The man who forgot

‘Abort mission!” The seconds slowed down but rushed past at the same time. It was like sand slipping through your fingers, trying to hold on. The building crumpled like a piece of paper. It was like a balloon waiting to pop. It was fate. Like the building was waiting for that moment. Like it had been waiting for that its entire life.

His eyes opened, his face wet, from his eyes overflowing, he had been silently crying during his nightmare. He lay on the hard cold floor shaking with immense terror.

***

Time froze for me long before I remember, my world turned black and white. Everyone moved on. Without me. They left me. All alone. They didn’t look back. But the truth is, if i was them i wouldn’t either. I simply didn’t deserve it. I don't know why, I just know I don't.

***

His name is Franklin Walters.

He sleeps on the floor because beds are unnecessary comfort.

He doesn’t own mirrors, he thinks your actions show people who you are.

He refuses to speak his name outloud, he doesn’t like it.

He keeps himself isolated, people are temporary.

He only takes cold showers, it gives him control.

He doesn’t celebrate anything, it's stupid.

He owns chairs, but never sits.

His name is Franklin Walters.

The distinct scent hit him first. Then the firetruck sliced the silence with its screeching noise. He sensed his heartrate rising but it wasn't because of the fire. It was what was following behind. His past.

Burning. Smoke. Sirens.

He felt it but didn’t know what caused it. His body remembered before he did. He felt like he was being stabbed and someone was twisting the knife deeper. Legs aching. Throat caging his breath. He grabbed the table but his body couldn’t withstand the heaviness of his heart. He crumbled to the ground shaking. He curled his body covering his mouth and eyes with trembling hands out of shame. He wanted to cry but he was past that point. Nothing was coming out. His consciousness left his body at that moment. He shut his eyes longing to never resurface back to reality.

“Franklin, you're in the hospital, we found you passed out in your house” the nurse explained.

***

Franklin? That's my name. That’s who I am. Sergeant Walters. Service number - 417417. Call sign - echo3

***

He remembered.

As soon as he got discharged he went home apprehensive. Names he wrote on the wall. He couldn’t even remember if he did that. Who were they? Why couldn't he remember? He found a key on his bedside table. He didn’t leave the key there?

He rummaged through his house, flipping everything he saw. Trying every lock as if one of them held the truth he’d spent years running from. He got to the bedroom with no bed, teeth clattering, his heart bleeding through the tears of his eyes. The old cupboard had a locked drawer. One he didn’t realise was there. With each heavy breath, he blew more dust out of the way of the edge of the drawer. It reluctantly clicked. He tugged it but it just won’t budge as if it was guarding the answers he was looking for. After applying more force the drawer relinquished, giving up what it was hiding.

Distressed photos with burnt edges, dog tags, field notebook, a unit patch, challenger coins, and a folded flag. He had never seen any of this before. In the deep end of the drawer he discovered a mission letter.

***

Operation Operation Sweep‑26

Date:17/04/2014

Unit: Recon Team echo

Lead: Sergeant Franklin Walter

Sergeant Franklin Walter, you are overseeing Recon Team Echo during today’s sweep of Building 26 at Grid 417‑03.

The team enters through the west access point at 1400 hours. The objective is to locate and secure any evidence linked to the Sector Delta incident. Expected location: second‑floor storage rooms.

Maintain standard comms. Report findings by 1500 hours.

Extraction point: south stairwell, regroup at Checkpoint Bravo.

After‑Action Summary — Operation Sweep-26

Unit: Recon Team Echo

Lead: Sergeant Franklin Walter

Status: Mission Failure — Total Loss of Team

At 1417 hours, an unauthorised explosive device detonated inside Building 26 while Recon Team Echo was still inside.

Comms logs show a sudden spike in signal activity moments before the blast. Surveillance detected an external transmission prior to detonation.

All members of Recon Team Echo are presumed KIA.

Source of the intel leak and reason for early detonation remain unknown.

***

It was happening again. He felt it all over. Reading the letter burned a pit in his stomach. He remembered. It was him. He fed the hostile cell the intel. He was the reason his squad died. He betrayed his brothers. He was a traitor.

The nerves in his body all attacked him at once. His heart felt like it was being ripped out of his chest. He fainted.

He stumbled up. Grabbing the matches and the mission paper. He dropped it on the floor, lit a match and watched it burn.

He couldn’t handle it. It was too much. He wanted to forget. Forget it ever happened. Forget it was him.

He knew what he was doing because he knew he had dementia. He knew his brain could forget but his soul couldn’t.

The truth is

He sleeps on the floor, beds are for people who deserve rest.

He doesn’t own mirrors, he can’t face the man that survived when they didn’t

He refuses to speak his name outloud, that was the last thing he heard on the radio

He keeps himself isolated, people remind him of the man he used to be, the one he can’t forgive

He only takes cold showers, he doesn’t deserve comfort

He doesn’t celebrate anything, it’s disrespectful to the men that died

He owns chairs for his men that never made it back.

A mistake that will be remembered for eternity.

He's been punishing himself the entire time because no one's been doing it for him.

***

Years passed, he had been punishing himself subconsciously the entire time but at least he forgot. One day, when he was cleaning his attic. He uncovered more photographs and letters.

The drawer wasn’t his only stash.

It was happening again.