The Show Biz

It was just a normal morning when Finn McAlister, a world-renowned producer who had numerous blockbusters, went to the local supermarket near Beverly Hills to get some milk. He entered and went to the dairy aisle. It was 6:00 AM. No one except two men in gray suits were there. Finn grabbed the milk and went to the cash register.

He paid for the milk and started walking out the exit. The two men followed. He reached his mansion and poured a nice glass of cold milk. When he started making his daily waffles, he just so happened to look out the window.

There they were, in their gray suits and sunglasses, standing right on the sidewalk across from him. Strange. Finn ignored this and went on with his day.

As he was watching TV on his couch, he decided to drink yet another glass of milk. He started humming a song. “Hmm hmm hmm hmm hmm hm-”

“FBI OPEN UP!!!”

Finn was bewildered. He didn’t know what to do. He had only heard that dialogue in the movies, and movie studios, but never in real life! He slowly walked towards the door. He was just about to open it when it came crashing down.

Finn didn’t know when he started to, but he ran. He ran like his life depended on it. He hid in the bathroom, locking the door. “Where is he?!” shouted a voice downstairs. “Dunno,” said another one.

Finn heard steps near him every few minutes, but they never searched the bathroom.

Suddenly, he heard a door open behind him. “Come with us,” a voice says while handcuffing him, “You know what you did. And don’t try any funny business, you’ll be lying in a pool of blood before you move an inch.”

“Awwww man!” thought Finn, he had left the second door unlocked. “Um, I don’t know what you’re talking about!”

“As we said,” one of the voices said while frog-marching him down the stairs, “You know what you did.”

When they left the mansion, they shoved him into the backseat of a black SUV. They started driving. “Okay, I am asking this for the last time, what are you arresting me for?”

“Fine, I’ll tell ya what ya did McAlister,” replied the man riding shotgun, “15 eyewitnesses have seen ya robbing 2 banks.”

“What! I have never robbed a bank in my life! I don’t even NEED to! I have enough money to support me for the next 10 years without moving a finger!” answered Finn. The officers did not answer and kept on driving.

Half an hour later, they reached an abandoned warehouse. The officer who was driving took the car inside it. They were greeted by tall shelves of slimy gunk and broken down forklifts with flies buzzing around.

“Why are we here instead of a federal agency?” asked Finn.

“You’ll see,” answered one of the men. They shoved him into a room that seemed like someone fought in it. Numerous chairs and tables were upturned and it reeked of moldy food.

“Wait until we call the t- I mean the interrogator,” One of the men said while going out of the room, “Ag- I mean, Officer Alek will guard you.”

“Strange,” Finn thought, “What was he going to say?”

When the officer returned, he was accompanied by a man with a clean-shaven face, and blond hair. “Hello, Finn,” He said, “Welcome to my torture chamber.”

“What do you mean! You’re the interrogator! You’re supposed to interrogate me on a crime that I DIDN’T DO! Not torture me!” Finn yelled.

“Of course, of course. Do you even recognize me?”

Finn looked closer. He did not see anything that reminded him of anything. “Uhh, I think we have a misunderstanding. I don’t recognize you!”

“Yes,” The blond-haired man drawled. He had a look of pure loathing. “Of course. I should’ve known. Maybe this will run your brain a little,” He thwacked Finn across the face, leaving a red mark.

“Why did you do that?!” Finn screamed in protest.

“Because of your ignorance. You did not recognize me.,” the man answered, “You did not recognize the man who begged and BEGGED you to let him be an actor in your STUPID movie ‘The Stars.’ It is I, Vlad Ivanov!”

“YOU!” Finn said, with a look of understanding on his face, “HAHAHA! You didn’t even have the acting talent of a FLY! And you thought I would let you act in ‘The Stars’! NOOO! It would have been a flop! I’ve got a reputation to uphold, alright!”

“Who are your comrades? I have seen enough to know that they are not FBI officers,” asked Finn.

“They are my ... assistants, let’s say. They are Alek and Andrei. They will be assisting me in getting your money, Finn McAlister. Huh, such a stupid name.”

“My money? Wh-why do you want my money?” inquired Finn.

“For sweet, sweet, revenge. Isn’t it obvious? You RUINED my acting career! And once I get your money, people will appreciate my talent and acting skills, and I shall be the BEST actor in the WORLD!”

“Seriously?” Finn remarked, “You’re going to rob me of my money for revenge? For the fact that I, like any other reasonable and logical producer, declined your audition to become an actor? SERIOUSLY? That is such a lame reason.”

“FINE! We’ll see how you feel once you have been stripped of your money!” Vlad growled.

“And how, may I ask, will you convince me to just give you all of my hard-earned money?”

“You’ll need to experience it for yourself,” Vlad said while gesturing to Andrei. He went out of the room and came back holding a pistol. “It is simple. Either you give me your money, or you die. Simple.”

“If I give him my money, who knows what he’ll do with it. But if I do, he won’t kill me,” Finn thought, “But even if I do, I still have my status as a producer. I can still earn some more money.” 

“Fine! Fine! I’ll give you my money!”

“Good. Give me your bank PIN and username.”

Finn wasn't about to give his bank PIN over to Vlad! Instead, he just made up a fake username and PIN. He told him the fake account. Vlad seemed happy with it.

“Very good McAlister. Prepare to die,” he said, as he loaded the pistol.

“NOOO!” Finn screamed as he braced himself for the bullet that never came. “What?” He spoke aloud, as he got up after a few seconds and took in his surroundings.

He saw Vlad lying on the ground, gagged and handcuffed, with Alek on top of him, holding him down. “Good morning Mr. McAlister. We are the FBI,” said Andrei in a businessy voice, while holding up an ID card. “We apologize for the inconvenience that we had caused you. My colleague and I request you to let one of us drive you back home.”

Finn was utterly bewildered, but all the same, he let Andrei drive him back home. “B-but why were you undercover?”

“Vladimir Ivanov has had a treacherous history. Ever since you didn’t pick him for “The Stars,” he’s been going on a killing spree. Remember the death of old Bailey Bunkins? It was him. He broke into his house and strangled him to death. He’ll be serving a very long year in prison after his trial. But it’s all over now.”

Wannabe actors who try to kill you for revenge and FBI agents who work undercover! Just your average day in the show biz.