Paying Capes Only

The last hour or so of patrol was quickly becoming Compound’s favorite. Sure, there was the whole thing about that time being when crime starts to slow down and people were, generally and statistically speaking, just a bit safer. That was good. That was great. That was basically the whole point of being a vigilante in the first place. That was absolutely one of the reasons Compound loved the last hour. Arguably even the main reason.

But, if he were to say that was the only reason, then he would be a liar. And while Compound absolutely was a liar, this was one thing he could never lie about. It would break his heart to do so.

Because, the truth is, Compound was in love. From the very bottom of his heart. Not with a person, of course. That would be too messy. No, he was in love with something far more worthy of his affections.

Compound was in love with a truck. And not just any truck. The perfect truck. Everything about it called to him. From an intricate paint job that was able to stand out even in the dark of night and show to all a beautifully idyllic circus to the engine holding more horsepower the Symposium for All Dashing and Diligent Leaders in Equestrian Rodeos for all Space that Compound was sure existed somewhere.

And Compound didn’t just love the truck for what it was, but also for what it was. For this truck was a food truck.

Compound liked to consider himself an archer of exquisite tastes, and nothing could ever top the deliciousness the could be found at Burger-Maynia.

When patrol started to wind down, Compound almost always found himself gravitating toward Burger-Maynia to end out his day. And this day would be no exception.

Compound dropped down and landed on the sidewalk. One arm and his bow were held above his head, a cable snaking out of his sleeve and up at the building above. A quick shift of his hand pressed a button on the side of the bow. The cable disconnected from the arrow in the roof and zipped back up his sleeve.

With a firm nod, Compound hung his bow over his shoulder and marched up to the truck. There wasn’t a line, so he was able to just walk right up to the window. The young man inside the truck looked down at him.

“Eugene!” Compound crowed in delight. “My man! My buddy! My guy!”

“Compound!” Eugene returned in a perfect match of Compound’s exuberance. “My dude! My guardian! My (hopefully paying) customer?”

Compound let out a soft chuckle at Eugene’s words. “Yes, I am indeed,” he promised. He slipped his hand into the pocket of his hoodie and extracted a roll of bills. He held the roll up for Eugene to see.

“Great! In that case, what can I get you?”

Compound took a moment to examine the menu painted onto the side of the truck. “I’ll do the Double-Maynia today,” he decided.

Eugene nodded and stepped over to the grill. “Would you like the Maynia-Sauce on that?”

“Is Kandy the capital of Sri Lanka?” Compound retorted.

“No,” Eugene said easily. “You’re thinking of Colombo and Sri Jayawardenepura Kotte.”

“Oh.” Compound blinked behind his dark glasses. “Maynia-Sauce is fine.”

“Coming right up.”

While Eugene worked, Compound turned to survey the area. He wasn’t really expecting to find anything, but it was a habit that Compound couldn’t and didn’t really want to break. A few folding tables had been set up in the lot off to the side of the truck. Whether it was for the next day or for the rush of people from when the bars and clubs and pubs had closed down earlier, Compound didn’t know.

What he did know was that they were almost empty now. Only one other person was even sat at a table. Unruly brown hair hung around his face. What little of it could be seen, at least. A black leather duster sat on his shoulders, buttoned up to obscure his body. The collar extended up to cover the lower half of his face.

It had been a few weeks since Compound last saw the man, but there was no way that he could ever forget him. His hand started twitching to his bow.

A bell rang beside him. Compound turned just enough to look back at the counter, though he still kept the man in his vision. Eugene slid a tray with Compound’s order onto the counter.

“That’ll be ten dollars,” Eugene said.

“Right,” Compound muttered absently. “Here.” He slid the roll of bills onto the counter and grabbed the tray. “Keep the change.”

Without waiting for a response, not that Eugene gave one beyond raising an eyebrow, Compound stalked over to the tables. He all but slammed his tray down across from the man.

“Indifference,” he greeted.

The dastardly villain didn’t respond. He didn’t even look up at Compound. He did grunt in what could have been a vague greeting, however. Or maybe he’d just been swallowing something. He picked up another fry and funneled it under the collar of his coat.

Compound cleared his throat. Indifference still didn’t say anything. The vigilante huffed and dropped his fist onto the table hard enough to send both of their trays rattling.

With a sigh, Indifference finally looked up. “Do you have to sit there?”

Compound spluttered. “What kind of- yes! I do!”

