Yellow Bubble

All Ida ever saw was yellow. The sky, the pavement even the cats were all yellow. Nothing was spared from her rare condition. She remembers the day, the yellow doctor approached her parents to tell them of the way their daughter viewed the world. In all the different shades of yellow. Honey yellow, mustard yellow, gold yellow……. An endless line of a single color.

She heard of green, and blue. She heard people saying how sorry they were, whenever Ida told them of her condition. How she’s missing out on all the beautiful colors there is. But in truth Ida didn’t mind. How can she feel sad for losing what she never had? If she never saw black, how can she ever miss it? Her mind couldn’t think of other colors, and that idea never made sense to Ida. So, she lived in the shadows of yellow.

“How are you feeling Ida?” May asked leaning on the flower patterned door frame. “Like always. Want some tea? There’s orange juice too.” Ida said. As she slumped into her yellow bean bag chair. She wasn’t sure if it was actually yellow or just her seeing it that way. “come on, you have to be at least a little excited. Today your life will change.” she said as she raised her hands and stared into the ceiling with the most serene smile Ida had ever saw on her face. “And no thank you I’m late for work. Just wanted to check on you first.” May continued. Her very voice seemed to be ringing with excitement. True, Ida should at least feel something. If the eye surgery goes well, she will start seeing the other colors. The ones she was never able to comprehend. “I’ve been meaning to ask, how does the apartment look? You are always babbling about color’s harmony or whatever that is.” She said, trying to change the topic. If there was something more annoying than walking behind a slow walker to Ida, then it would be talking about colors. Such an irksome topic it was. May took a single glance around before she spoke again. “It’s not bad. Certainly not as bad as when you go shopping alone.”

Ida loved shopping, whimsical cat bracelets, sweaters with giant mushrooms printed all over, crocheted flower hats, cups shaped like frogs. Even the smell of new shirts was enough to fill her brain with a large dose of dopamine. Everything was beautifully and painfully worth it, she couldn’t buy them all. And certainly not with May swinging her head rapidly from left to right whenever she picked something, the colors dong go well together, that’s too bright, that one doesn’t go with your skin tone. You can’t mix purple and brown, it’s hideous. HIDOUSE? It was in simple words, enraging. And it was not just May. Everyone was the same. Life was beautiful in yellow, but others made it agonizing for her instead. If only they could see what she saw. “Alright I really have to go now, I will see you tonight, yeah.” May winked and left, her yellow dress fluttering behind her. She shut the door, Clank.

And Ida was left alone in her own world. Her butter colored cat climbed into her lab and started to purr, satisfied at the gentle pats Ida was giving. But she was not able to ignore the pit that was growing in her stomach. Her breath was shallow and she forced herself to take a few deep breaths. And threw her head back. Everything is possible these days, Ida. It’s a simple surgery. You needn’t worry at all. Once you see properly. You would think, why I haven’t done it sooner. The bald doctor’s chuckles was still ringing in her ears when she fell asleep. But what no one knew was what had such a tight grip on her was not the surgery, but what came after.

When she woke up, she knew it was time. She nursed herself back and forth before she got up with heavy steps towards the kitchen to force some water down, her tongue was like cloth in her mouth. When she washed her face, the girl gazing back at her was the same color as an onion. But how would I even know they are the same? She thought. Every second leading to her appointment was agony. Pure dread filled her lungs and her oxygen level felt dangerously low. Dear lord. She started fantasizing about what ifs. What if she got the time wrong and her surgery would be rescheduled, god, please. But no, that wasn’t possible she had checked the date and time a million times. What if she broke a leg on her way, or got hit by a car. Maybe if the doctor gets hit by a car? Anything to postpone that appointment. A piano falls from one of the windows and her mother will sadly call the doctor, to tell him Ida wouldn’t be able to make it, because she had unfortunately died. The earth would open beneath her and she gets dragged into hell, because she ignored one of those religious posts once. And she would live happily ever after in a yellow colored hell.

Her head was spinning by the time she laid down on the blue operating table. The cold made its way into her bones, her teeth were chattering uncontrollably. “Calm down now, it will all take a few minutes.” The doctor was humming as he spoke. Like what he was doing was nothing more than a daily routine in his life, like he was only brushing his teeth. Not prying her eyes open and force her to see all of those other things that would turn her world upside down and around. The anesthesia given to her made its way through the IV tube into her veins. Her arms tingled but she was instantly relaxed. The thoughts were flying away from her mind one by one. She was warmed like a freshly baked cinnamon bun in winter. She was awake. She knew she was awake, but it was all a blur. She thought this is what it must have felt like when her mother rocked baby Ida into sleep. A warm, soft embrace drifted Ida into far away memories.

A lemon colored sea, beneath a lemon colored sky. With a blazing hot sun above her. Ida was content. But not her parents nor her friends seemed to be. All of those colors Ida, they are endless. We want you to see it too. She never understood why they were telling her all of those thing. What was the point? You can see it, I can’t. Why did they have to tease her about it too? Wasn’t being in her own yellow bubble enough? She didn’t want to know about anything other than yellow, because in truth, Ida was scared. She was scared of the way she knew this surgery would change her, and her life would never be the same again. So, she delayed and delayed. Until she gathered enough courage to face the inevitable, the inevitable change that you can never hide from.

So, she decided to do it. She was twenty-seven now, and tired of running. If change was inevitable, Ida liked to face it with shaky legs, rather than wait for it to catch her off guard. She would want for it to be her own decision. And so she made the appointment.

She jolted awake, and instinctively her hands drifted to her eyes. Heavy bandages covered them, so not a single glimpse of light could go through. She remembers when they helped her into a softer, more comfortable bed. But she couldn’t know how long it had been since then. Her chest ached with pain, and her stomach was threatening to empty itself right then and there as she took off the bandages, layer by layer. Slowly, as not to startle her own shivering mind. Light seeped through her eyelids. A deep breath, then open.

Her breath turned into a quick short breaths, so overwhelmingly beautiful. That was the only way Ida could describe it later, when her mind wasn’t so over loaded with the vast number of colors. Her sweater was not yellow, she couldn’t tell what color it was then but later found out it was the one called orange, like the fruit. She ran to the window with shaky legs, and found a whole ocean of colors. It was too much so she closed her eyes and drifted downwards, to hug her knees. She wept and thought, she should have done it sooner.