Recipe for WOW: Writing Off Wounds

Recipe For WOW: Writing Off Wounds

Family wounds cut deep. If not treated they fester and may never heal. How are these wounds created and how can they ever hope to be written off and forgotten? Here is an old family recipe not recommended to be followed:

Start with an elderly man, not quite at his expiration date, finely aged to the point of crotchety. Make sure he is left alone a lot to pursue his own interests. These interests usually involve tinkering with his antique vehicles. Best if he has been neglecting his health.

Stir in plenty of grief, disappointments and anger in general at the world.

Combine with a somewhat selfish daughter raised supposedly with sugar and spice but unfortunately not much nice. There may well be unknown extenuating circumstances premixed. Exactly what had her childhood been like? Because the wife is gone and another daughter has passed away, she becomes the best choice to be appointed executive of her father's meager estate with all power of attorney. After all she has working knowledge as an advocate for elder rights and her son is an attorney.

Pepper in various other freeze-dried relatives not really capable of making a difference.

Three sisters duly concerned but one passes away prematurely and one has the onset of dementia. That leaves one hovering to be of assistance however necessary. And willingly offers help.

Also, one half-forgotten half brother, fifteen years his junior and two-hundred and fifty miles away. He becomes the control factor. Everyone looks to him to solve everything.

Now add the drama. Pop suddenly gets sick and needs surgery. Doctors agree the prognosis is not too good. He spends a long time in the hospital.

Stir the pot. Pop's landlord wants the use of the apartment for a family member. It is still questionable whether he will survive. Let the pot boil over as the landlord suddenly passes away and the place needs to be cleared out.

Daughter-dear announces she will have a yard sale on such and such day. Sister offers to help. When sister arrives she finds everything has been sold or given away the week before the given date. All his clothes including cherished homemade vests given to him by friends during his biking days are gone. She has sold all eight of his vehicles most in some stage of restoration. One had a special air cleaner atop it that was designed by a diseased friend. She did manage to take his 60-inch TV to her own basement.

Add in the element of surprise. Pop recovers enough to go to a nursing home. He should have money from his bank account or the sale of these vehicles to put towards his care but there is none there. He has need of his birth certificate and other legal papers. Nothing can be found other than a will that left all to daughter. He can't remember writing that will. All family photos have been discarded.

Simmer on hold until the anger turns cold.

Instead of turning cold it sautes as Pop regains strength and passions flare up again. Something must be done as she has cheated him out of all his life savings and personal treasures. He turns to his younger half-brother expecting him to start proceedings to see to it she answers for her misdeeds.

Turn the heat up higher. Daughter threatens to never let him see his great-grand children again if she is brought up on charges.

Brother turns to state to see what should be done. State decides should be overlooked and dropped. They don't want to bring charges against her.

He talks Pop down from the pinnacle. Families are expected to forgive one another. She thought he was going to die. She didn't have time or know what else to do. (She should have had money for a storage unit. Incidentally, when her sister was ill, she took a trip with insurance money. But she deserved that for everything she did, right?)

Toss in more complications. Looking into other avenues Brother discovers she has violated laws and if convicted she could serve time and her son would lose his attorney privileges. Does Pop want to hurt his grandson, too? Has she hurt other people too in her position of advocate? Surely she knows all the ends and outs. Is she trying to get back at her dad for something he has done?

Proof is in the pudding. At one point she forbade the nursing home to give out any information to sister or brother. Eventually she turns power of attorney for his health over to his sister. Brother takes over banking.

Pop shares a room with a long time resident that has claimed three-quarters of the room for himself. Pop yearns for his own place once more. He has fully recovered and put on weight but feels he has little to live for. His only surviving daughter mistreated his trust in her. He does not have a good relationship with his grandson so doesn't get to see his great-grandchildren. Anything he ever cherished is gone. He wants to be out tinkering in a garage once more.

Sister has offered him to come live with her but she has a husband that would probably soon tire of that. Same with Brother that has a wife who would struggle eventually. He also questions Pop's mental health. Signs of dementia are starting to show. The place where he is is probably the best place for him.

Add the topping. Daughter has announced she is leaving the state with no forwarding address. She claims she has no way of getting his big TV back to him or anyone else. Pop went out for his walk a few days ago and when he came back there was a package on his bed. Inside was his birth certificate, a few photos and other mementos and the mysteriously disappearing air cleaner. He wants to mount it above his headboard. Hopefully it won't fall on his head and kill him.