Just a game of Sudoku

I fear that I am very well doomed right now. And so is the entire world, apparently, if I understood correctly. I might have not. I really do hope that’s the case.

“So? How do you answer?”, one of the creatures, well, Mr. Conroy I guess, asked me. I, still sprawled on the floor and frankly growing terrified by the minute, could only croak back a terrified, “yes?”

There were four others in the room with us as well, and they all looked at each other with excitement after my answer. “Come along then”, one who looked exactly like one of my other neighbours, Ms. Field, said while offering her hand to help me up. It was as cold to the touch as a sheet of ice. All five started walking along the long corridor.

Following after them, I quickly went through what I knew. Thus far, this is what has happened. I was casually lounging in my back yard when quite suddenly, I wasn’t anymore. I closed my eyes while feeling the wind rustling my hair gently, the warm sun lulling me to sleep and a few birds singing somewhere all around. Then suddenly, and I am not joking, I started to levitate and go higher. It went exactly as all the cartoons and children’s shows had depicted cows being taken, a beam of light and all of a sudden I’m going up somewhere that wasn’t there a minute ago. There was no sound, not really even anything you could feel, and the whole process only seemed to take a few seconds. Next, I’m surrounded by people who all look like my neighbours but also don’t feel like anything human at all. Cold to the touch, twice as big and moving oddly carefully, as if they didn’t know which way to be.

“Wait here”, one of my neighbours said as we stopped, all of them going inside and leaving me to stew on whatever was coming next. I knew roughly what was coming, but what the hell could I even do with that knowledge? I was to play Sudoku. Yes, that was the game to be played and that’s why, apparently, I am here. To put it plainly, and in the only way they told me; they want to take over our world, but wish to play a game for it, since, in their words, they’re not taking over planets because they necessarily need to, but because they’re bored. The game entertains them and also lets them know if the planet is worth being left alone. They looked into the kinds of games we have here and someone, probably their version of a nerd, decided they wanted to challenge the world’s best Sudoku player to play against them, which, frankly, I’d like to tell them isn’t even really a game but more so a puzzle, but I assume they wouldn’t take kindly to that. Also, I’m scared they would change the game into something I definitely know nothing of. At least I know how to fill the easy Sudokus, which leads me to also conclude that they definitely have the wrong person. They had asked if my name was Alex Stone, which it is, but since I know next to nothing of the puzzle, and I’m definitely not the world’s best in anything, I assume they only had a name and not a face and that’s why they picked me, which, of course, is just perfect. I had also been kindly informed that we are playing for the earth and that I could say no, but then it would mean that I automatically lose and lead to the destruction of everything, which, in my humble opinion, further helps to create the condition of this being just absolutely perfect.

I kind of just want to joke my way through this. Either think this is just a dream or that it doesn’t really matter if the world ends because of me. I mean, we’ve had a good run, right? Maybe the earth needs a little peace and quiet. But then, they’re not human but they look like my neighbours, only they are like double the size and are ice cold, and the world isn’t really all that bad, and all the animals and fish and insects wouldn’t know why it’s all suddenly ending, and I really want to cry and maybe pee my pants a little. Maybe I should jump right off? But I also have not even seen a single window and I’m not going to win at Sudoku against some nerd from another planet.

Then finally, the door opened and Ms. Field came back and smiled, and motioned me to go inside. In those few minutes I waited to be let in, I somehow thought I’d be stepping into some grand room with hundreds of these creatures and a table set in the middle where the action happened. Sort of what I now assume the real-life Sudoku matches look like. Instead, the room looked like any other break room. A counter full of normal looking bowls and mugs, a sink, a small fridge, and a window, from which I could see we were still hovering over my house, with a small table next to it. And there weren't hundreds of them, only the five I’ve already met and another one already sitting around the table, the one who I’d be playing against. A slight edge was taken off of my nerves once I realised the leader, at least who I assumed to be the leader, looked like my oldest neighbour, Eliza. Picture any old lady who you just know is inherently nice, likes everyone, except Mr. Conroy, is adamant that you call her by her first name and looks like she’s never even thought of a swear word. That’s what Eliza looks like with round glasses and eyes that close when she smiles. This is who I was supposed to play against. It’s incredibly weird to recognise the person, but also know that there’s nothing familiar behind the face. As I sat on the chair opposite to hers with the rest of them huddling around us, I could feel my body trying to express its natural bias towards a flight response through varying methods of nausea, irregular pulse and trembling lungs. But my mind, my, at times, very useless mind thought how they all looked like my neighbours, so how bad could this situation really be? Yes, double the size of them, but neighbours nevertheless.

“Yes?” one of the neighbours whose name I never remembered, a nice fellow anyhow, inquired suddenly. I had no idea what he was asking me and just kept looking at him, mouth slightly open and eyes conveying my helplessness. Eliza continued for him, “there is something you want to ask.”

I’m not sure if they meant about the rules or something, but I knew what was highest on my list.

“Why do you all look like my neighbours?”

“Oh”, one of them exhaled quietly.

“Is it not good?” Mr. Conroy asked next and they all looked at each other with confused expressions, concerned even. Another neighbour whose name I couldn’t remember, but recognised as the twelve-year-old girl from the family a few doors down mine, added “we thought it would make you feel more comfortable. You are community animals, are you not?”

