Forgetting

That didn’t happen. That couldn’t have happened. Are you sure? That doesn’t sound like me? I don’t know where I was on that date. Was I read my Miranda rights? Oh, ok. What’s your name again? And you’re not my attorney. Do I have an attorney? I’m telling you I know myself. That’s not something I would’ve done. Can I see the video. When? I’m telling you that didn’t happen.

Do you have any DNA, fingerprints, EtC.? I didn’t think so. Humans are the least reliable form of evidence. Was the person who witnessed it white or black? But I’ve learned in school that… I went to college. I already told you that? Is this being recorded? You told me that already, too? Maybe I do need an attorney then. Where was I on March 15? I don’t know. I don’t remember. What’s today’s date? OK Can I use my right to remain silent? Which agency are you with? Right. Of course I’ve heard of you. Can I have a pen and paper and gloves? because if I did do it and I’m not saying I did, I don’t want you getting my fingerprints. What’s my attorney’s name again? why don’t I have an attorney? Can I call somebody to get an attorney? Should I call my family? I did? Should I wait for them to come to give me advice? I don’t think I have Alzheimer’s. I think I have something else. Did I get my medication? Maybe the medication would help me answer your questions better. I did. What time is it? Who are you again?

*

They’re trying to get a confession out of me and I don’t know what happens but I can think better now that I’ve got my medication. I know it’s Friday now but I’m not sure where it was 3 weeks ago. I think I have an attorney now they’re still in prison. I’ve never been in prison before the food is terrible. It’s cafeteria food. You have to take group showers but the thing with soap is bullshit; meaning it isn’t true.

But I don’t know where I was, even on my meds. Fuck. Where was I? I talked to my attorney. I think. Did I talk to my attorney? Deep breaths. Maybe hypnosis or meditation would help? When we relax supposedly our brains work better. Wonder if there’s any medical things or pills that could help me remember. I think I’m already on them. But I am married and they do have kids and they must be worried sick about me. I think I’ve already called them. Need to remember to use my words to remain silent and ask to talk to an attorney.

*

Over a roommate and managed to do him and thankfully he’s not interested in me and it’s not that I have anything against queers is that I don’t wanna get AIDS not that all care I’ve made but it’s common in jail. What did I do or what are they accusing me of doing? I forget.

It’s starting what it’s starting. It’s usually sudden, but suddenly I can feel it. My hypothermia is itching. That’s bad. Then I’m other me. Good maybe they’ll….

^

What happened? Fuck, I’m in jail. Motherfucker. What’d I do. Maybe ask a guard? “Hey, what’d I do? How come I’m in this cage?” The guard says I’ve asked him this question twenty times, so he’s not answering it again. The other gal got the answer and she don’t even know about me. What’d I do? What’d she do? That doesn’t sound like her or me. We got an attorney. One from the state or did the parents fork up money this time? In prison, there’s time to think and slow things. Should’ve gotten a fucking degree in lock picking. Motherfucker. That was dumb. Oh well. Start pounding the bricks and find the loose one. Not the pavement; pavement ain’t got no holes, but bricks have an Achilles’ heel. When the bastards are busy. Or night shift. Whichever. Remember the singer: “I believe I can fly” or fall well. “A cat always lands on its feet” and she has a pussy. Police and prison guards don’t got much smarts. 2 year degree. Son-of-a-bitch. Every fighter has his heel. So does every building and school and so does every cop.

Got outta detention. This is gonna be a synch. What did Houdini have that I ain’t. Now when I get out, I get to the basement, fuck up the supports and all the prisoners be running. Running where, who cares? It’s easy to catch one prisoner going in one direction but a hundred in different directions, they’ll need backup. Wait, damn it. I’m switching back.

^

It didn’t happen. Nothing happened and if it did, I didn’t do it and I’m not a teenager. Wait. I must’ve fell asleep or maybe I forgot or forgot my meds or something. What time is it? Who’s in charge of meds? Who’s in charge? It’s what time? My memory sucks.

There’s no video, right? Wait, what’s happening? Must be an earthquake or something. Cracks in wall; weird. Wait, there are prisoners in every direction. Look out my window and nothing’s happening outside. An internal earthquake? I yell for help. The guards ignore me since I repeat myself. So, I do what they taught me in karate and yell FIRE. The bastards still ignore me. The ceiling tilts like a bookshelf put together by college students who don’t read instructions. Fuck.

Other prisoners start screaming and the guards finally come. They look like a squirrel in the headlights. The guards get together, open our cells and herd us to the yard. All the prisoners have guns pointed at their heads. We go outside and watch our prison implode. Good news? Bad news? Is the dining room still there? The bathrooms? Showers? What’ll they do to us or with us? We’re going to another prison if they have room for us.