End of All Summers

For fifty-one weeks each year, Ethan Mercer counted down to the only week he allowed himself to be completely happy.

He took in the magical view as he walked the short distance from the train he took from Milan to the dock at Verenna.

This had become a ritual and would be the fifth trip: a milestone of some kind, he thought.

He was far from home. He expected no one to know him. But then the ferry captain who greeted him said, “She’s already there. She’s waiting for you.”

The short ride on Lake Como was like a passage to a world where he could be completely happy again.

As Bellagio grew larger and larger in the view, he searched for her at the dock. The short trip always seemed much longer than 15 minutes.

Then he saw her, smiling and waving as if this happened every day rather than once a year. They hugged, but more briefly this time, making Ethan wonder.

No one at the hotel knew exactly who Ethan Mercer and Claire Donovan were to each other. The hotel staff had stopped guessing after their third Labor Day. They arrived together, requested the same room, stayed exactly seven nights, and left together only as far as the ferry. Then they went in opposite directions for another year.

The hotel clerk checked Ethan in and said to both, “Welcome back again. Claire said, “Yes, I think this is the only week of the year that we get right!”

A female assistant manager came out of her office to look and recognized Clair, and they greeted each other in Italian. Ethan doesn’t speak Italian. He thought he heard something about reservations but can’t figure it out. He forgets about it, and he and Clair walk hand in hand toward the room.

Ethan opened the door and offered to carry her in. She laughs and says, “If you hurt yourself, it would ruin the mood, Sir. Gallantry accepted. I’ll walk myself in”

Ethan wheels his suitcase to the closet and takes a look around. “You arrived first; tell me, do you think anything changed?”

“It’s just like every year.” She answered.

“How does this feel like home?” Ethan asks.

Claire goes silent, then answers more slowly, choosing her words: “It’s home? A refuge from the past?”

From the patio, they can see the lake, the part of town they know so well. And the mountains in the distance.

He wakes to her saying, “Ready for a swim?”

They quickly change and grab beachwear. Clair challenges Ethan to a race. “Who can get to the floater first? Bet I can beat you.” Ethan and Clair dive in, show great swimming form, and are essentially tied in the race. They pull themselves onto the floating platform and enjoy the sun, just relaxing. They’re both quite fit and look wonderful, separately or together.

Ethan looks at Clair appreciatively. “What are you looking at? She asks, blushing. “

“Well, honestly, you look grand. Your Roman heritage reveals itself. You rival some of those statues I see of Goddesses”

I’ll try to take that with a grain of salt. You know I’m much younger than they?” Ethan laughs. “Love your sense of humor”.

“Ethan, I was noticing all our favorite haunts are still there: favorite café, the bicycle rental, and the boat rental. We should set up our favorite activities again.”

“Clair, you brought your dance shoes, I hope!” “Of course! She smiled.

“Ready for another race?” They dove in and got to shore. They enjoyed walking barefoot on the beach, taking in the view.

They felt the swim was a good down payment on a workout. Fairly glowing from just enough sun, they changed into evening wear and headed for their favorite café.

“Order my usual.” She said as she left for the “powder room.” He knew her favorites for food, coffee, dessert, and dance places.

The waiter showed up, saying, “Good to see you again? Your usual drink? For the lady also?”

Ethan smiled and nodded, “Of course?”

Ethan and Clair went outside, found a place to sit, and watched the moon reflected in the lake. They exchanged smiles. They both saw a young couple obviously on their honeymoon. Their laughter and mood were contagious.

Claire said quietly, “I used to think moving to be with someone was the bravest thing a person could do.” Then silence. Ethan smiles at her. They move closer together and lean against each other.

“I think we’ve got this. “She said, and he nodded. Indeed, they’d make reservations and have a full, joyful, and playful week ahead.

She looked at him seriously again. She got up, took his hand, and walked with him to their room. We have a very full day tomorrow in fantasy land.”

It was morning. Claire woke up with a start: “Dibs on the bathroom!” Ethan responds, “It’s yours. I’m still waking up.”

