Note: The following story is linked to the previous story 'Anemoia' as a prequel but can be read as a standalone. Terms from the previous story may be used.
My hands touched the window as I peered through the view, the city was always majestic for its shimmer under the purple sky. Below it was the transparent green dome that concealed what remained of us. The silver needle like buildings stood bravely, inches away from piercing the dome while the people squirmed through like ants onto the titanium pavements, others gathered round a fire seeking comfort from their experiences beyond the dome. It even led to the ban of crafts from commuting. Knowing what the beyond looked like felt like a sin, though one would deem it as a simple and vast desertscape until they dared set foot. Perdiphoris was dying and nothing was stopping this deserted wake, not even what father and the others thought.
Taking my handkerchief from the pockets, I clasped my mouth and coughed, blood sputtered everywhere. I didn't have much time as well, it was either the effect or the illness would take my life. The latter was the suitable choice, without knowing what was killing the planet, dying naturally would make sense. Firm hands covered my shoulders, turning my head, I saw my brother with a warm smile drawing over his lips. He always assured me I would be fine but as the days passed, it seemed nothing so. Did he fail to notice or choose to ignore that his attempts of cheering me were declining, I already accepted death was nigh.
"You've looked out the window for too long," he directed me to the sofa that surrounded the hearth. At the center was a stool with two mugs, steam curling upward. "Here, have some Kafero."
He launched the mug upward, I was never a fan of the beverage but through myriad lectures that it would do my health good and him examining me every time, I was entitled to take it. Merdille... I would long be dead were it not for him.
Proceeding to my lips, the door banged open. My mother lay restless with the door forcing itself to open. Her face overflowed with sweat and her eyes forced open, telling us that we should be prepared to leave.
"Mother, what's going on?" Merdille asked.
"Bring something... to force them out," she said, the door resisting.
Just as Merdille made his way, the door gave out and she hurled to the floor. I rushed to her while Merdille stood in front of us, hands and legs covering enough space on either side. At the door were two robust men, with grey overalls, black gloves and surgical masks. Observing us like we were criminals. No doubt, part of 'The Relivers'. The one on the right looked straight at me.
"Kanus Bosiris," he called striking his hand. "You're coming with us."
Without a say, they shoved Merdille to the side and clutched my wrist. My mother held the man's hand.
"NO! Leave my son alone!"
No stretch, they pulled her fingers away and dragged me across the floor. I wasn't allowed the time to stand. The other man stood behind us, blocking all ways through which Mother and Merdille could pass. He shouted, extending his arms, too far of reach. The man seemed like he would tear it down were he to do it again. Trying to do so myself resulted to nothing, the grip was intense. My throat chose a better time to chime forcing me to bend my free arm over my mouth.
To wherever we were going, the door swung open and I was thrown to the front. My head contacting the floor, I closed my eyes, did it hurt but gladly not for a concussion. Regaining stability, I opened them to see a board of men and women in lab coats of the same color as the robust men enclosed with masks, visor glasses and gloves, seven on both sides sitted before lengthy tables. My father was on the right at the center, locking sight, he diverted. Did he set me up for this?
A female from the left stood and paced to me, mother saw her and commenced screaming as Merdille tried to push through, the men took them both by the elbows and laid them to kneel. They placed their hands over their mouths and green like strands emerged, what looked like tapes strew across them. Even with it on, mother persisted with her muffled noises. Confirming they were dealt with, she glanced me offering her hand. I scooched away.
"Kanus Bosiris," she started, her voice so soft that I almost thought she were friendly. " You know who we are, don't you?"
I continued my pursuit. "Monsters."
She looked at the side of my father. "A degrative term, don't you know your father also works for us?"
"I've heard the stories. You're only putting a façade in the name of Perdiphoris..."
A cough interrupted, what a betrayal. The woman laughed, she walked in front of me, I followed her and noticed the tube before her. Door sized, transparent hexagonal tube. Myriad controls lay above in the interior. She walked to it and touched the glass surrounding it.
"Tell me, what have we done that is considered, monster like? Whatever we're doing is for the sake of the planet. We are sustaining a possible future."
"No," I shook my head, standing up. "You Relivers are never this less. You either use yourselves or forced test rats for those experiments."
"And who told you all that? I know for a fact your father can never stoop as low. But yes, we do use ourselves and others. And like I said, for the sake of a possible future. Tell me Kanus, don't you love Perdiphoris?"
A shameful form of persuasion. I loved the planet deeply but I could never condone with their acts, especially with their belief of a future.
