The Ladder

Once upon a time, there was an old man…no, that’s not right. Once upon a time there was a young man…or was it a teenager? Could it have been a child? I just can’t seem to recall.

How’s this? Once upon a time, there was a being, a special being I might add. What made this being so special?

He traveled the world near and far. He wasn’t a hero; slaying beasts and saving fair maidens. He didn’t travel sharing good news, nor did he spread the gospel. He wasn’t even in a band.

No, this being traveled the world with a ladder, thirty feet or so, and a sign that read, Climb and You Shall Find.

For centuries, he’d prop the ladder against a structure; building, mountain, anything would do. Then he’d set up his sign, and read as he sat on his stool.

Naturally, people grew curious, inquiring about the sign and ladder. Those who watched from a far would only hear faint whispers from the being and individual before watching the person ascend the ladder, and never come down.

Most assumed it was a trick, an allusion of sorts. The ladder seemingly had an end. They saw it themselves as the ladder was placed. Surely at some point the person had to turn around. Yet, they never did.

Eventually after some time, the being would take up his ladder and sign, and walk away; leaving those who witnessed the climb baffled; studying the structure which the ladder rested on.

***

However, I’m afraid this story is just a tale. Let’s turn our attention to another story. The story of David. No, not the valiant king from the Bible, but David Pointer.

A twenty-eight year old man living in a charming apartment complex where the local residents spend their days arguing with absolutely no one in the halls, or raiding his pitiful pantry; leaving behind enough pellets to start the next Bubonic Plague.

***

One morning, David dragged himself to that same pantry. His guest fled as the pantry doors parted, and he grabbed his favorite cereal.

As he poured the chocolate cereal, he realized two things. One, he was out of milk, two he didn’t purchase chocolate cereal.

David dropped his head on the dining room table and let out a deep sigh. You see, David has something we like to call, depression. Rightfully so. He’s twenty-eight, has no wife or kids, was previously fired from a corporation he so desperately wanted to be part of, and he is prematurely balding.

“No, I’m not,” David yelled at the innocent narrator. David… “I’m not balding, okay, Mr. Narrator. I-I-I wore my gaming headset too tight, and-and now it’s a little thin at the top. I…just need a little break is all.”

Are you done David? I don’t have all day.

“Yeah…and why does the narrator always have a British accent?” David asked. Did he prefer a Baltimore accent? “Carry on,” David said.

With nothing to do, and bills piling to the ceiling, David did what any sane adult would in his situation…he went to the Renaissance Festival.

***

After stuffing his face with a turkey leg, meat pies(yes plural), and pecan turtles, David wandered the grounds aimlessly. He ducked under men with stilts, weaved between jugglers, and bumped into a man swallowing a sword… medics say he should make a full recovery.

With only a dollar left, David wondered what more he could do. After scoping the area, he noticed a sign in the back corner of the event. Climb and You Shall Find.

Intrigued, David approached an old man reading a newspaper, and watched as a woman ascended to the top.

David cleared his throat. The old man peered from the paper with fiery eyes. David gulped. The old man returned his gaze back to the paper, stroked his matted beard, and chuckled at the cartoons.

“So,” David said. “How much—”

“Free of charge,” the old man hissed. Davis scratched his lank hair before swinging his arms back and forward. The man lowered the paper and raised his brow.

“Waiting for the lady to come down,” David said.

“No need, she won’t,” the old man said. David chuckled.

“Well, what exactly is up there?” the old man licked his thumb and turned the paper.

“Whatever you desire,” he said adjusting his top hat. A vague explanation indeed, but David placed his hand on the ladder.

The old man stopped his ascension with his cane.

“Think about what you truly desire. Climb, but you must realize there is no turning back, and you will give up a year of your life. Climb as many times as you’d like.” David’s eyes danced around.

“Riiiiiight,” David said.

And so, David climbed. Thirty feet, thinking of all the things he so desperately desired from life. A good job, wife, kids, and a full head of hair.

