The Warning Triangle

The loud crackle from my little red Mini car sounded electrical. I was on my own and although I didn’t exactly panic, I came close. I saw a driveway on my right so pulled and turned off the engine. When my shaking stopped, I undid my seat belt, got out of the car and locked it. I crunched up the long, gravelled drive and rang the bell on one of two houses at the far end. After explaining to the old gentleman who opened the door what had happened, I asked to use his telephone to call the AA.

Looking over my head he mumbled, “I’ve got to find something.” I stood there desperate to contact someone as he closed his front door, wandered to a junk-filled garage and started rummaging. Wishing I’d chosen the other house, I heard, “Aha” as he found his collapsible warning triangle. As he tried to erect it, I asked, “Please may I phone the AA whilst you’re doing that?”

“No. You must watch.”

Eventually he positioned the sides of the triangle then unsuccessfully adjusted the legs several times. Frustrated, I said, “It doesn’t have to be perfect. Please can I make the call?”

“Not yet.”

Finally the triangle stood on his sloping path. He picked it up then meandered towards my vehicle. I followed and as we walked he said, “You can’t leave your car there. It’s blocking the drive.”

“I can’t start it. It might catch fire.”

“Cars can be pushed.”

“I won’t be able to push it.”

Reaching my car, the old guy said, “This’ll warn other drivers.” as he walked a short distance behind.

I wondered what he was doing but couldn’t believe my eyes as he stopped, put the triangle down, then took ages more as he readjusted the legs for the level road. By this time I was feeling frantic about never getting home again. Also, not having had any response to my comment about pushing the car, I prayed he wouldn’t expect me to do it.

An eternity later he came back and held out his hand saying, “The key?” I obliged without thinking. Opening the driver’s door he pushed my Mini a few yards forward. With his drive unblocked he stopped, left the key in the car door and returned to his house saying as he went, “Don’t forget to bring back my triangle.”

I said, “Of course.” as I re-locked my car and followed him. I didn’t realise I’d been holding my breath but now exhaled, at last I’d be able to phone the AA.

He’d locked himself out.

“I’ll go round the back.”

I stood on his driveway, feeling like a lemon but managed to bottle the tears. Finally, after what felt like at least an hour later he opened the front door. Inside, a staircase led upwards. An old woman sat in an armchair on one side of a TV blaring out a game show. I was too stressed to recognise what was on but the old lady turned it off when her husband signalled to her.

Then he asked me, “Do you know who to call?”

“Yes. The Luton AA depot.”

“Do you know the correct code?”

“I’m not sure.”

He looked around. A second armchair near to a coffee table was opposite the old woman. I saw a booklet on the table titled Telephone Dialling Codes and asked, “Is that what you’re looking for?”

Without acknowledging my input, he picked up the book then slowly started checking it. Frustrated, I knew he was trying to help, but he was taking so long.

Finally he found the code then, as he passed me a battered landline phone, my little old knight in shining armour asked, “Do you know where you are?”

I started saying what I knew of the area. He shook his head, cutting me short with a precise description, stating numbers of yards distance from this landmark and that garage. I suggested, “When asked, can I hand you the phone?”

He nodded. I tried the number several times. It was constantly engaged but when I suggested, “Could I try a different depot?”

I got the response, “No. Keep on with that one a bit longer.”

Eventually I got through and noticed the satisfied look on the old man’s face.

After explaining my concerns with my Mini, I handed the receiver over as arranged. The old man started by recounting details about what had happened. When at last he hung up he said, “They’re sending someone round but it might take a while. You can’t stay here though. Remember to bring back my triangle.”

I nodded, then concerned asked, “Can I please call my daughters to let them know what’s happened?”

The old lady tutted at her husband, replying, “You go ahead love. You can’t have them worrying about you.”

Gratefully I phoned home. My ex-husband, Tony was there. When I told him what had happened he offered to come to see if there was anything he could do.

I replied, “Yes please.”

“OK. Where are you?”

“Where am I? Hang on.”

Looking questioningly at my old knight, his armour glowed a bit when he nodded and held his hand. I explained to Tony that my host would tell him the location and duly handed the receiver over. I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard the quavery voice repeating everything again.

Eventually he hung up and I asked, “Can I pay you for the calls?”

Waving his hand sideways, he shook his head then added, “Remember to bring back my triangle.”

I hoped I didn’t sound too frustrated when I replied, “Of course I will.”

By now I was bursting to go to the loo so asked, “Could I please use your toilet?”

The old lady pointed to the staircase. “Up there. Second on the right.”

Once physically comfortable and relieved that now I was no longer at the mercy of this awkward gentleman trying to be helpful, I went back down the stairs. The front door was open and the old man was coming up the path. Thanking the elderly lady I said goodbye then my eyes widened in horror as I quietly freaked on reaching the doorway and seeing Tony’s car drive off. Had he been sent away?

The old man reached me saying, “He was blocking my drive too. Now he’s in front of your car.” Then, in case I hadn’t heard him before, he added, “Remember to bring back my triangle.”

I reassured him yet again and heard him repeating it almost as a litany, until eventually he reached his front door and went inside.

At the roadside I gave Tony my car key. After checking and finding nothing, he said, “I’ll take it for a test drive.” He got in and drove off.

When he returned, parking opposite the driveway, I ran over. “Did you find anything?”

“No. Where were you when you heard the noise?”

I showed him where I’d been when I heard the crackle. Tony went to look, then returned carrying a large broken and twisted branch. “Did your car do this?”

As he waved the twig at me, my eyes widened, my mouth dropped open in disbelief. The laughter bubbled out of me in waves until I was crying.

Still laughing, Tony dropped the stick back in the kerb, got back into his car and drove off. Of course that was when the AA patrolman arrived. Thankfully he saw the funny side as I explained what had happened.

Then I walked back up the pathway, left the triangle by the front door, got back in my car and finally went home.