"I should be the one asking that question, killing others doesn't mean you have love for the planet," I argued.
"Surely, if one occupies a space while doing nothing of use, shouldn't they be discarded and serve their world as rightful sacrifices?"
I clenched my teeth. "My friend disappeared in your hands."
She placed her finger over her chin and looked at the ceiling like the answers were there. Finally she looked at me. "I have no idea what you're on about."
I wanted to launch forward and kick her but I heard his voice. "Please proceed with what brought him here." Looking at him once more, was that what he had to say, not even an attempt of stopping this.
"Yes, yes," she waved him off. "Even your father has spoken. Well, let me get on with it. We all know that Perdiphoris is dying. An effect, through our study, that is not affecting this planet only but all those located in our solar system. What we denounce as 'The Deteriorate'. "
Hearing the solar system made me shiver. Was that even possible?
"And thus, we aren't monsters, we have been looking for suitable ways of stopping this. And that has led us to use the fellow Perdiphorians you loved. Through their sacrifices, we have found a way, and created a power to quell it."
The tube lit accordingly and thick streams of steam blasted from a pipe among the controls. The side of the glass facing me, opened, I felt a lump in my stomach.
"Longevity," she announced. "Once the right person enters the tube, they will be bestowed with the power to live longer than others and once ready, they may be able to transfer their abundance to others or places that lack of it."
"That means... if they are powerful enough, they'll be able to save the planet," I concluded.
"Quite so, I love that you're catching on. But the power itself is powerful enough for those deemed unworthy, close enough and they vaporize. And all the people we have used, mostly adults were all healthy. But what remains... one who is so close to die."
I shook my head, staggering while the woman strutted. A possibility and what they missed in their equation, who not to choose unlike the one near death. Near the tables, more of them closed in on me, holding my arms and forcing me to the tube. Mother's noises grew louder and I understood her pain.
I rested my palms on the edges but their firm hands pressed farther than anticipated and I yielded. Once in, they banged the glass door, more steam coming in. My heart raced while my head grew hefty. Mother and Merdille couldn't break free no matter what they did and father remained reluctant. How could he? Were we not his family? Those he meant to protect through hardships?
The sides next to me splintered red sparks, some striking through my skin, they blazed fiercer than a flame. They became thicker and foraged deeper, my exposed blood clotted immediately. I shrieked as the pain wreathed through every vein and my eyes fell through to the back of my head. Death, I was prepared for it, time was over for me and I loathed the need to suffer in my illness. I should have reveled so why, why did this time feel like I didn't want to. Was it because it wasn't the illness? Was I truly not ready for it?
If my sight aligned to normal, Merdille broke free from the man and forced his way through to me. The scientists by the tube must have been nothing to him as he shoved them away. He opened the glass and stretched his arm, the only part of him that could make his way to me as they relented. Despite the sparks, he was able to touch my shirt and as though that were the trigger, the tube exploded. Flames blazed in our radius and massive thuds propelled to the walls. Shards scattered across the floor aligned with others in their bleak shrills. All went silent for a moment.
I forced my eyes shut, I could feel my knees on the ground and hurled up close. Despite the shards, it didn't seem I was above them. Merdille, groped the back of my shirt closer then pulled away allowing me to open my eyes. Merdille bore a concerned look, sure enough I believed I was the one who ought to be. Lacerations caressed his face and blood from different sides oozed. Even with all that, he had the same warm smile assessing I was fine.
"Merdille you..."
"It's okay, we need to take Mo..."
He furiously looked behind, some of the scientists were coming up but the big men were out cold, Mother was buried below them. He got up and fled towards her. I followed but I wasn't able to move farther. There was something around my neck, I could feel it but not see it. Turning downward, a thick metal collar, tracking the source I saw the woman with a now half grazed face smiling as wicked and on her hand was a button controlling it.
"No!" Merdille shouted but he wasn't able to come closer.
"It worked," she bellowed. "It actually worked."
I tried to force it out but she took the advantage and slid me close. Her cold fingers pinched my cheeks as she turned my head to the sides. She checked my arms and to my surprise they were fine.
She laughed. "My genius worked! Tell me Bosiris, does your throat hurt?"
She made me halt for a second. It was hard to believe it but she was right. For years on end, this illness ravaged me and the fact that I felt nothing scraping it now was like a dream come true. Did it mean she was right?
"That look on your face, I know it," she bickered. "You're coming with me."
The collar rattled to the opposite. It got stronger and I was off the grip of the mad woman. She resisted and pushed the button forcing me to go back but still pulled to the other direction. If only they asked my consent, it felt like my head were on the verge of splitting from my neck.
