Fools

“Do I sit here? Oh, here, alright. Yeah, I’m ready. I just answer your questions? Okay, what-Live? Oh!”

The lady gave a strained smile at the god, before turning to the camera and giving a grin. Her black hair was up in a fantastic updo that swirled on top of her head. Her makeup was perfect, and she was wearing a neat white blouse and blue skirt.

“Hello, and welcome back to Talking to the Forgotten! I’m your host, Ms. Inta DaVoid!”

The crowd cheered and clapped. When they quieted down, Void continued.

“Today, we’ll be talking to a forgotten calendar god. Introducing...April, the old prank god!”

There were more cheers and clapping as the camera focused on the small god in the chair beside the host. Their hair was bright green, and they were wearing hot pink jeans splattered with paint, and a neon yellow shirt.

“April, tell me, what is it you do?”

April smiled at the camera. “Well, the only time I really do anything is on April first. You know, April fools day?”

“Of course! Now, how is it you’ve been forgotten? Everyone loves April fools!”

Now April had a strained smile. “Yes, I know. Apparently my pranks were too tame, or too much.”

“Care to give us an example?”

“Well, back in the old days, I used to put out candles when people were working. Everyone thought it was hilarious! But then things got more advanced, and light bulbs became a thing. It wasn’t as funny when I’d take those. Apparently, they’re expensive or whatever.”

“Well, that seems quite tame. Give us an example of one that went too far?”

“Well...once I caused traffic to keep everyone from work. And by the time they could drive, I popped all the tires!”

“That does seem like a lot.” Void laughed with the crowd. “That doesn’t explain why you’re forgotten, though. What’s that about?”

“Yeah...I got replaced.”

“Replaced? Why, that’s terrible! Who’s your replacement?”

April scowled. “March.”

“March? Well, that doesn’t make sense.”

“That’s what I said! But the Great Calendar said I wasn’t fit for the job! So they had to move me up to May!”

“May? Well, that’s a shame. Does anything fun happen in May?”

“Sometimes Easter,” April grumbled. “But otherwise, not much. I want April back!”

“Well, that is definitely a shame. But we’ve got a surprise for you all after the break!”

Cheery music played, and the show cut to commercials. Void sighed.

“I’m getting too old for this.” She muttered as the makeup crew rushed onto the stage.

April sat quietly in their seat. They had never been on television before, and weren't sure if they were allowed to get up.

They hadn’t really wanted to do this, but Void had said it could give them a chance to get they’re job back. April doubted it, because March was such a good April, and he would never give them their job back.

“Alright, alright,” Void said, waving a hand at the makeup crew. They scurried away.

“Live in five, four, three, two…”

Void grinned at the camera. “Welcome back! We’ve been talking with the forgotten calendar god, April. We have a special guest today. Introducing...March!”

April’s jaw dropped as March strolled onto the stage. He was a tall guy with short brown hair. He had on a green shirt and jeans-he always wore green. He was an attractive god, and April saw Void smiling at him flirtatiously.

He sat in a chair beside April, flashing a blinding grin at Void. April scowled, crossing their arms.

“March, hello!” Void said. “How are you?”

She didn’t ask how I am. April thought.

“I’m splendid, Inta-can I call you that? Thank you so much for inviting me on the show!”

He’s charming as ever. April grumbled in their mind.

“It’s no big deal, March. Now, tell us, how do you like your job as April?”

“I love it! Quite honestly, I think I’m doing an amazing job. As much as I liked March, April is so much fun!”

He’s so annoying.

“Well, do you think you deserve the job? I mean, poor April, they got moved to May.”

Can we stop talking about this?

“I definitely deserve the job. April was too scared to really prank people. And when they did, it was too much.”

“Are you telling me you aren't scared to get the job done?”

“Of course not. I’m not scared of anything!”

“I would expect as much from you,” Void laughed.

April grumbled at the two under their breath as they talked like they weren't there.

“Well, I think we definitely know who the better April is.” Void laughed. “Thank you two so much for coming!”

April gave a strained smile. “Yeah.”

“Of course!” March says.

April stands, and turns to March before pinching his arm. March yelps.

“But...but...I’m wearing green!”

April rolled their eyes, and walked off stage. March stood to follow them, but couldn’t get up.

“What-did someone prank me?” He exclaimed.

Void tried to get up, too, but couldn’t. They were both glued to their seats. April giggled at them from off stage.

“Cut the cameras!” Void called.

“We-We can’t!” One of the camera crew members said. “Something’s wrong!”

March managed to get up, though it ripped the back of his pants. But when he got up, he hit a trip wire.

A paint can fell on his head, and pink paint dripped down his shoulders. He yanked it off his head, revealing his soaked pink face and hair.

April skipped on stage, and held out a box, smiling. “Here, do you need a towel?”

March snatched the box, and pried it open. Glitter shot out, covering him, and sticking to the paint. Void, who was still stuck to her chair, looked terrified of being pranked.

April walked over to Void, and held out their hand. “Need help?”

Void muttered under her breath, and reached out to take their hand. As soon as she did, she shrieked.

“An eclectic buzzer? Seriously?” She demanded, snatching her hand away.

April laughed. “I can’t believe you fell for that!”

“Security!” Void shouted.

Four men in black police uniforms started to run onstage, but slipped, and tumbled to the ground, knocking March over, too. That made them hit another trip wire.

April pulled an umbrella out from under the chair they were sitting in, and opened it as paint rained down. Void, the security guards, and March were all soaked. Glitter came next, and stuck to all the paint. April closed the umbrella, and grinned.

“Have fun cleaning up!” They said. “Bye!”

And with that, they walked off stage.