Trust Me

                               Trust Me

Standing on the ledge of the tallest building in the city, Shannon looked out towards the skyline. The orange setting sun was slowly dropping on the horizon as the bright sky slowly dimmed. The cool crisp air grabbed at her from all directions as she stood there rigidly looking straight ahead. 

I hate heights, she thought to herself as the sounds of voices from below echoed, bouncing incoherent babble off of the walls of the buildings below. 

A single bead of sweat slowly crawled down her cheek as she looked at the buildings below and then towards the flashing lights of the rescue vehicles. 

“They really do look like ants from this point of view.” Shannon said aloud even though no one else was listening. A small triangular device attached to her right temple, flashed a red light, on and off, on and off as Shannon took a deep breath gathering into her the last few moments of sanity before she took that next step. 

“Shannon, are you ready.” A voice echoed in her brain as she looked around, half expecting to see someone hanging out of the window that she had just crawled out of, but no one was there. Shannon felt the cold brick wall on her back as she stretched out her fingers to feel the rough surface.

“Why am I doing this? I hate heights.” Shannon said aloud again

“Shannon, now come on, we discussed this; this was your plan from the beginning. Take deep slow breaths, look around you, cherish the beauty of the setting sun, the smell of the fresh clean air, remember your husband, your daughter. Can you see them? Look below you to the street, they should be clearly visible to you.”

Shannon looked down towards the street, seeing the flashing lights and the people who had now gathered to see either a dramatic rescue, or the raving lunacy of the idiot now standing on the ledge of the tallest building in this city, jumping to her demise. Shannon could now see the figures of her husband frantically trying to communicate something to one of the officers down below. She could see the fragile frame of her daughter hunched over and convulsing as she cried tears at this tragic event. 

Shannon’s heart pounded fiercely in her chest, as she could not believe that she was putting her husband and daughter through this pain. How could she do this to them, this was not better for them, not in any way? “I can’t do this,” Shannon voiced into the brisk wind. 

“Shannon, you must.” The voice of encouragement echoed around her as she shifted her footing on the narrow ledge. “Wasn’t it you that said every one would be better off without you?”

“I know but now that I’m here…” Shannon started to say but still could not get the words out of her mouth. “It’s hot up here, I thought it would be cold.” Shannon said changing the subject.

“Is it anything like you thought it would be?” The voice questioned

“Shannon, don’t move.” Shannon looked over to her left and there was a man leaning out of the opened window with his hand held out towards her, as if he wanted to shake hands.  “I’m detective Ross Gaudrie, I just want to talk.”

“Please leave me alone.” Shannon said and she sidestepped over to her right to make sure that she was out of reaching distance from this intruder.

“I can’t do that Shannon, I just want to talk. Why don’t you just come inside and we can talk together.” The officer said softly.

“Shannon, ignore him.” The voice echoed in her brain. “We discussed this, it is now time, you have to trust me, take that first step, everything will be ok, I promise.”

“I don’t know, I can’t do this to them.” She said looking down at the two people in the world that she would do anything for, even if it meant that her death would stop their suffering. “If my daughter sees me falling… she wasn’t supposed to be here. I just can’t…” Shannon pleaded with the voice. The triangular device started to hum softly, and the red light began to flash faster.

“Shannon, come on, please, you don’t want your husband and daughter to see you fall.” The officer said, echoing her thoughts. “You just said that you can’t do this, so why don’t you come in the window and we can talk about it.”

“I said leave me alone!” Shannon snapped at the officer. “I was not talking to you!”

“Who were you talking to Shannon, could I speak with her?” The officer said now changing his tactics, thinking that he was dealing with a schizophrenic. 

“It is not a her and no you cannot talk to him, now leave me alone, this has nothing to do with you.” She glared at the officer who was now positioning himself as if he were going to climb onto the window ledge with her. She looked at his uniform and could see the climber’s harness that had just been put on him. She could see the rope that had been attached to the harness and that he was now wearing leather gloves on his hands to protect them if he had to grab both her and the rope at the same time. “Oh yeah, you are some kind of hero, you can’t even bring yourself to step up on this ledge without your protective devices. What do you think I am going to do, push you off? Is that what you think, do you think that my last act in this world would be to grab a hold of your jacket and pull you down with me. Do you want to make a murderer out of my last act of kindness?” She started to rave at the sight of his protective clothing.

“Shannon, I told you, ignore him, he has no stake in this. Now the time has come, take that step, trust me.” The voice said softly. 

