Rodia immediately reached into his satchel, took out several more candles, and lit them one by one, placing them around the table. The room brightened with that orange glow. Sveta closed her eyes again, moving her head back and forth slowly, in deep thought, still under the influence of the tonic.

“Now,” he said, returning his pencil to the page. “Tell me what he said.”

“Not really talk… I misspoke… he began to sing, at first,” Sveta said, looking as if she were about to open her eyes.

“Keep your eyes shut,” Rodia reminded her.

Her closed eyes clamped even tighter. Her face twisted into a scowl.

“He was singing in riddles.”

“Singing?” Rodia asked, unintentionally.

“Yes… It rhymed—something about catching spirits and flies and the taste of earth.”

Her lips trembled and she began to hum the tune.

“I began to back away when he smiled… flies buzzed around me.”

Rodia looked up from his portrait as sweat began to bead on his forehead, and for the first time his palms felt wet as he started shading again with charcoal.

“His face—back to that, please,” Rodia asked.

“His face was shrunken… as if his bones were trying to push through his skin... the look you get from starvation… I’d seen that look before. And one mole on the bottom lip.” She pointed where it was on her face.

“His teeth were mostly rotten or missing, making his lips sag a bit… but I started to back away down the hall. My brother… he was not moving. On the floor, face down.”

"My brother..." Her voice cracked. "My sweet younger brother..." She whispered... "was born in that very room."

Her shoulders began to heave once again, and she rocked back and forth slowly on the chair with her hands covering her face.

Rodia looked up and discerned that her emotions were beginning to rise hotter than the tonic. She removed her hands, then opened her eyes and looked directly at him.

“He sang a familiar tune, of all things… Not correctly, but over and over… ‘Take pity, oh my dear soul, on this young lad’s dear shoulder.’ And then he stood up. He had a knife in his hand.”

“What then?” Rodia asked.

“I ran.”

Rodia kept drawing, asking a few more questions as she supplied details about the man’s face and build. After what could have been an hour, he finally stopped.

“I am done. Can you tell me if this is him?” It was already almost dark, so Rodia positioned the candles to illuminate the paper.

Sveta jumped up and held her mouth as if in horror. “You make their souls appear as they truly are on paper… That… that is him.”

Rodia, taking her reaction as confirmation, said, “You confirm this? Look at his face carefully. Anything missing? Think hard.”

She glanced once again at the portrait. “Yes, that is him. His soul is tethered to that paper.” Sveta looked away, covering her eyes.

“Sign this portrait with your name—it’s for the magistrate. I will need to talk to one other who might have been a witness to this event, your neighbor.”

“Yes, babushka Maria. 52A Gogolov Street.” Sveta wiped at her eyes. “She lives alone, since her husband passed. She might have seen something.”

He handed her the pencil, and Sveta looked at the picture, then turned her face away as she signed it. Rodia placed the paper into his satchel.

“It will take two weeks. You will be contacted if we learn anything. I am sorry for your loss.” Rodia bowed politely, and before he departed, he stopped at the doorframe and glanced back at Sveta. She was staring at the candles with a blank expression on her face.

He had drawn the faces of murderers, people who had done things far worse than what Sveta was describing, but something in her voice, the tremble and inflection, the fear within her, made his own stomach churn. He wondered what this work was slowly making of him.

“Do you need help getting home?”

“No…” Sveta said absently. Then she turned toward him. “Do you believe in demons?”

Rodia studied her for a moment. Her blue eyes still looked soft in the orange glow of the candlelight.

“I am inclined to, at times, based on what I have seen in my work. Sometimes… it’s just insanity.”

He reached for the door, then stopped.

“Is there anything else you wish to tell me, ma’am?”

"Just to see that portrait one more time." Sveta clutched a cross around her neck and then turned back to looking at the candle.

"To make sure... indeed it is him."

Rodia hesitated, then placed it on the table once more.

Sveta didn't reach for it right away. She only looked, much longer than she had the first time, her eyes drifting slowly over the face as if discerning something written beneath the charcoal. She traced her finger along the portrait's face. Then, gradually, her eyebrows drew upward into a V, and she began to sway, as if she'd had more tonic.

