Of Power and Promise

This is my happy place. The spot here, in front of the big bay window in the family room of this old house. I love to watch the birds as they fly through the trees. The red and brown and black and blue of their beautiful feathers swirling in the air as they chase each other playfully.

Oh, how it must feel to be so free. One of my favorite things is being out there with them, pretending that I am also free. Running and jumping into the air, attempting to capture one. Just for fun of course.

Click clack click clack. Alyssa’s footsteps, getting closer. With a stretch and a twirl I jump down from the maroon colored cushion in front of the window, and onto my feet.

“Alina,” she calls out as she approaches the family room. “There you are. Look, Daniel is coming to dinner tonight. You are welcome to join us if you want, but you have to keep the weirdness to a minimum. Okay?”

I know my sister loves me, and our family. She just isn’t as excepting of the magic pulsing through our veins. It’s hard for her, feeling like she doesn’t belong in the mundane world, and trying so desperately to fit into it.

This, all too evident to me as I stand here, face to face with her. She is wearing some of the most trendy things from her closet. A bright blue mini dress over a long sleeve button up shirt and a completely unnecessary belt wrapped around her waist, displaying an over sized belt buckle. A striking difference to my all black attire that screams ‘witch’.

“Okay Alyssa,” I respond, as nonchalantly as I can manage. “I will just stay out of your way. I don’t really understand though. Sooner or later, he’s going to find out.”

“Shut up before you jinx me!” she snaps back.

“All I’m saying is that magic is a part of you, it’s a part of all of us. If you have any chance of a future with this guy then he should know. And if he loves you then it shouldn’t matter.”

“Stop it Alina! You know how I feel about this stuff. Why can’t you just support me and let me find my own happiness? It’s my life, and if I want to live like the mundane, well, that should be my choice. And if you love me then it shouldn’t matter.”

Her comment hit me hard, as if she had slapped me with it. She has a point. I love my sister and always will, no matter how she chooses to spend her life. I just wish that she could see the power within her as beautiful, instead of ugly. I wish that she could fall in love with her own magic.

I also wish that she could see that everyone practices magic, even the mundanes. Yes, even them with their rituals of eating the body and drinking the blood. The sacrifices they give to their offering trays. Even the ‘lucky socks’ they wear when there’s a big game. As if they aren’t summoning entities and casting spells themselves. A rose by any other name, right?

I wish they could all see the many ways that they are like us. Maybe then the hypocritical stares and pointing as they whisper to each other about what monsters we are, maybe it would all stop. Maybe then, my sister wouldn’t reject her lineage. Maybe.

I shake the thoughts from my mind and finally respond to Alyssa, “You’re right, you’re completely right. I love you, and I know I have to respect your decisions. I think I’ll just run out and grab dinner by myself tonight. You know, so, you and Daniel can have some privacy.”

A smile spreads across Alyssa’s face, her eyes widening. “Oh, thank you, thank you,” she cheers, wrapping her arms around me and squeezing so tight that, for a moment, I can’t breathe. When she finally lets go, all I can do, while trying to hide how disappointed I am in her disapproval of herself, and me, is smile back at her.

Alyssa starts to make her way out of the room, but when she reaches the doorway, she stops and turns to me. “Oh, and by the way,” she says, “can you also do something about that obnoxious cat of yours? She’s always getting in my way, knocking things over and getting fur everywhere.

“And I don’t know if you’ve noticed,” she continues, “but that cat always disappears when you’re around. I’m really starting to think she doesn’t like you.”

I spend nearly three hours roaming around the neighborhood. Sitting in the grass, looking up at the stars. Strolling across the Robinson’s front porch. Catching a glimpse of them in front of their fireplace, her with a book and him with a glass of scotch, before I jump over the railing and climb to the first branch of a large tree. All just trying to kill time.

I don’t want to ruin my sister’s dinner, I think to myself, somewhat sarcastically. So I decide to stay in the tree overlooking our family’s Victorian home.

But not more than five minutes pass before I hear the slam of our heavy double doors. It’s so loud that it causes me to jump and almost fall from the tree. I turn to see Daniel, nearly sprinting down the stairs and through the gate of the wrought iron fence. Then he jumps into his gray Toyota Corolla and speeds away.

I make sure he’s gone before I jump from the tree, landing on two feet. Running to the house. What could have happened?

I run through the front door and down the long hall to find Alyssa sitting at the dining table, her head in her arms, sobbing. I sit in the chair next to her. With my hand on her shoulder, I ask, “Are you okay?”

Alyssa’s head snaps up from the table. She pulls away from me, her eyes bloodshot. Makeup running down her cheeks. “Do I look okay?” she says, her voice cracking.

“Everything was perfect. The food was perfect, the wine was perfect, we were perfect. And then I sneezed! And can I just sneeze like a normal person? No! It lit every damn candle in the dining room!” Alyssa is yelling now.

She glares at me with eyes that penetrate my soul. “This is your fault!” she screams. “I knew you were going to jinx me. Why don’t you want me to be happy?” Her words cut through me like a machete cutting down a tree. She must know that’s not true.

She slams her hands down and jumps up from the table, her chair flying into the wall behind her and exploding into a thousand splinters. The lights start to flicker. “Why did this have to happen in front of him? I’ve never seen anyone so terrified in my life. This is a curse!” she screams as three windows shatter, one after another, glass flying across the room.