Indifference’s eyes searched Compound for a moment. “I see.” He grabbed his tray and slipped off the bench. With a sidestep, he moved to the next table over. Compound let out a squawk and vaulted over to join the vile fiend. He lost a couple fries in the move, but that was a small price to pay.

Plus, he could always get more while he was waiting for the police to pick up Indifference. Could even eat them close enough to let the guy smell them, but not give him a taste. That was probably too cruel, but also he totally deserved it.

Compound plopped down and glared at Indifference. The other guy ignored him. He picked up his half-eaten burger and lifted it to his face. Compound couldn’t resist leaning forward. In order to take a bite, the guy would have to lower his collar. He’d have to show his face.

Except apparently not? He somehow angled his burger to slide under the collar of his coat without dislodging it one bit. He took the bite and put the burger back on his tray. Compound didn’t know how he did it. He did know that it was very infuriating, however.

Indifference chewed his food and audibly swallowed it. He dropped another fry beneath his collar. Then, finally, he focused on Compound again. “Do I know you?”

Compound squawked. “Excuse me?!”

“Okay, go for it.” Indifference nodded absently toward the exit and refocused on his meal.

“Alright, that’s it.” Compound reached for his bow. He grabbed it and had just started to pull it over his head when-

“Hey!” Eugene shouted. Compound froze and looked over at him. Even Indifference’s eyes flickered over. The guy was leaning out of the window of his truck, arms crossed over his chest and a sharp glare locked on Compound and Indifference. “Behave,” Eugene chided. “Or I will institute a strict no capes policy.”

“I’m not even wearing a cape!” Compound objected.

“That’s how strict it’d be.”

Compound looked at Indifference again. “But he’s a criminal!”

“You’re both criminals,” Eugene deadpanned. He uncrossed his arm to point at Compound. His hand flicked down. “Sit. Behave.”

Beneath his dark glasses, Compound felt his eye twitching. Still, he couldn’t just disobey Eugene. He dropped back to the bench, glaring at Indifference across from him. “You tried to have me killed,” he finally said.

Indifference hummed. “Did I?”

“Yes!”

“Okay.”

Compound gave it another few seconds. When it became clear Indifference wasn’t going to continue, Compound snapped. “That’s it?”

“Yep,” Indifference replied, popping the P of the word.

“I was lucky to survive!”

“Very lucky.”

Again, Compound gave Indifference the opportunity to elaborate. “Are you seriously not going to say anything else?”

“Wasn’t planning on it.”

With a huff and a constantly twitching eye, Compound grabbed a handful of fries and shoved them into his mouth. Once he swallowed them, he leaned forward and draped his body across the table, forcing Indifference to look him in the eye. “You are unbelievable.”

“What do you want? An apology?”

“You know what? That would actually be pretty nice.”

“Okay.”

“Well?!”

“Well what?”

“Aren’t you going to apologize?”

“Nope.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t want to.”

Compound let out a sound that he couldn’t entirely place. Something like a groan or a snarl. Something with pure frustration.

“I think I hate you.”

“Good for you.”

Indifference dropped the last of his burger into his mouth. Once done with his meal, he finally looked at Compound. He pointed at Compound’s untouched food. “You gonna eat that?”

“I was planning on it!”

“Thanks,” Indifference said anyway. He slid the tray closer to him and grabbed Compound’s burger. He took a bite. And recoiled, coughing and gagging. He held the burger away as if it had personally offended him. “Onions?”

“What’s wrong with that?”

Indifference sighed and dropped the burger into a trash can. “It’s things like this that are probably why I wanted you killed.”

“Actually, I caught you red handed in the middle of a weapons smuggling ring.”

“I have no recollection of that.” Indifference dug around in his pocket. He pulled out a small tin and flicked it open, revealing several white tablets. He popped one in his mouth and then offered the tin to Compound. “Mint?”

“Not on your life,” Compound snarled. “What is it, poisoned?”

“Wintergreen, actually.” Indifference deposited the tin back into his pocket. He didn’t say anything else.

Compound huffed. “Empty office building?” he prompted. “Middle of the night? You were with the Bears? You know, the gang controlling the whole south side?”

Indifference tapped his chin through his coat. “That does sound like me,” he agreed. “But I’m pretty sure you weren’t there. Wait, are you gaslighting me? Is that what this is?”

“I’m not gaslighting you.”

“And that definitely is gaslighting. Don’t know what else I’d expect from someone who wouldn’t let me eat dinner in peace.”