“Well, I guess yes we are.” I answered, taken aback. I wonder what they would’ve thought if they knew I didn’t even remember half of their names. Did I reflect the whole of our species or was I just an unfortunate pick. Maybe the real Alex Stone would’ve remembered the names of six of their neighbours. Probably remembers the names of everyone they’ve ever met.

“Good”, Eliza’s voice exclaimed loudly, “let’s start then.” She handed me a pen and a sheet of paper and continued, “and remember, if I win we will take this planet.” My heartbeat had gained some level of regularity, but after her reminder, it was once again orchestrating an entirely new rhythm.

“Simple rules, whoever finishes filling the numbers first, wins” Mr. Conroy, who I assume is like a second hand creature to Eliza, which surely would amuse both of the real people, since they absolutely did not like each other, barely even waved hello on the street. No one knows why they dislike each other. It has garnered some interesting theories.

“You may begin.”

Flipping to the right side of the paper, I saw it very much resembled the normal pages of a Sudoku book. Four different grids with each displaying different combinations of the nine numbers, picking up my pen, I could see Eliza had already started to fill her paper. I took a deep breath, reminded myself that I know what to do and soon got into the rhythm of filling those familiar numbers. Now all those moments spent filling different Sudoku books, though only the easy ones, seemed like they were perfect preparation for exactly this moment; six alien creatures that looked like my neighbours showcasing very high interest in what I was doing, while we all hovered over my place and waited for the fate of the world to be decided. A very satisfying, if not also highly delusional, thought came to me as I finished off with last of the numbers. Maybe they did pick the right Alex Stone. The world would not be taken over today, I was quicker. I had won. And most surprisingly, that was it.

After I put down my pen, they all looked at me with surprise as I said I was done. One of them picked my paper and started going over it, Eliza kept looking at them, seemingly waiting for their verdict. The one checking it nodded and said out loud to everyone “yes, all of this is correct. She won.” A quiet murmur started, Eliza shook my hand and thanked me, told me to never say a word of this to anyone, and then started to leave with everyone else. I continued to sit there, dumbfounded, because really, what was happening?

“Come”, Ms. Field waved at me from the door.

“What just happened?”

She looked at me like I was dumb. “You won, so now we’ll get you back to your home.”

“But that was it?” I quietly pressed once I got close to her.

“Yes. We told you, we enjoy games and you were better today”, she explained with a smile and continued, “congratulations, you get to keep your planet. Remember though, you’re not to talk about this with anyone.” The surprise of all of it kept me quiet.

We got to the same place where I woke up. She started tapping something on the screen, pinched me with something and pushed a few buttons. I don’t think I really understood in the course of any of this what was happening. It felt like I had been there for less than an hour. Finally, she opened a hatch on the floor and the amount of relief I felt from seeing the daylight peeking from below almost made me cry.

“Ready?”

“Have you ever lost before?” I had to ask.

She smiled, took my hand and guided me to sit on the edge of the opening so my legs were already hanging outside.

“No, we have not. But we’ve never met any of your kind either.” Her hands were cold, she was double the size, but up close her eyes did look just as kind as the real Ms. Field’s. She nudged me off to the sky.

When I woke up, I was once again in my backyard, laying peacefully on the ground where my phone, picnic blanket and my book were left waiting for me. They weren’t up there anymore and I don’t know if anyone else ever even saw them. By all logic, by any logic really, all of this was just a very vivid dream, none of it actually happened and the world wasn’t in danger of my neighbours taking over it. I do wonder if they would’ve still looked like my neighbours when taking over the planet? But that was never even going to happen, so best not to think about it, right? I mean, it absolutely could not have happened, it didn’t even make any sense, why did they pick something they could lose at? Why even play? Why not just start shooting and destroying or whatever their methods were? My phone suddenly rang and I could feel my heart skipping a few beats. It was only my friend, asking if he could come over.

As I was about to tell him about the weirdest dream I’ve ever had, my blood suddenly ran cold. This is the feeling I imagine prey animals get when they know they’re about to die. It felt like my heart was swelling in size, pushing everything away until I couldn’t breathe, I was afraid my ribs would push through my skin. I stayed completely still, I didn’t realise I had dropped my phone or that my friend was calling my name. And then my mind started to fill with different images. Places destroyed, empty of any life, people killed or dying. Images of fires spreading through cities and forests. I started to sweat. I was convinced my skin was starting to melt the more the pictures kept coming up. I could hear people screaming and shouting as clear as anything, tortured cryings and wailings, alarms from cars and speakers and people. Every sound was going off at once and it didn’t stop. And through all of it a small whisper, constant and mocking, your fault. If I had a gun I would’ve shot myself right there and then. The feeling of utter despair and agony eating off my brain. There was nothing else.

And then just as suddenly it started, it stopped. The call was disconnected, birds were singing somewhere up in the trees again, the only thing indicating something had occurred was my erratic breathing. My skin wasn’t melting, no fires, no cries, nothing had happened at all. I started to cry and threw up on the ground. I didn’t know how to continue, and I’m afraid I still don’t. I became afraid of talking in fear of anything setting off that kind of panic again. It feels like I don’t know how to even talk anymore. I’ve started to avoid thinking as well, just to be safe. I wonder, what will become of me if I continue to spend my life afraid of thinking and speaking?