"Are you all right?" Rodia asked. "Let me walk you home tonight."

Rodia watched her as she pushed the portrait toward him.

"You want to hear what he sang?"

"If it would make you feel better..."

Six little flies came riding on the Eastern wind,

Six little mouths opened wide,

The swine ran squealing toward the big blue sea,

And something little swam inside of me.

She looked up at Rodia, fighting back something, a struggle showing on her face.

"I told you about the silence, the presence, the flies..." She closed her eyes once again, grimacing.

He looked at the table. The candlelight made the drawn figure seem almost to move. He told himself it was only the flame. Her face had gone terribly still and stern.

"I forgot to mention—they flew inside of me as well."

He stood in silence, the sound of the evening wind hitting the izba.

"What do you mean, Sveta?" Rodia asked.

She didn't answer. She stood, taking her head-scarf off and placing it on the table. Her long black hair frizzed around her face.

Rodia stepped back. She began to hum the same tune as before, then blew out the candles, one by one.

Posted Sep 11, 2026
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71 likes 99 comments

Daisy Rubyns
September 28, 2026 23:16

This story definitely fits the 'creepy' label. I like how you took the reader through ever increasing details about the strange murderer, and then the ending was vague enough to allow the reader to use their imagination as to what happens next.
I am wondering, in the Bible it talks about demons going into swine who then ran down the hill into the sea and perished as a result of Jesus casting them out of men. Your song in the end reminded me of that. Is that just a coincidence or did you do that on purpose?

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The Old Izbushka
September 29, 2026 00:58

Im glad this story worked for you! I was hoping the breadcrumbing of details and the vague ending would leave room for multiple interpretations. You have a keen eye regarding the poem. It was indeed a subtle reference to the demoniac and demons that went into the swine and ran into the sea. I was hoping that readers who picked up on it would get an extra layer of unease from the imagery and give the story another "creepy" sicker. :).
Thanks so much for the thoughtful read and comment!!

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David Sweet
September 28, 2026 22:39

As usual, you have created something unique and wonderful, in this case, wonderfully horrifying! This Baal-zebub kind of demonic character is horrid. I also love the setting and time period. Well done. The tale unfolds so well to that spectacular ending. I appreciate reading each of your stories as it always teaches me something.

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The Old Izbushka
September 29, 2026 00:41

Thank you so much!! Yeah... this was a horrifying story, but it was actually a lot of fun to write!! Glad it was "wonderfully horrifying." :) I'm currently working on a Baba Yaga story that I'm hoping will eventually find the right prompt and be released into the wild.
And thank you again for the recommendation about that other writing contest. I'm sending a story in! I'm not sure it's my very best work, but there's always next month if thT one doesn't make the cut. The important thing is giving it a try. Thanks again for the encouragement, and support. It means a lot!

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David Sweet
September 29, 2026 01:43

You're most welcome!

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Eliza Stroud
September 25, 2026 19:59

This was amazing! I really enjoyed the creepy atmosphere here! The candlelight and Sveta’s increasingly disturbing memories create such strong tension. And the ending with the flies is particularly unsettling and leaves a lovely little chill that makes me want to read more! But I think my favourite part has to be the description of the man on all fours and the flies surrounding him; it's such a vivid and fear-inducing detail that made my blood run cold, as though I was seeing him myself. Yet another fantastic story! :)

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The Old Izbushka
September 26, 2026 03:03

Thank you so much for taking the time to read!! I'm oddly pleased that the image of the man on all fours surrounded by flies stuck with you, even if it is a rather horrifying mental picture! :) That was the moment where I hoped the story would tip from strange into even stranger. And I'm glad the ending left a little chill behind. I went through several versions before finding one that felt right, so it's wonderful to hear that it landed for you. Thanks again for the great encouragement!

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Alex Merola
September 25, 2026 17:11

Ol' Izbu, I enjoy your style of writing. It flows easily throughout. You always manage to use the right dialogue in the right place-no melodrama. Thanks again for a great read.

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The Old Izbushka
September 25, 2026 18:24

Thanks Alex!! I really appreciate your encouragement and always look forward to your comments.