The opposite side grew stronger and the collar gave in spitting more sparks and eventually departing from my neck. My savior hugged me and at first I thought it was Merdille until his voice came up.
"I'll be taking my leave now."
Father, after all that time, did he decide to act now? I gazed him, he dared not to meet my look and I relived so. His arms however, they looked funny as though they were sizzling and about to disappear. The woman's words rang.
"Father, you're vaporizing," I told him.
He ignored me and locked gaze with the woman. After a few moments, a loud screeching sound erupted and from it, the bulbs in the room flickered red. Unrest came in from those who were awake and they made their way to the door. The woman was the most perturbed and it looked like she wanted to keep them at bay. Even father's expression changed and this time he looked at me in worry.
"We need to move now," he said.
"You are not going anywhere," she regained control and blast the doors shut. Those who remained, alongside the men, banged the door. Mother was free and Merdille stood close to her.
"What is this madness Auguria, open the doors!" one of them demanded.
"The power of longevity has finally been discovered. Do you seriously think I will allow it to be mishandled for the sake of the rest of the galaxies? If we are meant to die then so be it for everyone else."
The chaos caught up as the ground quaked and some of the bulbs fell. Yet again, I didn't feel prepared for death and even with this blessed ability, it was impossible to know how to trigger it. Guilt and dread consumed me, to think my simple lie was so easy.
Merdille walked in front of us, I thought he would face the woman but didn't reach her. He curled his hand into a fist and channeled his strength to the floor. Cracks multiplied and we fell. The impact must have left most with broken legs but as for me and I noticed those closer to me, were all fine. How did he possess such strength.
We were at the hangar, attributed by the disc shaped crafts parked at slots by the sides. Those confined ever since the deteriorate began. At the main entrance, a larger one parked like it was ready to leave. It was broad and silver with open glass doors and an inclined ramp. Father moved away and held my hand, approaching Merdille, he grabbed his and sprinted to the doors.
Auguria saw us, she lay on the ground and unable to move straightened her arm. "They're trying to escape, stop them!"
Without room for closure, he shoved us in and the ramp and doors automatically responded. Beside him was mother with tears on the verge and a smile that aided to force them in. Seeing more smiles plagued my mind. Merdille punched the glass but couldn't budge, veins popped up intertwined with heavy breaths. The scars on his face were oddly long gone.
"We said we're doing this together," he imploded.
"I said you and your brother," mother corrected and looked at father. With him holding me too close, his abdomen could hardly be classified. It looked like his body was made of a clump of clouds which gradually disappeared, I gritted my teeth. The others struggled but tried to reach us.
"Kasel, explain to them as quickly as possible," mother urged.
He also shared the smile. "At this point since you interfered, I know you know that you have access to this power Merdille. And for that reason, the mission must go on as intended. I'm sorry I acted so distant and cold toward you all but you must survive and save the others from suffering."
"You can't do this," Merdille insisted.
"Sorry but I already have," father said with another smile and the both of them turned to me. "We bought you more time to spend with him, use it wisely and be braver as you must." They held hands, their colleagues closing in.
"We love you both."
The doors tinted and the ship hovered. With tremendous speed, it shot through the air and made due course to the reaches I never thought. Merdille overwhelmed with tears dashed to a set of stairs that must have led to the bridge. I followed.
With clear windows at the front, we were able to see it. Our knowledge persisted that the planet was purple but what we saw was nothing close. Even from our distance, the color was crystal to us, light brown spread across everywhere. Perdiphoris became a desert planet.
Merdille clenched his fists and gazed the ground, he mumbled unintelligent words. He, the older brother, was burdened with the events, what chance was there if we both lost hope.
The tears were contagious, I didn't want to cry but how could I not, everyone I knew including father and mother were gone.
"Merdille?" I cried." What are we going to do."
He stared at me, one I had never seen and made me think twice of what I asked. He approached me and placed his palm on my shoulder.
"We are going to master whatever ability we have," he said. "And we shall prevent this from ever happening."
He looked at his other hand and clenched it as well.
"From this day forth, we are The Navigators."
You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.
Hello everyone,
One of you requested that the ending of Anemoia was well done that I had to continue the story, I'm still unsure how it will play out but I tried to tie in a prequel that would answer what the origins of the power of longevity looked like. I'm not sure how well I did that so it may still feel it's lacking since I realized that I passed the 3000 word mark as I wrote it and had to tone it down.
