Teething Troubles

The hypnotised woman’s footsteps thudded on the stairs like a child’s as they trudged to detention.

Agilauf Blaug smiled. The time had come; Dexter was about to take his next step toward becoming a feared night-stalker. Agi had kept the lad safe and fed, but now Dexter had to fend for himself. It was like any parent and child: you want to keep them safe under your bat wing, but at some point, you have to let go. With one hand raised like a puppeteer, black nails sharp enough to cut glass, he guided the woman up the next floor.

On the way down the stairs, Agi and Dexter’s next-door neighbours, Teddy and Margot, appeared. Teddy was babbling, while Margot had a glazed look in her eyes. ‘…and the support band, man, you’re gonna love them. Hedgehogs Versus Martians, or HVM as us fans call ’em. They blur the lines between tech-goth-doom and progressive-crust-funk. I think I’m almost as excited to see them as I am to see Toilet King. Or am I?’ Teddy shook his hands like an animated toddler. ‘Gosh, I hope they play songs from their “Flushed” album!’

Agi nodded at the couple as they passed on the stairs. They were the perfect neighbours. Teddy always had “music” on, which helped cover the sounds he and Dexter made at dinnertime. Margot had a constant somewhere-else expression. She never paid much attention. ‘Teddy. Margot. This is, ah—’ What was a modern female name? ‘Sighilde,’ he said, with a smile and a nod.

Teddy nodded but continued to ramble. Margot and “Sighilde” grunted at one another like zombies. The couple rounded the corner and disappeared, Teddy’s voice echoing for a few more seconds. ‘—of course, most of the genre is written in Locrian using the natural minor. But Toilet King use the harmonic minor instead, which creates this kind of—’

Agi guided “Sighilde” up the final flight of stairs to the door with the mat that said ‘WELCOME’. Using “Sighilde”, he knocked on the door with their secret knock.

The door creaked open to a dank, dim apartment. Boards covered every window. Standing in the doorway was a young, pale man with wide eyes and a big smile. ‘Agi!’ said Dexter, opening his arms.

Most sires got their progeny to call them that: ‘Sire’. But that always felt too impersonal to Agi. They’d drunk each other’s blood for Satan’s sake; couldn’t they use first names? ‘Good evening, young Master Dexter. Dinner is served, my lad.’

The lad clapped his hands, stepped aside, and allowed him to enter, ushering in both Agi and their food.

Agi walked “Sighilde” into the TV room where they ate – the lad had turned him onto watching trash TV while eating. He shut the door and turned to the lad and announced, ‘Normally, I prepare the food, boy. But the time has come for you to earn your wings. This is a very special moment. Now, go in there and drain her until she is empty, my lad!’

Dexter brightened up and shook his hands. But there had been a tiny hint of uncertainty flashing in his eyes. ‘Y-Yes, Agi! I’ll just put something on.’

Agi gave a confused grin. Youngsters were always worried about their clothes. Back in the old days, you’d get a familiar to wash the bloodstains out. Laundry was difficult back when washing machines and detergents weren’t a thing. That, or you’d take the clothes of your victims. Sometimes, they had good stuff.

The boy disappeared into his room, then emerged holding a bag.

Unusual, but every bloodsucker had their own approach. With a bemused smile, Agi gestured towards the closed door. ‘All yours, boy.’

Dexter closed the door, and shortly, the sounds of the television filled the apartment.

Agi smirked. The lad felt embarrassed and didn’t want his sire to hear his first attempt. Soon, Dexter would hunt with the best of them. Agi sat at the kitchen table, ready to recapture the woman if Dexter needed backup.

Five minutes passed.

Ten.

Half an hour.

An hour.

An hour and a half.

Agi frowned. What was taking him so long? Was everything okay in there? He didn’t want to interrupt, but now, paranoid thoughts were fluttering around his mind’s attic. He’d hypnotised her, but sometimes strong-willed people could break free. What if she’d awoken? What if she’d hurt him to escape? Or splintered the coffee table and taken a shard and—

Agi leapt to his feet and ran for the lounge, bursting through the door with a bang.

Dexter looked up, inches away from the screen, beaming at him. Sitting behind him on the sofa, weeping, was the still-hypnotised “Sighilde”. ‘We just finished “Grave of the Fireflies”,’ Dexter said, grinning. ‘Next up, “Requiem for a Dream”! If that doesn’t drain her, then I don’t know what will.’

Agi sighed. The boy was adorable, but hardly a natural vampire. Most of Agi’s progeny took to unlife like a bat to the midnight skies. Some, like Dexter, needed more guidance. The Elders said a vamp should survive solo after a month, or their sire should leave them for the sun. But Agi had softened. Dexter was too likeable. Agi rubbed his eyes. ‘Dexter… That’s not what I meant.’

Dexter tilted his head. The lad looked at him like a puppy trying to understand the given command despite its lack of brains. “Sighilde” continued to stare at the TV, the screen reflected in her tears.

But was this Dexter’s fault? A mother cat brings her kittens prey in various stages of aliveness, easing them into the hunt. Agi realised he needed to ease Dexter in, too.

Agi darted forward, and with a swipe of his hand, he punctured “Sighilde”’s stomach, seized her spine, and snapped it.

The spell broke, and “Sighilde” fell from the sofa to the floor, blood frothing from her mouth. She made a keening sound that wasn’t quite a scream. Coppery perfume percolated throughout the room, undercut by the animalistic odours of guts. “Sighilde” groped at the rug, trying to pull herself along like Bishop after the Queen’s attack at the end of ‘Aliens’.

Agi’s own teeth twitched at the sight and the smell, and he had more self-control than the boy. Yes, this was the way to do it. Agi nudged Dexter forward. ‘Go on, my boy! She’s getting away! Get her, get her!’

Like a kitten chasing a ball of string, Dexter pounced.