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Erian Lin Grant
September 24, 2026 21:03

Dear The Old Izbushka,
Thank you for sharing this. Horror is not really my genre, so while reading I found myself paying more attention to the writing than to the horror itself. I really liked the atmosphere and the vivid imagery. In some moments, the mood even reminded me a little of Edgar Allan Poe. Some scenes are especially striking. Thank you again.

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The Old Izbushka
September 24, 2026 22:25

Hi Erian, Horror isn't really my genre either :) I do not mind it, just do not normally write or read it much. Though I don't mind exploring darker themes from time to time. Thank you for taking a chance on a story that isn't usually your cup of tea and giving it such a thoughtful read. I really appreciate it!! Thanks again for reading, and I'm so glad the atmosphere and imagery resonated with you. The comparison to Poe was especially kind!

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Aaron Luke
September 20, 2026 16:50

T.O.I !!!!!!!
Wow, I am so glad I got to read one of your stories again. I see this is the one you told me you tried continuing. I won't lie, the other one was months ago that I just had to check what comment I wrote to re ignite my memory. I loved how eerie and horror like it was. The Russian terms and themes placed within and the silent horror going over. Sveta's fear felt real as she was describing the process but I cannot tell whether in the end if she was possessed. Or maybe it was by her own instinct she didn't want anyone closer to her brother. The end was what blew me away the most. How the headscarf fell and the flies buzzed about, ready to attack. I can only hope that Rodia can only survive this encounter so that we can hear more stories from him. Thank you for sharing.

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The Old Izbushka
September 20, 2026 18:20

Thank you!! I definitely wouldn't expect anyone to remember a story from several months ago, so glad you checked it out... I just found myself wanting to write another story about Rodia, even though I had no clear direction for the ending when I started. I'm so glad it worked for you! I love that you picked up on the ambiguity surrounding Sveta. Whether what happened was supernatural, psychological, or something else , I wanted to leave a little room for the reader to wonder. And yes... I hope Rodia escapes too! I'd love to take him on another adventure one of these days. If it was me.... I would have ran right when she started singing.

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Cynthia Maynard
September 17, 2026 22:45

Yikes! Creepy! Great job!

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The Old Izbushka
September 17, 2026 22:54

Thank you for reading and taking the time to read my creepy story 😃. Appreciate the encouragement !

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Andrew Putnick
September 17, 2026 20:20

Ooooo this one was spooky. And that twist at the end! As always marvelously full characters. The atmosphere is perfect, you know exactly where to place your setting for maximum effect. The environment is real and I’m willing to bet if we were in Russia you could show me a place that resembles every scene. This leaves you free to really focus on the emotion and interactions. Wonderfully done.

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The Old Izbushka
September 17, 2026 22:53

I’m glad the setting, characters, and all the interactions worked for you! I guess this is my first Russian X-Files. 😂

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Marjolein Greebe
September 12, 2026 14:58

This had a wonderfully unsettling atmosphere, Iz. I especially liked the way the portrait slowly takes shape through Sveta’s memory. It makes the scene feel almost forensic at first, but the further she goes, the more that sense of rational observation starts slipping away. The flies were probably the detail that stayed with me most — grotesque enough on their own, but much more disturbing once the song and that final revelation bring them back in a completely different way.

I also liked that Rodia never quite becomes a passive listener. His insistence on returning to the face gives the scene structure, while Sveta keeps pulling it toward something stranger and less controllable. By the end, I wasn’t entirely sure whether I should trust what she remembered, what the tonic may have altered, or whether there really is something supernatural happening — which, for me, made the ending work even better.

That last image of her blowing out the candles is deliciously creepy.

I’m curious: when you wrote Sveta, did you already know exactly what had happened to her, or did the darker implication at the end emerge while you were writing?

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The Old Izbushka
September 12, 2026 15:22

Thank you for thinking this was 'deliciously creepy' Originally, the story was completely different: Rodia investigated and discovered that the suspect’s mother had locked her son in a basement because of his mental illness, occasionally letting him out “to play.” She was forgetful, so he might have escaped. I scrapped that version because shifting from Sveta’s dread to Rodia’s objectivity made the story feel too sprawling... more like a novel than a short story. Into the digital shredder it went!!

