The Fog Lake Ferox

Regina Penman, the secretary of the ARC Arthurian Readers Club, blew in through the door of Malory Tennyson’s Cloudbank Cabin for Arthurian Studies, accompanied by a flurry of leaves. She pushed the door shut with her hip and stood leaning against it to get her breath back.

“So, the climate is still not so ‘Camelot Perfect All the Year’. The wind was never like this in the past!” she observed.

“We call it the Fog Lake Ferox” said Little Plump Jo, who was the current Artisan in Residence in Cloudbank Cabin. “They say we have only had winds this strong since The Glitch happened.”

Regina sat down in a comfy tub chair and deposited two baskets on the floor beside her. “I come bearing gifts and wearing three hats” she said. “Well, not literally! I could not have even kept one hat on my head in that wind!”

“Potty Pot of Tea?” prompted Sensual Dabrowski one of Jo’s five canine writing companions, whispering in Jo’s ear.

“Would you like a cup of tea or coffee?” Jo offered.

“A cup of herbal tea of some sort would be good, thank you. I have brought us some cinnamon buns to go with it.”

“What are the three hats?” Jo asked.

“Beware the Greeks when they bring gifts, my husband, the history buff, always says!” laughed Regina. “Firstly, here is a gift to wish you a very Happy Christmas. You can open it now or put it under the tree if you prefer. And here are gifts and loans of books from my Arthur, the dear man. They are all about archaeological digs and ancient manuscripts. I guess you will probably be more interested in the book I am giving you for Christmas which is a newly released version of the legends based on the Morte d’Arthur by Sir Thomas Malory. Oops, spoiler alert.”

Intellectual Dabrowski, the Border Collie writing companion, immediately started to rummage through the pile of books, giving excited little yips. Regina regarded him with amusement.

“Secondly, I have come to offer you an apology and just check how you are feeling after the incident with Mimosa Minipas.”

There was an awkward silence. Both of them knew, or suspected, that the other knew about the unique character of Malory Tennyson and his Cloudbank Cabin for Arthurian Studies, but it had never been discussed openly. If they did not actually share the same understanding that the fictional Malory Tennyson and the characters from the legends of King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table could communicate with people via dogs, one or other or both of them would sound quite insane if they mentioned it.

“Oh, that was over a month ago now. I have almost forgotten about it,” said Jo trying for a neutral comment “although I doubt whether Mimosa has forgotten her midnight dash though the forest.”

“I know” said Regina. “She was babbling about being chased by fairies!”

Maybe Regina thought that Mimosa Minipas had been hallucinating and was just concerned that her behaviour must have seemed odd and been frightening to Jo.

But then Regina showed her hand. “I am afraid I have lost Malory Tennyson’s favour by allowing Mimosa to go to Cloudbank Cabin and even suggesting that she show Malory her illustrations of a pink haired Lancelot fairy!” she said.

And Jo was quick to respond. “No, definitely not! It was only when Malory knew that you were coming that he calmed down and all the crazy stuff stopped happening.”

“I am so relieved!” Regina said with a sigh and a smile. “It was actually my dear Arthur who suggested her prize should be the stay at Cloudbank Cabin. Hers was the only entry in the Manga and Graphic Novel section of The ARC Arthurian Readers Club’ competition this year. In the past the winner of that section has received either an introduction to a literary agent who deals with that type of fiction or even, in a couple of cases, an introduction to an animation studio. But really Mimosa’s work is not worthy of either of those. So Arthur said ‘Send her to the Funny Farm for a week. I tried to let you know she was coming by sending the email.”

“Yes, I did try to warn her that Malory would not be happy about her depicting his favorite character as a pink haired, blue eyed fairy with darling little wings! She was assuming that Malory Tennyson was a real person, who was a patron of the arts, and would introduce her to a publisher. But her yappy little dog, Champion Something-Something Floosabelle could hear his tantrum and was really terrified!

“It is so good to be able to talk to someone who really understands about Malory and Cloudbank Cabin. I don’t even try to talk about it with my Arthur. He knows that the ARC handles the Artisan in Residence applications for Cloudbank Cabin; but as President of the ARC he is more concerned with scholarly research into Arthurian studies and leaves the secretarial stuff to me.

If I say, ‘Sir Lancelot would say such and such’ he says, ‘that’s nice dear, but you do realize that Lancelot was probably not one Arthur’s original warriors.’ And then he burbles on at great length about the possible literary development of the character. And he brings out more books about archaeological digs and old manuscripts. I have not even tried to tell him about Malory Tennyson.”