***

When David reached the top of the ladder, he was shocked to find he was right back where he started, but instead of an old man reading away in a chair, there was a younger man, doom scrolling on his phone.

“Some optical illusion,” David said with glee. “Where’s the old guy?” he asked. The man looked at the back of his hand and shrugged.

“Lot of climbs today,” he said.

“Sure,” David said. David walked away. In the short amount of time he was gone, the festival seemed to have changed drastically. Booths had shifted, and the man swallowing the sword was back at it as if nothing happened at all.

As David traversed the unfamiliar grounds, he bumped into a woman. Instead of choking on a blade, she choked on Figgy pudding.

David performed the heimlich and apologized as the chocolate projected from her throat. He was lost on a voyage at see as he looked into her blue eyes. Her cheek bones filled with blood as she introduced herself as Elise.

***

A year passed, and our loser actually did it.

“Hey,” David said. He had a full head of hair, married Elise, and her father took him on as his apprentice, where he now has a six figure salary at an industrial corporation. Also, Elise stomached him enough to have two twin boys.

David got all he wanted out of life, but he found himself wanting more. A bigger house, a baby girl, a business of his own. David just wasn’t satisfied.

***

David and Elise planned an outing to the Renaissance Festival. Rather than taking a pleasant stroll with his wife and kids, and enjoy all of what the festival had to offer, David told Elise to give him a minute as he, Used the restroom.

So, after abandoning the family he begged for…

“Whose side are you on?” David asked. David raced all the way to the back of the festival.

There he was. The young man, the ladder, and the sign.

David rushed to the ladder and placed his hand on it. The young man, twenty or so, placed the cane on the ladder.

“You know the rules, but this time, three years will be taken from your life,”

“Huh?” David shrieked.

“If you can huh, you can hear. Climb or not, it’s up to you.” The young man went back to scrolling in his phone. David bit his lower lip, exhaled, and raced to the top.

When David reached the top, he was back where he started. A teenager slouched in the chair playing video games. David looked at his phone. May 17, 2030.

***

David rushed back to his family. His twin babies were toddlers, Elise had a baby bump the size of a melon, and a sinister glare carved into her face.

“Elise, I—”

“Can we go now? Why do we have to do this every year?” she asked. David nodded.

***

Another year went by for our ladder climbing addict.

“Seriously, and I’m not an a—” Elise gave birth to a baby girl, but lost her father. However the family business was left in the hands of…David. As CEO, he purchased a mansion, and got a tiny French bulldog that seemed to be allergic to existence itself.

I know what your thinking, David has it all. The money, the beautiful ginger, three healthy kids. What more could he possibly…

***

“Global expansion of the business, an island for the family, and I don’t know…a hobby I’m really good at,” David said. The teen slouched in the chair and waved David off as he played his game. Before David could climb, he stopped him.

“This time, ten,” the teen said with the crack of the voice. David’s hand dropped slowly as he looked into his fiery eyes.

“Ten? Years?” David asked. That’s a heck of a jump. Can—”

“You don’t need to climb,” the teen said before returning to his game. David paced in a circle. He pulled at his full head of hair. He let out a deep breath and rushed up the ladder.

The teen sighed and shook his head.

***

When David looked down the ladder, there was only darkness. He kept ascending until he reached the top and was back where he started.

When he turned his attention to the chair, the teen was gone, but a little boy ran in circles playing with a toy plane. David pulled out his phone. His reflection revealed an older gentleman. Hair sprinkled with grays, exaggerated laugh lines, and teeth stripped of enamel.

He turned on the phone. May 17, 2040.

***

When David returned to the festival, his wife and kids were nowhere to be found. A stretch limo awaited his return, and took him back to his castle of a home. However, it didn’t take our pitiful friend long to realize, that his house was not a home.

David lived in a house full of strangers, two he brought into the world and one he proclaimed to be the love of his life.