Instead, I leaned into a darker idea: what if Sveta swallowed the flies? That twist felt more unsettling and kept the focus on her trauma and expereince. So in answer to your question...I had no idea until today!!

I really appreciate your thoughtful insight and review!!! It means a lot. And if you get the chance, I know you get this but would you mind giving the story a like :) Again really appreciate your comment !!

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Akihiro Moroto
September 11, 2026 21:07

Wow, this was so haunting. Things are not always how they seem. Another heart-pounding adventure for Rodia. Thank you for sharing, Old Izbushka!

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The Old Izbushka
September 12, 2026 00:20

Thanks!! I ended up changing the ending completely. The first half felt strongest to me, while the second half read more like a separate piece... almost like “part one and part two.” To keep the focus tight, I decided to cut the entire latter section that honestly barely squeezed under 3k words.! I may be wrong, and if you have time, do you think this leaner version is better? :)

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Akihiro Moroto
September 12, 2026 12:58

Agreed! 3K words is hard to compress so many details. This update focuses more on Rodia's session with Sveta, whereas the original also had the aftermath on Gogolov Street. I loved the original ending as a cliffhanger, though it may come across as a bit rushed because of the word count.

This update builds on the trauma that Sveta experienced. Perhaps express more of the mental overwhelm Sveta goes through while reliving the tragedy. Make the fear palpable. I love the singing at the end and the fly.

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The Old Izbushka
September 12, 2026 13:40

Thank you so much!! I have made a few adjustments as. you suggested, now that I have much more room to work! :)

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Akihiro Moroto
September 12, 2026 15:21

Love it!

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Richard Fahy
September 13, 2026 03:41

Mr. Iz, I'd like to thank you for this reply. For me, THIS is the kind of thing that helps me see how others work through the creative process. I think a "behind the scenes" peek can be really illuminating, and illumination, that light, just might help me write better.

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The Old Izbushka
September 14, 2026 19:31

I’m so glad you liked it! I really appreciate the constructive feedback it truly helps me grow as a writer. Hearing thoughtful reactions like yours makes the process feel worthwhile and keeps me motivated to keep refining my work. This was actually the first story where I completely scrapped the original ending :)

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Carrie #1
September 30, 2026 16:15

Creepy. Well written, the pace and suspense kept me on edge. Plot twist at ending was spooky.

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The Old Izbushka
September 30, 2026 17:11

Thank you so much!! I am very please this story worked for you!!

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David Poslad
September 30, 2026 14:08

Hi, the way you work with atmosphere in that one is so well done. It sets the whole mood. From the beginning on there was this interesting tonic, making me doubt everything in this story. So, who to believe? I liked the ending you chose, the tune giving away enough of Sveta's perception while not revealing too much. Very interesting. Thanks for sharing

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The Old Izbushka
September 30, 2026 17:16

Thanks!! I'm really glad this story worked for you and kept you guessing. The tonic was meant to make readers question what could be trusted, and remedies like that were often used in those days, so I liked filtering everything through Sveta's memory while she was under its effects. I was hoping the ending would leave room for multiple interpretations, so I'm happy it landed that way for you. Thank you so much for the thoughtful read and comment. :).

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Sarah Parker
September 26, 2026 04:30

Masterful storytelling. Creepy tales are not my favorite genre, but your writing is full of such artistry.

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The Old Izbushka
September 26, 2026 12:10

Thanks!! Creepy tales actually aren't really my genre either I was just trying something new. I think this is the only one I have that's really trying to be scary. Thanks for reading!!

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Unknown User
September 12, 2026 21:27

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The Old Izbushka
September 13, 2026 11:29

Wow!! I really appreciate your encouragement! I was hoping that opening scene would be intriguing enough to keep people reading . I actually wrote most of this story several weeks ago, but it didn’t match the prompt at the time. When the Prompt title “What keeps you up at night” appeared, I thought, well… seeing that man in a darkened room would definitely keep me up! So happy the story worked for you. !! . :)

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