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Write a story that includes the line “This isn’t what I signed up for.”

Posted in Short Story on May 2, 2025

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✍️ 98 stories

Lease Agreement for a Daydream Body

Submitted to Contest #301

The body arrived in bubble wrap, the return label reading '24-Hour Free Trial.'Nina Columbo traced her fingers along the packaging. After thirty-nine years of inhabiting the same tired skin—skin that had witnessed sixteen-hour trauma ward shifts, a near-marriage, and years of prescription sleep aids—she was about to step into someone else.The body would need calibration before tonight's wedding reception.Nina's reflection watched from the hallway mirror—bloodshot eyes, hair that hadn't seen proper conditioning in weeks, skin with the dull pa...

47 likes 18 comments 18
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This isn’t what I signed up for

Shortlisted for Contest #301 ⭐️

Dave knew he was in trouble the moment Melissa's car disappeared down the driveway. The silence that followed felt like the calm before a particularly vicious storm.“So,” he said, turning to face the two children who now regarded him with the collective suspicion of seasoned border agents. “What should we do today?”Blake, eleven, clutched his tablet like a shield. His eyes flicked to the windows, scanning for invisible threats, shoulders hunched in perpetual readiness. The kid had the survival instincts of a nervous rabbit and the demeanor o...

43 likes 15 comments 15
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The Mirror Pact

Submitted to Contest #301

The first time Sara saw the mirror, it was nestled among the peddler’s other wares in the cart, it seemed far too fine for its surroundings, gleaming like a secret.The mage behind the cart didn’t look like much. A hunched woman in a patched cloak, her hair black hair straggling down her back and eyes so dark they seemed empty and endless. In her cart she had charms that whispered, vials that glowed, and trinkets that pulsed with magic. But it was the mirror that called to Sara.She wasn’t sure why she stopped. She’d been late to her shift at ...

18 likes 3 comments 3
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Satraps and Nightcrackle Tails

Submitted to Contest #301

"I didn't sign up for this," Sir Neville said as he sat astride his warhorse, looking at the vast forest ahead of him. "You most certainly did," Croyden said. Smoke curled from the dragon's nostrils as he regarded the knight. I stood beside my horse and regarded the two of them. Sir Neville looked dashing upon his black warhorse, blue eyes glinting through his upraised visor, while Croyden was trying his best to look menacing, but I could see the worry in his eyes. "You have to take the bad with the good," Croyden continued. "We ...

18 likes 16 comments 16
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Borrowed Time

Submitted to Contest #301

The Ashmolean Museum's marble floors gleamed under the soft gallery lights as Anna guided the group of wealthy donors through her latest acquisition: a previously unknown Caravaggio."Notice how the light creates this almost supernatural contrast," Anna said, gesturing toward the painting's shadowy background. "Caravaggio was a master of chiaroscuro, using darkness not just as absence of light, but as a presence itself."She watched their faces transform with wonder—exactly the reaction she'd hoped for. Seven years as Senior Curator had taught...

15 likes 6 comments 6
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Third Eye Roll

Submitted to Contest #301

THIRD EYE ROLL The stolen naloxone vials burned against Taala's thigh as she crouched behind Rez Clinic's dumpster. The smell of roasted piñon nuts from Old Man Yazzie's stand mixed with antiseptic. Six vials left—three for Kelsey, three for the next kid who'd OD behind the chapter house.A memory flashed: Taala at eight, grinding blue corn with Mom while the BIA notice flapped on their trailer. "Tsé nináháádzá," Mom muttered, shoving ch'íłchin into her hand. "Take the sour with the sweet.""Miss Brown." BIA Agent Wilcox's fake turquoise bolo...

13 likes 0 comments 0
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K-9’s Second Wind

Submitted to Contest #301

The steady drip, drip, dripping of the faucet is the only real thing in Nat Harper’s world. Liquid blooms into a perfect teardrop, reaches its breaking point, and free-falls into the porcelain basin below. Another will follow in its tracks, the cycle repeating for days, weeks, months on end until the world becomes a series of storms and brief respites of calm. “Nat, stay with me.” Nat looks into the tiny screen propped on the counter. Her face is reflected back: red, blotchy, and miniaturized beneath the concerned expression of her ...

13 likes 0 comments 0
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Witch, Please!