“Hold on, hold on! Brush up on your math bozo, I’ve got three kids,” David assumed. “Assumed?”… His teenage boys Fred, and Ted(remarkably creative names),stayed into trouble. Poor lads desperately cried out for their fathers attention, and turned to delinquency to do so.

His daughter, Molly devoted all of her time into social media, and his estranged wife had quite the…bond with her tennis coach Pierre.

“You’d tell me if Elise was cheating…wouldn’t you?” David asked. “Yeah I asked…just forget it.” Oh David, you only know the half of it.

***

After a few days of his modern day skinning. David found himself back at the empty festival grounds. He raced to the back and found the small boy hoisting the ladder over one shoulder, and the sign on the other.

“Hey! Hey! Hey!” David rushed to cut the small boy off…alone…in an empty lot.

“Don’t make it sound weird,” David said.

“Oh, it’s you,” the child said.

“Yeah it’s me, and I’m gonna need you to set that ladder back up pronto,” David said.

“No,” The boy tried to step past David, but he cut him off.

“You said I could climb as many times as I wanted”—David pulled at his hair— “I-I didn’t ask for this, to be miserable. I—”

“Got exactly what you wanted, David.” The boy said. “You were never satisfied with what you had. Always chasing. Ascending the ladder only to realize it was leaning against the wrong wall.” David dropped to his knees.

The boy walked past him with the ladder and sign until David grabbed his tiny ankle.

“And I realize that now. I do. I just want to start over,” David said. The boy sighed.

“There is no starting over, David. You can only ascend. For centuries, it has been people like you who have kept me in existence. Trading their life force for a shot at their life’s wishes come true. There was even a woman who wished to be reunited with her dead husband. She climbed, slipped in the process…and well, she got her wish.

None of them never needed me to do that, in fact I played no part. With each climb, the younger I get. Another climb would spell my demise, and I am quite selfish.” The boy put down the sign to pat David on the back. “I suggest you make the most of what you have.”

David curled himself into the fetal position and started to sob. I suppose that’s it. The tale of a feeble minded man, chasing aspirations rather than making the most of the life he had. There are no do overs, no second chances, no miraculous coincidences of saving a nepo baby from choking on a chocolate dessert.

The End

…What’s this? The boy is returning to…it can’t be…he doesn’t…

***

The boy towered over David as he laid in the dirt. He nudged him with hid foot and gestured for him to follow with his head.

David jumped to his feet and followed. He propped the ladder against the side of a building, and folded his arms.

“I don’t usually do this, but it turns out I’m too short to drive,” he said. Overjoyed David tried to hug him. He swiftly pulled out a switch blade, causing him to stop in his tracks.

“I’ll be taking thirteen years back from you. The first climb is yours, but you are to never ascend again. Understand?” the boy asked.

“Yes, oh yes, never,” David said. The boy rolled his eyes and stepped aside. When David tried to climb, the boy grabbed him by his pants leg.

“No. Eyes on me, and climb down.”

“But, how?”

“You don’t have to you know,” the boy said. David thought back to the day of his first climb, shut his eyes and climbed down the ladder.

***

When David opened his eyes he was at the bottom of the ladder. The young man stood with his arms folded as David inspected himself. He took up the ladder, his sign, and off he walked into the distance.

David frantically searched his trousers for his phone. The reflection revealed a twenty-eight year old BALDING man.

“Who cares,” David said as he rushed into the festival. There he bumped into an, oddly familiar young lady with ginger hair and blue eyes.

As be relieved her from her choking, David stared her into her soul. Her cheeks filled with red and she pulled a strand of hair behind her ear. David took her by the hands.

“Elise, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I-I know I messed up with you and the kids, but I’m all yours baby.” Eyes widened to the point of no return, Elise thanked David for saving her and swiftly walked away.

David slapped his forehead, and realized he had never met this woman a day in his life, and now he was destined to be alone, poor, and bald for the rest of his pitiful existence.

“Yeah, well at least I have you narrator man. Turkey leg?” David asked. Lead the way.

The End…I suppose, or perhaps, just the beginning