Paper Cuts

Paper Cuts

Spend some minutes reading the extract below. Then in a minimum of 1000 words to a maximum of 3000 words, explain how this writer uses language to convey the emotions of the characters.

Spent the first five minutes of this stupid test

Looking outside, thinking that looks the best

Would rather be out there getting inspo from the homies

Than cooped up in here with all these zombie nobodies

Didn’t wanna sit English language – parents chose it for me

Tryna concentrate but the girls in short shorts getting me horny

Lost another five minutes telling the trouser snake go back to sleep

Only another 900 words man, til I can leave this flock of sheep

“Study the language” they said, knowing how much I like words

But I don’t like reading, I’d rather just be heard

They said they jus’ tryna make me employable

But I learned all the words the English stole is deplorable

I’m meant to admire the author’s use of repetition

When in my opinion they should be making reparations

To Germany, Denmark, Netherlands

And prob a bunch of other places before Trump gets a hold of ‘em

Mister invigilator looks serious, seriously suicidal

Maybe cuz he’s the PE teacher with all these desks in his gym ya’ll

See what I did right there

Called onomatopoeia

Or wait maybe I meant enjambement

(Or maybe no-one cares what I meant)

I aint enjoying writing with a pen and paper

Why not bring back fax and give us pagers

Honestly I could say so much more if I could just f*cking dictate

But they turned this into some prehistoric state

Now Maddy has to stretch and I see her belly piercing winking

Am I honestly expected to do any thinking

These conditions are tortuous

But they say it’s the syllabus

And mister invigilator says we’ve got an hour to go

I could maybe go quicker if they found me some snow

I’ll let you into a secret – it sure helped with revision

But it’s left me scatty now…oh look, there’s a pigeon

Lucky birds, getting to fly around in the air

Mocking me sitting here, giving me the stare

They said no keyboards cuz the clicking is distracting

Said nothing about our feathered friends all cooing and scratching

The bossman pacing up and down between the aisles

While I try to remember sh*t about syntax and styles

Looking at our papers, doing all this hovering

Keys jangling in his pockets – can he be more bothering?

Hope I don’t grow up to be like him

Belly getting round and distinct lack of chin

Shuffling around like a wild caged animal

I’d rather swim the entire English channel

Spread my good word to other nations

Like them English did with colonisation

There’s reason in my rhyme

There’s thought behind my crime

I’ll outsmart the grammar police

When I smile I’ll bare my teeth

Then my tongue will deliver lashings

Vocal chords will come crashing

I take a look at the clock on the wall

The roundest whitest face in this hall

The hands say there’s still a whole half hour

Before I get to go home and have a shower

No, not just due to my dirty thoughts

There’s no air con here and tempers are fraught

I think more allowance should be made

When the country in a heatwave

Like why not move exams to winter months

Give us kids a chance to info dump

Instead of my brains melting outta my bum

Don’t wanna pack heat, wanna pack a Magnum

Okay that above verse “needs work”

My pa would say the same of me, cuz he’s a jerk

(Forgive me for stumbling and crying

Gotta find my feet before I go flying)

Let me try to think what else I learnt

Before we all tossed outside to get burnt

The medium is the message, read me?

But Kayleigh’s peeping label says Double E

Maybe I’ll try reading the text that they gave us

(Like printing off more trees is the thing that’ll save us)

Oh yes, now I see. Very strong imagery and similes

Impactful metaphors, flow goes swimmingly

At least that’s what some bro on YouTube said I should say

When I lit up a blunt last night and pressed play

I liked, commented, followed and subbed the scribe

But that was then, when I get home I’m sayin’ bye

Got too many other issues playing on my mind

Like how I want my bars to unite humankind

Hell like I’m gonna click watch on a deep dive

On 19th century content – that’s not my vibe

Check out Jasper gesturing for more paper

Could that guy’s geekery get any greater?

Or maybe he just using it to draw titties

Closest he’s eve gonna get to real p*ssy

My boy Lil Nate is sat behind me coughing a lung

A cold is about the only thing he good at catching on

Surprised they didn’t put him in quarantine

Or at least around him build some screens

When we get outta here we gonna blow off some steam

But first pay a visit to the pharmacy queen

Cuz I don’t wanna puff puff pass

With someone sounding like they next breath is they last

Need an extension for this test

But don’t need to bother for the rest

(Yes I’m talking about my penis –

Gotta spell it out for the so called genius)

Ten minutes left mister invigilator says

Ten minutes to put this essay question to bed

Ten minutes to wrap up this rap

Ten minutes and I can finally go for a crap

Wonder how I’ll be graded

In time no-one’ll care, it’ll be faded

But right now, did I convey enough emotion?

Gimme feedback, gimme slack, gimme all your devotion

Don’t just judge me on my penmanship

Have we not now built a relationship?

I know you wanna finish marking, go out and play

So do the right thing, gimme a f*cken A :)