As per the continuation of Anemoia, it will depend on how well the prompts work for me but I would want validation from this prequel. Will it be worth continuing after reading this? Thank you all for liking and some commenting in my stories. I would never improve without you guys.
Reply
I think you clarified the origins of The Navigators and the power of longevity well. You should definitely continue with Anemoia. I’m looking forward to it! Both are really great stories!
Reply
Thanks Veronika
Reply
It's absolutely worth to continue:
What I enjoyed most here was the sense of scale. You start with a sick boy looking out over a dying city and gradually widen the lens until the fate of an entire planet is at stake. The relationship between Kanus and Merdille grounded the story for me; amid all the lore, powers, and collapsing worlds, it was their bond that carried the emotional weight.
I also liked that the title only fully clicks into place at the end. The final line felt less like an ending and more like the beginning of a much larger journey.
Every week there's at least one prompt that is so generally vague that you can fit in every story you want.
Should you need further advice or editorial tips, I'm always happy to assist.
Keep on writing!
Reply
Will ensure to make the effort, so sorry took long to reply
Reply
I really enjoyed reading this…I will have to check out the other one that came before it. I will look forward to seeing more of ‘The Navigators.’
Reply
Thank you so much for reading Mr. Chambers. With how the prompts will work out, I will continue the story.
Reply
This story is haunting and deeply moving, that captures the intimate family grief as the characters face a genuinely unsettling moral dilemma. Your world-building over the last two stories really gives this piece depth and weight. Lines like “Surely, if one occupies a space while doing nothing of use, shouldn't they be discarded and serve their world as rightful sacrifices?” are chilling in how calmly they justify cruelty. Brutal. The ending hits hard, and it stayed with me long after I finished reading, the burden has passed to the brothers, and the weight of that responsibility lingers. Really nicely done!!! We need the next one!!
Reply
Thank you so much for reading T.O.I. Am really glad that everything worked well, I wasn't sure whether I did it well and I was worried it would be a bit jarring. But the main thing I wanted to do was tie the loose ends that would have come up in Anemoia so as to progress the story. Thanks so much for reading and yes, I shall make the effort to continue the story.
Reply
Look forward to your next one!!
Reply
Good job on this one too! It’s a fun world that you’re building. I like that you wrote a prequel to give more context, but I also appreciate that we can read each of them as a standalone. You show the strength of the family well and the fact that the parents sacrificed themselves for their sons shows the deep love they have for them and Perdiphoris. I’m glad that the brothers have each other and I love the bond that you created between them. I can’t wait to see their next adventure!
Reply
Thanks for dropping by Miss Winchester.
I wanted to show the familial bond above all the chaos running rampant and I am glad that it has bloomed through your feedback, thanks again.
Reply
I think this is a solid opening. The world caught my attention, and I wanted to keep reading to find out what was going on with Perdiphoris, the dome, and the Deteriorate. The relationship between Kanus and Merdille is the strongest part of the chapter because it gives me someone to care about. The ending worked for me. "From this day forth, we are The Navigators" feels dramatic, but it also feels like the beginning of a much bigger story, which is what I want from a first chapter. I think this has a lot of potential. The world is interesting, the sibling relationship is strong, and the chapter ends with a hook that makes me want to know what happens next.
Reply
Thanks so much for reading Rebecca, I put slot of effort in this and I wanted to see how well it would bloom. I also wanted to answer some questions that may have proved confusing, thanks for reading.
Reply
I liked how the sense of a dying planet and the mysterious dangers added tension and intrigue. I also enjoyed how the protagonist’s illness, the family’s desperation, and the looming threat from The Relivers created high emotional stakes. The relationships between characters felt authentic and poignant. I especially liked the bond between the siblings.
The ending of your story is especially powerful and uplifting. I liked how you ended on a note of hope, and the brothers' renewed purpose felt satisfying and inspiring. I appreciated how you gave their journey closure while opening the door to new possibilities, showing their growth and resilience.
I think this story works beautifully as a prequel to Sophia’s journey. You set up the world’s lore, introducing The Navigators and establishing the core conflicts and emotional stakes that carried over into Sophia’s story. I liked how you repeated themes of sacrifice, hope, and difficult choices that connect the two stories. It made Sophia’s later experiences feel even more meaningful! Great work!
Reply
Thank you so much Veronika. I felt totally unsure about how this story played out but through your thoughts I see I've done it well. I am especially glad that all the themes came about as intended and that you think the prequel serves well as a starting point for Sophia's journey into this mysterious and complex world she is about to enter. Thank you so much for your thoughts.
Reply
You're welcome. You handled it well.
Reply