Clear finished, and Ethan is still relaxing in bed. He thinks she wants breakfast, so he goes in to clean up for a slightly formal morning. When he walks out, Clair is standing there in her bathing suit, saying “Race you again!”

“I’ll be right out he added as he headed back in with his suit in hand and finally walked out looking ready for a little competition with his travel partner.

They walk together to the beach and the dock, then dive in. The water is cool and clear, and they race again. Claire wins this time. She says, “Aww, hope losing won’t sour our relationship!” No, Ethan responds jokingly, “I'd say we get along swimmingly.” She rolls her eyes and laughs. “I see your sense of humor coming out more and more. I wonder what else will be revealed? I think I like it!”

Ethan and Claire head back to their room, and by then it’s time for lunch at the village café. She excuses herself to use the powder room. The waiter, now familiar with them both, asks, “The usual, sir?” Ethan smiles and says, “Of course.”

Clair returns; they have a little small talk, and then Clair asks, “ What do you think of this?” She shows him a flyer about a hiking trail.

He replies, “Perfect! I was hoping we’d find something like that!”

They take to the trail; their hiking gear, fitted in luggage, is now on, and they’re enjoying the weather, the sun, the views, and the scent of mountain air.

After a few miles, they are doing great, except for a sudden thunderstorm. They dash for cover under an old stone arch. They huddle together and enjoy the closeness and the sense of refuge they find. “ Nothing like hiding out together, is there?” She laughs. They hike back slowly, enjoying the scenery and feeling happy about the day and about being together.

After recovering and cleaning up from the hike, they go to a restaurant. They celebrate with wine and good food and talk until late. Then they go to their favorite dance place.

They hang out, try dancing, and are getting back in step after a year of no practice.

An elderly couple walks up to their table and says politely, “You and your wife dance beautifully.” Ethan thanks them without correcting their impression. Of course, they’re not married, but they appreciate the compliment anyway.

It’s past midnight, and they head out for a leisurely walk on the beach. The breeze is wonderful the air smells great. They walk barefoot for a while, just taking in all the sensations.

“Where did the day go? Claire asked. “Exactly as every wonderful thing goes. Pure happiness.” Claire nods and says, “Sure does. Look at the time!”

They head back to the room very tired and very happy. Ready for bed, they hug and then wish each other a good night. Exhausted, they quickly fall asleep.

It’s morning again. This time, they don’t wake up very early. “Wow! Look at the time!” Clair says. Ethan rolls over to glance at the clock with one open eye. “I guess we need a slow day.”

Breakfast is a little late, but it’s great. The waitstaff know them and what they want almost wordlessly. Claire and Ethan look around the room and decide there’s work to do. So much fun and living make a messy room. They gather the laundry and hang out while the clothes wash and dry. Dull stuff, but she’s good company.

They go shopping. Ethan discovers he enjoys shopping with Clair. They make it fun and come back with something they can cook together for dinner.

They head for a coffee shop and walk about. They browse through a bookstore for at least an hour, discuss what they find, and leave with a book each.

They go to the room and recline on the patio, each with a book. No witty conversation, no affection, no attention. They are happy just to be. Ehan remembers previous times in his life like this. He sometimes thinks the best parts look boring.

After a while, they work on dinner together. They make mistakes and sometimes don’t chop or dice things as Clair would prefer, but they have fun despite a few culinary missteps. Dinner turns out to be good despite everything. It was prepared with laughter and the feeling that anything thrown together would be perfect for tonight.

They conclude that this was a great day, even though dull by most standards.

As they’re cleaning up, Clair notices Ethan’s wedding band hanging from a chain on his neck. “Do you ever take it off? “She asks.

Ethan was quiet for a moment and then said matter-of-factly, “Only when I swim”

Clair had never thought to ask before.

Another passes. They become curious about each other. They’ve had a great day once again, and they’re sitting on a terrace together after dancing. No music.No distractions. They’re ready for some honest talk about their previous lives.

Claire begins. Clair followed Daniel. Left her career. Started over. Six months later, he accepted another opportunity.