I cover my face with my hands seconds before a piece of glass flies straight at me, cutting into my wrist. She has to stop. I turn to her, my arms stretched out in front of me, my hands forming a sigil that Mother had taught me.

Things are in the air now. Things that don’t belong there. The plates, the silverware, the sword that usually hangs on the wall.

A single word flows from my lips, like water from a pitcher, “Dimorta.” And with a loud bang that shakes the whole house, everything comes crashing down onto the floor. Including Alyssa.

When Alyssa comes to, she is lying on the sofa in the family room, me in the chair across from her. She sits up, holding her head, trying to stop her brain from pounding through her skull. I can see the remorse in her eyes.

This isn’t the first time something like this has happened. Alyssa, upset about her gifts, would have an episode where she couldn’t control her magic. There was always damage left behind, physical and emotional. But Alyssa would apologize and we would all move on as if nothing had happened.

But that was then. Mother and the elders would always tiptoe around Alyssa, afraid to set her off, afraid to push her too hard, afraid of losing her. But they are gone now, it’s just us, and I’m not afraid anymore.

“This ends now.” I declare to her. “You are a grown witch, not a witchling who can go around throwing temper tantrums. Look at this house.” I spin around with my arms outstretched, pointing to the broken pictures and disheveled furniture.

“But,” Alyssa started.

“No!” I cut her off. “This resentment you are holding onto is going to hurt someone, or worse. Alyssa, you have to learn to control your power or you will lose yourself to it.

“These episodes are not going to stop on their own, and no one is coming to save you from them. This anger is building up inside of you, dying to break out. And one way or another, it will break out.”

Alyssa is staring at me blankly.

“It’s time to face your gifts. No more running.” I stand up, walk over to the wall behind me and wave my hand over it in an arching motion, revealing a door my sister has never seen.

“Come on,” I say, reaching my hand out to her. “I want to show you something.”

Alyssa puts her hand in mine and rises to her feet, a stunned look on her face. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her lost for words, until now.

I walk through the unopened door, pulling my sister through with me. We emerge on the other side, into a large room where books and bottles fill the shelves that line the walls. The shelves climbing the whole twelve feet to the ceiling.

In the center of the room is a solid oak desk. Hand crafted by our great great grandfather and passed down through the family. I slide my hand across the desk, tracing the wood grain with my fingertips as Alyssa trys to take it all in, her jaw almost on the floor.

“This is the apothecary.” I tell her as I grab the quill pen from it’s holster on the desk. “This is where our ancestors crafted potions and cast spells. It’s where Mother and Grandmother taught me everything they could.” I say, drawing a heart in the air and blowing it to Alyssa where it lands on her forehead. She rolls her eyes and I put the pen back in it’s stand.

“It’s where they hid during the witch trials, and where they gathered to fight for our freedom.” I wave my hand over a vase that is holding a bouquet of dead roses. Alyssa seeming slightly more intrigued as they spring back to life.

“But everyone is still afraid of us.” she says, turning away from me. “We will never truly be free.”

“People fear what they don’t understand. And lashing out only confirms their fear.” I say to her as Mother had once said to me. “Our ancestors fought to create a path for us. One that it is now time to begin walking. We must show the mundanes that there is nothing to fear.

“We must make them see that we aren’t evil, that we are people too. That we were created by the same force that created them. And that we are good. It’s our destiny to transmute that fear into love. And maybe, do some really cool stuff along the way.” I say taking her hands into my own. “Can I show you something else?”

“I guess.” she says, softening a bit.

I take a few steps back, close my eyes and inhale deeply. A sharp gust of wind cuts through the room causing papers to fly off the shelves as I spin around and jump into the air. I land on the desk in the middle of the room, look up at my sister and say, “Meow.”

Alyssa nearly jumps out of her skin as she shouts, “You’re the cat?” She can hardly believe it as she examines me. Running her hand through my shiny black coat and looking into my big yellow eyes. I let out a purr and rub against her arm before I leap from the desk.

Landing on the floor on two feet, I turn to her and say, “Yes, I’m the cat.”

“B-But that’s advanced magic,” Alyssa says stuttering. “How can you do that?”

“Mother was a seer.” I tell her. “She knew what was coming. She knew that she would be taken from us. So she vowed to teach us everything she knew. You were supposed to start your training before me, since you are older.

“But, she could also see the anger within you, and knew that you would reject the lessons. So she, and Grandmother, taught me everything they could. Including things that witches usually learn much later in life.

“They started my training very young. I was only four when I learned simple things like closing doors and lighting candles. And by the time I was 15, Mother taught me how to put you to sleep during one of your episodes.

“They knew this day would come. The day when you would finally stop fighting fate. The day that I would start your training.”

“Why did I have to be so childish?” Alyssa says, a tear running down her face. “I miss them so much. And all I did while they were alive was push them away. How can I live with myself?”

“My sweet sister,” I say, wiping the tear from her cheek. “Mother is still alive. She is waiting for us.”

Alyssa looks straight into my eyes, obviously confused by what I had just said. “What? How?”

“It’s a long story, and you have a lot to learn. Shall we begin?”

I watch as the look on my sister’s face turns from confusion to determination. She takes a deep breath and in the most steady voice I’ve ever heard, she says, “Teach me everything you know.”