“I’m not gaslighting you!” Compound shrieked. “It was a weapons smuggling ring! I walked in and you took one look at me and told the Bears to kill me! By the time I’d fought them off, you’d taken the weapons and run!” His voice grew more and more shrill with each word, to the point that he couldn’t be sure if anyone would even understand them.

Indifference just stared at Compound for a long moment. “Are you done?”

“No! I’m not done!”

Indifference sighed. “Is this gonna take very long?” Compound spluttered for an answer. Indifference nodded sagely. “Right. I’ll be right back.” He stood up and marched up to the food truck again.

Eugene passed Indifference a bottled soda, to which he responded with a wad of bills. Indifference returned to the table, unscrewing the cap and taking a deep drink. “You want some?” he offered. “It’s diet.”

“You probably poisoned it,” Compound said dryly.

‘”Suit yourself.” Indifference took another sip. He then made a show of putting the cap back on and balancing the bottle on the table. He sat down, his hands laced patiently in his lap. “Alright, you can start again.”

“Uh sir?” Eugene called out before Compound could properly get going. “Your change?”

Indifference didn’t look back. “That’s not change,” he explained. “That’s for the table.”

Compound frowned. “The tab-”

Before he could even finish his thought, Indifference jumped to his feet. He slammed his hands against the bottom of the table. His soda was launched upward. Indifference caught it as the table flipped up and smacked Compound in the face. Indifference then slammed his shoulder against the table, sending Compound to the ground.

The table landed on top of him. Compound grunted at the pain, already shifting to push it off. It sank down, very painfully crushing his ribs. His body was shoved down, digging into his bow and quiver. Because apparently dropping a table on Compound wasn’t enough, Indifference had to go and jump on it too.

With a wheezing groan, Compound managed to push the table off. He rolled over, shifting to his hands and knees. Indifference was running off into the distance, soda still clutched in his hand, making a beeline for a dark alley. Compound only had a moment to act.

He pulled his bow over his head and spun it around in one hand, the other pulling an arrow out of his quiver. He nocked the arrow, took aim in the direction of Indifference, and fired. The arrow sliced through the air. It shot in front of Indifference, striking the wall beside him. He stumbled and stopped for a moment.

Compound took that opening and ran with it. Quite literally. He jumped to his feet and sprinted down after the villain. Indifference gathered himself again and disappeared into the alley. That was fine, Compound was faster than him. He’d catch up in no time.

As he ran, he readied another arrow. He made it to the alley and skidded around the corner, bolting down it and after Indifference. He made it to the other end of the alley and spun. Compound fully expected him to turn to the side and try to run down the street. What he didn’t expect was for the guy to turn around completely, coming to a stop facing Compound.

He thrust out his soda, the lid off and top of the bottle facing Compound. In his other hand, he held a handful of white tablets.

Compound pulled the arrow back and took aim. “Don’t even think ab-”

Indifference dropped the mints into the soda. A geyser of foam and liquid shot out, splashing all over Compound. He yelped and spluttered, jumping back. His hands slipped and he lost his grip on the arrow. It shot forward, though he couldn’t see where through the soda splashing over his face.

The heartless attack finally came to an end. Compound shook his hands and wiped the soda from his glasses. He did so as quick as he possibly could, but he knew what he’d find. Sure enough, when his vision had cleared, Indifference was long gone. The arrow was stuck to a lamp across the street.

Compound poked his head out of the alley just to be safe, but no matter which way he looked he couldn’t see hide nor hair nor stupid duster of the guy.

It took him longer than he’d like to admit to stop sulking, but eventually Compound trudged his way back to Burger-Maynia. He stood in front of the window, looking up at Eugene. “Indifference started it,” he said immediately. “You saw that, right?”

Eugene didn’t answer right away. He just stared at Compound. And what a sight he made, too. Hoodie still soaked through with soda, a few strands of brown hair clinging to his forehead, and he could feel his glasses now stuck to his skin as if glued there.

“I guess I did,” Eugene agreed.

“Cool. I need to ask you for three favors.”

“I’m not telling you if he comes back,” Eugene said instantly. “Whatever weird parasocial rivalry you’ve got going on, leave me out of it.”

Compound grumbled but slumped. “Two favors, then.”

“I make no promises.”

“First, it is very important to me that you never tell anyone what happened today. Not Oriceye, not Iarumas, not Magnetism, and definitely not Oriceye.”

Silence shrouded the two of them for a moment. “I make no promises.”

“Best I’ll get,” Compound muttered. “Second: could I get a Double-Maynia?” After a moment of thought, his mouth twisted into what he could only classify as a petty snarl. “Extra onions?”