Shannon looked at the skyline that was now almost completely black. The spotlights that were brought in for this situation now shone brightly as she felt hotter than ever. She could no longer see the people on the streets, her family or the shapes of the buildings, the spotlights now blinding everything in the darkened night sky. She looked over to her right as Officer Ross Gaudrie was now climbing out of the window onto the ledge. 

The triangular device, still attached to Shannon was now almost a solid red light as the pulsing was so fast that there was barely any space of time between the lights. 

“I’m ready,” Shannon said softly as the officer was now almost completely standing on the ledge. The light was no longer pulsing and was now a solid blood red.

“Trust me Shannon, take that step.” The voice said softly and the light turned green. 

The officer reached out to grab a hold of Shannon’s arm but he was a split second too late. Shannon took a deep breath and took one step forward, allowing her feet to leave the ledge. 

At first she was falling as if she were standing, her body was loose as the triangular device continued to shine green. She took another deep breath and leaned forward, just a little, to allow the motion to let her body fall forward so that she could see the ground approach her, slowly. There was a loud piercing sound that rang in her ears and Shannon looked to the right and then to the left to try to find the source of the sound, then she noticed that she was emanating the sound, it was the sound of her screaming. But I am not afraid. Shannon thought as she continued to scream during her plummet. 

“No Shannon, you are not afraid, but is this not a natural reaction to such a situation?” The voice said in a calming tone. 

You’re still here? Shannon thought.

“Of course I am.” The voice responded. “I told you to trust me, that I would be with you to the end.”     

The ground continued to approach Shannon and the hot air now turned colder as she approached the ground. The wind whipping at her face and pushing her dress against her rapidly descending body, as if the dress were trying to avoid the ultimate conclusion of this last step. Somehow trying to free itself from this anchor so that it could allow the wind to raise it up and allow it to float softly to the ground like a feather caught in the wind. 

As the ground approached Shannon, faster and faster, it was now time to smell that rose that was delivered to her on her sixteenth birthday, from her one and only love and lover, her husband. It was now time to smell that sweet aroma that wafted from her newborn daughter’s bald-head. It was now time to see all of the mistakes that she had made that had led her to this point and where at any point in time, she could have taken a different turn to change her path. Her fate was now carved out in front of her; she had no other choice but to meet the ever approaching ground with dignity. With all of the answers that should have been there when she still had the chance, before she fell into this darkness. Now was the time to start over, but now was too late. 

Just moments before impact, the light on the device flashed a bright yellow. As her frail body now hit the ground the light flashed a blood red, and all was now dark. No pain, no sorrow, no bright light or devil waiting for her soul.

“Shannon.” The voice said softly. “Shannon, wake up dear, it’s over.” Shannon opened her eyes slowly, half expecting to see broken pavement in front of her face, but she was not face down as she thought, she was face up, lying prone on a stretcher, to her left, her husband stood leaning over her and her daughter sat holding tightly onto her hand. A man in a long white coat was on her right with a small instrument in his hand that he was now bringing up towards her temple. “This won’t hurt.”

The doctor removed a small triangular device from her temple and placed it into a small circular container. “How do you feel?” He asked. 

Shannon looked at her husband and daughter. She looked around the room that was filled with light mauve lilacs, her favourite flower, the smell caressed her senses; she looked at the doctor and smiled. “I feel.” She said now with a tear flowing down her cheek. “I feel. I never thought that I would ever feel again. I don’t know how to thank you.” She said now completely crying. “The darkness is gone.”

Her daughter and husband held onto one another with tears in their eyes. 

“I told you Shannon, trust me.” He said in that same soft voice that had just encouraged her to jump from the tallest ledge of the tallest building. “I can honestly say that you will be ok now. Your depression has been addressed, and you can see beyond what was trapped in your mind, and you will no longer feel compelled to end it all. As I told you and your husband, this new procedure allows you to live those final moments, without it actually being final. This treatment teaches you that there are more things in life than the problems that your brain chose to latch on to, that life is a compilation of the good, and the bad and not the dead.”

The Doctor walked over to the other side of the room placing his new tool onto the counter and then turned to Shannon, handing her the container with the triangular device in it. “Just remember Shannon, in the future if you allow yourself to only see the darkness, it is the darkness that will ultimately engulf you. When you feel the darkness starting to work it’s way back into your life, grasp onto any ray of sunshine in your life and I guarantee you, it will lead you back to happiness, trust me.”  

The End