“Do you think he would be jealous?” asked Jo.

“Why should he be?”

“Well, Malory thinks of you as His Regina, his beautiful golden queen. And he considers that you are the Guinevere to his Lancelot; and that he must love you with a courtly love pure and chaste from afar.”

“Goodness! Really? I did not know that!” said Regina going quite pink in the cheeks. “I admit I do love bringing the dogs up to the Cabin for walkies and talking to him about how the Arthurian reenactments are going in the Fog Lake. At least my Arthur has less to worry about than King Arthur. Malory and I are not even in the same realities as each other! What do you think about the relationship between Lancelot and Guinevere? Is it strictly platonic or is it a steamy romance? Have you seen any signs one way or the other?”

“Well, I know that they have had The Moment – the Love at First Sight Moment in this iteration of the enactments. Malory pointed it out to me, when it happened. I really do not know if they have taken it any further. But the courtiers and the tavern folk all gossip about it, as if it is an open secret and the Scandal Sheets news is always full of it. There has never been even a hint of it in the Proclamation Parchments news. ”But they just seem right for each other, if you know what I mean.”

“For the last month” Jo continued, “I have been presenting stories about the Fog Lake for the entertainment of the court and the tavern folk, here in Cloudbank Cabin, as part of a writing challenge I undertook in which I was to write 50,000 words during the month. And it was really difficult telling the characters the stories I had written about them, as distinct from just doing the writing without them knowing what I was writing! I had to be so careful to be diplomatic, not to sound judgmental and not to state or imply a firm opinion about the truth or otherwise of rumors. But I needed to acknowledge that the rumors existed because many characters’ actions were based on them.”

“And at times it felt as if I was on trial myself – as if maybe I had somehow caused The Glitch in the Fog Lake which is giving us all this unsettled weather like the Fog Lake Ferox wind. The listeners all had opinions about the cause. Some thought that Our Elaine, the former Elaine the Fair, Elaine the Lovely, the Lily Maid of Astolat had caused The Glitch by transitioning to Lady Charlotte-Elaine, Lady of Shalott and entrepreneur owner of Charlotte’s Web Weaving. And that would have been my fault because it happened under the watch of my writing.”

“That sounds like a very challenging exercise in tact and diplomatic wording!” said Regina. “It also brings me to the third reason for my visit. The ARC Arthurian Readers Club handles the bookings for Cloudbank Cabin, and I want to know what plans you have for next year. Would you like to extend your residency for another term?”

“I would like to extend if that is a possibility. Do I need to give you another proposal about the work I will do?”

Regina laughed. “My dear Arthur would say ‘Publish! She needs to publish!’ If Cloudbank Cabin is going to retain its reputation for valuable additions to Arthuriana, the Artisans must be expected to publish high standard well researched works.”

“Oh dear!” sighed Jo.

“Well what have you done so far? Do you have any books close to being published?”

“I have written two books and I am half way through another. That one will be about King Arthur’s twelve glorious wars; but I am really struggling with the research for that one. It is not for lack of reference material. Intellectual keeps on bringing me piles of that. But I am not very enthusiastic about reading it. I would prefer to tell the stories of the legends as written in the Morte d’Arthur and Idylls of the King. And I think Malory would prefer that too, because Intellectual is always arguing with him about which characters are originals and which place is the site of each battle.”

“And I have written about forty short stories. And now I have another book half-way to completion about changing roles within society in the three most recent iterations of the Fog Lake retellings which grew out of the challenge month writing.”

“So are any of those books, particularly the first two nearly ready to be published?” asked Regina.

“I did think they were” said Little Plump Jo with a big sigh. “But the more I learn, the more unready I feel. Everything feels either too difficult or too expensive. And Intellectual Dabrowski says things like ‘And, with all due respect, do you even think it is worth finishing? I mean, do these books contribute anything of substance? Do they make any significant addition to the wealth of already existing Arthurian fiction? Do they have sufficient merit to even be worthy of publishing?’

“And I am getting older, Regina. I really do not know how long it will take to get anything to the level of being ready for publication. How long do you think I would be allowed to stay?”

Regina laughed again. “You really do not have to worry! You can stay as long as you like (within reason). They say T.H. White stayed here for twenty years! I will just write it up that you are continuing to write a series and will pursue publication when appropriate. So here is a journal and calendar for you. I will see you in the new year. It is so good to have somebody I can really talk to about the Fog Lake. Have a wonderful Christmas! I will go now and brave The Fog Lake Ferox again!