Just A Sweet Little Story

I was sitting with my back against the wall just outside my hotel room. I felt humiliated. Not only had I dramatically stormed off from a work dinner, but I had also forgotten my room key on the table. And since I was already crying I had no choice but to wait until I could be sure all my co-workers had left before finding some way to get my key back.

And the most embarrassing part of me storming off in front of my co-workers is that it really wasn’t anything anyone said, I was just so over-sensitized and overwhelmed. Lacey, our team leader, had been talking about everyone’s level of professionalism and was eyeing me (or so I thought) when she talked about socializing with other branches of our company while we’re here at this convention. And, I mean, I guess I didn’t storm off but as soon as she wrapped up her speech I took the opportunity to brusquely excuse myself from the table. Maybe it was in my head but I felt like everyone was shocked and dumbfounded. But I just couldn’t go another minute being around people, I needed to find refuge in my hotel room, ideally beneath a mountain of blankets watching 'Pride and Prejudice' or maybe a baking show.

So I returned to my room only to realize that I had, in fact, left my room key downstairs. And there I sat, quietly crying, hoping some brilliant plan of retrieval would sneak its way into my head.

But then, I heard the elevator ding and instinctually hid my face on my knees. I just hoped whoever was getting out didn’t notice the strange woman sitting by her hotel room door.

“Hey Margaret, you left your key downstairs.”

I looked up, mortified and a little relieved to see Matthew, my coworker, squatting down in front of me.

I took the key from him hesitantly and mumbled what sounded like the croak of a frog but was supposed to be a thank you.

I wanted to preserve my dignity but was instead so tired that I just put my head back down on my knees where it’d been before. Without saying anything, Matthew sat on my right with his back against the hallway wall just a few inches away. He let out a big sigh and asked,

“What’s gotcha down?”

“Nothing, I’m perfectly fine.” I said from my self-enclosed shelter.

“You know, for some reason I’m not buying that right now.” His voice lifted like he’d phrased it as a question.

I looked up and over at him and then I guess I felt comfortable enough, or maybe tired enough, that I just let it all fly. “I knew I’d be a failure on this trip. I never should have come in the first place. I’m too annoying and my clothes are too baggy and I don’t eat like everyone else and I don’t socialize enough and I don’t even know how to get my own Uber and I can’t sleep because I hate not having my own pillow…”

“Wow,” He paused. “Yeah, you’re right. You’ve got real problems.” He shook his head and raised his eyebrows. “There’s nothing you can do. But hey, at least you’re aware.”

I gave him a death stare.

He covered his mouth with his hand and tried not to laugh.

“And I’m too tall and too big. People don’t like giant humans who are too… giant.”

“Man, you are right, there’s no hope for you.” He laughed.

“Come on, this is how I feel!” I threw my hands on the floor like a literal child. Gosh I was so embarrassing.

“No, no of course” he consoled, “I completely understand everything you’re saying. It’s all valid, you’re just… funny. That’s all. You can’t help it.”

I just looked forward and gave a hopeless sigh.

“People like you, Margaret. Whether you are aware of it or not, we all like you.”

I rolled my eyes and sniffed disgustingly. “Sure.”

“You know, seeing you like this is actually quite helpful for me. I used to think you were some Alien-human hybrid. I thought there was no way I could ever be intelligent or confident enough to talk to you. Like I’d literally need God’s intervention or something. You were a little scary.”

I gave him a look.

“But I mean, now I get to see that you’re actually human like the rest of us. You don’t seem quite so untouchable now. I can actually talk to you now.”

I looked at him bewildered. “No one would ever want to talk to me.”

He looked down at his hands in his lap. “I would.”

I made a skeptical face. “You would?”

He looked up and smiled straight ahead. “Yeah, you’re funny and smart and really wise. Self assured.” He looked down then turned his head toward me. “And I don’t mind that you’re tall. Guys kinda like giants who wear baggy clothes. Trust me. It makes you different.”

“Well and I know that. I know I have a lot to offer but I just hide it all the time. No one will ever see that there’s more to me.” I whined like, again, a literal child.

“I can see it.”

He was smiling so kindly at me.

I said tearily, “But I look like the Michelin Man.”

He laughed and put his hands over his face then eventually looked at me seriously. “I am telling you right now, there is nothing more attractive than a female version of the Michelin Man.” I laughed. “I’m serious, when I was fifteen that was literally all I wanted— a female Michelin Man. And I couldn’t find her! And now here you are. What are the chances.”

Gosh, he was so nice. Which made me go back to crying a little more.

He put his arm around me and said, “Margaret, you are a very kind, caring, smart person and the whole team is lucky to have you.” I leaned my head onto his shoulder and he wrapped his other hand around me and set his chin on my head. “You don’t have to believe me, but you are very attractive and strong and you have all my respect.”

We stayed there for a couple minutes and then he let go of his hold on my shoulder. I wiped my eyes and cleared my throat.

“You ready to go face the world?” My eyes widened out of fear. He looked a little panic-stricken and said hastily, “I’m just kidding, you can face the world another day.”

“Okay.” I said, or rather, croaked.

He stood up and reached out his hands to mine. I let him pull me up to stand.

I was so embarrassed but I thanked him.

“Anytime, Margaret. You go in and get some rest and then I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

“Yeah.” I whispered.

I scanned the key, let the door unlock and pushed it open. I turned around just inside my room.

“Thank you, Matthew, for sitting with me.”

He put his hands in his pockets. “You’re welcome, Margaret. And hey, if you…” He paused. “Never mind, now’s not the time.” He turned and started to walk away, then caught himself and turned back to me. “Actually, no. You can say no to this or let me know later, but after the meeting with the team tomorrow do you want to grab some dinner?”

“Ah.” I was a little shocked and hesitant. My thoughts were a jumbled mess and I couldn’t seem to think straight.

“There’s no pressure, you can take your time.” He started to walk away and I just felt it rise up—

“Matthew.” He stopped and turned. “Yes, I do.”

He was beaming at me and then he nodded, turned and walked to the elevator hands still in his pockets.