Then quietly says, "I wasn't angry." Ethan looks surprised. She smiles sadly. "I just promised myself I'd never build my life around someone else's plans again." She lost trust in her own judgment. Ethan doesn't answer immediately. Then... He says, "I envy that."

Claire is confused. She smiles sadly. “I just promised myself I’d never build my life around someone else's plans again.” He continues. "At least you got to be angry."

"The last thing my wife asked me to do was buy peaches." Claire waits. He smiles. "By the time I got back from the grocery store, she couldn't talk anymore."

Claire quietly reached across the table. She touches his hand.

It was another happy day, but it’s night. Their last one for another year.

Claire says, "Sometimes I wonder if we're together because neither of us knows how to ask for more."

Ethan admits, "I don't know how to stop being a widower."

Claire answers with something equally revealing. “I don't know how to trust forever."

“Come to bed. We can enjoy being curled up together, Ethan”

Ethan hugs her and senses something is different. Clair nestles closer and smiles.

Why is she smiling? He wonders.

Their final day arrives. It’s their last morning together for another year, Ethan thinks, and looks at Clair, who seems to avoid his gaze, and then looks at him with a hint of worry.

They have finished breakfast with a great view and great coffee, and now stand on the dock, waiting for the ferry.

Her ferry comes first. They make a clean break at the end of the week for another year. They part here, rather than a long, tearful departure at the airport. They hug carefully as if they are both breakable.

Her ferry arrives, and the captain waves at him. He stands by the railing, watching her ferry depart and take her across the lake. Another Summer has ended. Another year of ritual has ended.

Weeks later, Ethan is back home in Boston and imagines Clair is in Los Angeles. He is back in his usual routine. A few days later. He receives an automated email.

“Subject:

Your Labor Day reservation has been canceled.

“Dear Mr. Ethan Mercer, we are sorry your reservations for next year have been canceled. We are sorry to see that. As you know, we are always fully booked. I’m afraid you cannot make a new reservation for next year at this time. We are once again fully booked a year in advance. I hope we will see you again someday. You are such a lovely couple and great guests.

Sincerely

The hotel management”

He didn't cancel it. She did. Months ago. Without telling him. Now he understands.

She'd already decided that It’s over.

He thinks it over. “It didn’t just end at the end of Summer; it ended forever.”

He deletes the email.

Walks away. Taking a long walk does little to soothe him.

A week later, he is coming home in the morning. He pulled an “all-nighter”. He’d not done that since he was in school. He was tired. He felt like the numbness that filled the place where he remembered Clair was getting better. He was also frustrated. It was mid-morning. He used the showers at work. It helped, but it didn’t make the crazy downtown Boston traffic any more tolerable.

A moving van had pulled into a driveway, partially blocking the street. There was furniture in the road, in the driveway, and on the lawn, and the moving crew was frantically trying to clear up the mess.

He gave in to the moment and pulled to the curb to wait it out. No sense getting upset about something he couldn’t fix. Love affairs, careers, and he thought his love life and career didn’t work together.

It was chaos, but he figured it was someone moving in, not out. He watched patiently.

A familiar figure stood with her back to him. He got out of the car and walked toward the figure.

Claire turned around. She stopped looking shocked. He did too.

“What? “ he tried to say. He lost his voice.

Ethan walked toward Clair as if some warp had put them back in Italy.

He finally found his voice. “I thought you canceled us.”

She smiled and then looked serious and said, “I only canceled the reservation. I did not cancel you.”

“What happened? He asked.

"I got the promotion I always wanted. And it’s here. I start Monday."

“We’d better get moving" He said, offering to take a box and help move her into town blocks away. "I hoped you'd still be here." She said.

Once inside her apartment, he hands her a box marked SUMMER. They stop; she smiles and says, “Looks like we’re going to need new traditions “

“When can we meet again? He asked, not sure what the answer could be.

“Tomorrow is good! How about you?” she smiled.

“I thought our Summer was over and so were we.” He was still worried. But relieved.