Submitted to Contest #301

Witch, Please! I only signed up for Mindfulness & Manifestation to skip gym.It was either that or three months of pretending to enjoy dodgeball with the same sophomore jocks who think deodorant is optional and “gay” is still an insult. Spoiler: I don’t dodge. I manifest. And I sure as hell don’t sweat on purpose.So when Ms. Delacourt breezed in on the first day wearing a silk kaftan and smelling like patchouli, I thought, Cool. Cult vibes. I can nap through this and maybe unlock my inner peace or whatever. I did not think, I will summon ...

12 likes 8 comments 8
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Better Luck Next Time

Submitted to Contest #301

Better Luck Next TimeBy J.A. Roggie I am Conner Artorious. Number one best explorer of all time. Ever. Period. Not that it means much these days, explorers are a dying breed. Metaphorically, sure. But also, literally. Let me explain.I was born on a small, half-forgotten planet called Earth. The year is 2073, and we’ve done what humanity does best: ruined a perfectly good thing. We turned paradise into ash. Torched our own home and then acted surprised when the fire burned us too.Earth is now a wasteland. Cracked dirt, and poisoned skies. Yo...

12 likes 6 comments 6
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Yee-haw!

Submitted to Contest #301

Clem Cattini’s ancient Buick sputters to a halt halfway across Baa Baa Bridge. Joyce Jinks smacks him on the shoulder. “I told ya to get gas!” “It’s three and a half bucks per gallon,” Clem replies. Stroking her rich blonde hair, he adds, “I’d rather spend it on you, darlin’.” “Well, you won’t get the chance if we stay on this bridge. Let’s get walkin’.” The pair pauses to look at the rushing water below and the twinkling stars. Clem puts his arm around Joyce. “Kinda romantic right here, ain’t it?” He moves to kiss her, freezing in mid-pucke...

10 likes 3 comments 3
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My New Roommate

Submitted to Contest #301

“I promise, he seems a bit strange at first, but he really is an alright guy,” my buddy Ben said to me before taking a large glug of his beer. “And the apartment, I mean what a steal, man. Queen Village is becoming one of the coolest areas in Philly.”“Right… I mean, what’s strange about him, though? I’ve had some odd roommates in the past and don’t want to get stuck in another bad situation…” I responded before sipping my beer. The crisp sour taste mixed with the slight feeling of “wrongness” drinking on a Sunday afternoon (Ben and I’s weekl...

10 likes 1 comment 1
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Ebony's School of Torture

Submitted to Contest #301

There is no question that my girlfriend Ebony is what some guys would call “a handful.” And before you think I’m some misogynistic jerk, I don’t mean it in that piggish way that guys refer to the size of a woman’s breasts. Not that Ebony’s breasts aren’t great—in fact, they’re the best pair that I’ve encountered in my thirty-seven years of well, having the awesome privilege of experiencing women’s breasts.Now I’m starting to sound like I’m obsessed with boobs when I’m honestly more of a butt guy. Okay, let’s be real. I am a fan of women’s bo...

9 likes 3 comments 3
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I Left You What You Didn't Sign Up For

Submitted to Contest #301

She is standing on the sidewalk with a suitcase, a tote bag, and an envelope. She continued to stand looking at this house. Her face didn’t show any expression. It was as if she knew how to keep her composure in a place of indecisiveness. The more she stood there looking at the house. The bigger the house appealed to be bigger and uglier. It was all in her mind. She knows what she has to do. This was just unfair after all she had been through.  What she didn’t know was that a woman was looking at her standing on the sidewalk with her su...

9 likes 4 comments 4
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the weight of choices

Submitted to Contest #301

**The Weight of Choices** The late autumn sun hung low in the sky, casting a golden hue over the small town of Maplewood. Sarah had always found solace in the quiet streets lined with maple trees; their leaves, now vibrant shades of crimson and amber, crunched delightfully beneath her feet. With every step toward Davidson Enterprises, the marketing company she had been a part of for three years, her heart grew heavier. At first, the position had seemed perfect. Sarah cherished the idea of being creative and influential, helping businesses co...

9 likes 8 comments 8
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Grand River

Submitted to Contest #301

Grand River1985 Kevin Woodward thought his life was over at sixteen, uprooting himself from the only life he knew in Atlanta. His brother had outed him to his mother, and she freaked out, then sent him to live with his dad. Kevin didn’t know his father well and hadn’t seen him since he was twelve. He was now 800 miles away from anyone he knew, on a farm in rural western Michigan that mainly grew corn. There was no time for his inexperienced father, Charles, to register him for school. Kevin wasn’t even sure his father knew how to parent at...

8 likes 0 comments 0
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