The Narcissist

It was four in the morning and blissfully quiet save for the gentle hum of the car engine in the empty parking lot. Hailey pulled out her phone camera to apply lip gloss and check for any lingering traces of fear.

A car pulled in, then, right under the streetlight on the other side of the parking lot. It was gleaming, perfectly clean and crisp, the star of the show. Her father’s. Hailey glanced at the coffee shop. The lights were dark. Good.

She took a breath.

A car door slammed before she was ready, making her flinch in her seat. She grabbed her bag and work uniform quickly, jumping out of the car and locking it before he had the chance to stride over to her side of the lot.

She’ll be safe once she’s behind the coffee shop doors.

His face was blotchy and red, as if he’d been embarrassed in front of his coworkers. He stalked forward, a beer belly pushing against his shirt.

Hailey stood by her car as if it offered her protection, keeping her facial expression controlled and blank.

She looked at his hands. Empty.

“You think you can just walk away from me like that?” he said, approaching close enough to her face that she could make out the faint wrinkles on his forehead. She squeezed her nails into her hands as tears welled up in her eyes.

“I had to go to work,” she said, checking the time on her phone. 3:55AM.

“Bullshit,” he says, stepping forward. She stepped back and felt the car door against her spine. “I can pull you right out of this job if I wanted.”

“No, you can’t,” she says, suddenly irritated. “I do my job well, unlike you.”

“You’re selfish–all you do is spend that money on yourself–don’t look at me like that, I’m not the villain here,” he said, his gray eyes filled with disgust that made her cringe.

“Can’t we talk about this at home? You’re causing a scene,” she said, scanning the parking lot for more cars.

“Everyone at work loves me, Hailey,” he argued, waving his hands in the air. “They all agree that there’s something wrong with you,” he said, clenching his white fists and jabbing a finger in her face. For a second, she wondered if he was going to hit her.

It would be a relief if he did.

“I’m trying to stay out of it,” she said, her voice taking on a whine, making her cheeks flush from the childishness of the sound. “I buy my own food, I drive myself, I do everything by myself. What more do you want from me?”

“You’re just like your mother,” he spits out. “Why are you so angry all the time?”

Hailey gawked at him, feeling deja vu. “Don’t you remember the things you did?”

He threw his hands up into the air. “All I do is go to work and provide for my family. There’s nothing wrong with me. It’s all in your heads,” he said, looping his finger in circles near his head, his eyes wide with accusation.

“Look, I have to go to work,” Hailey said, moving to sidestep around him.

He blocked her path, standing over her with his chest theatrically puffed out. “I’m going to go in there and pull you from that job of yours. You aren’t fit to work.”

The dam broke, then, and a single tear fell down her face. Her hands wouldn’t stop shaking. “Please stop,” she said, finally.

“Me?” he exclaimed, pointing to his chest. “You need to stop. You and your mother are acting like a bunch of lunatics.”

“I just want to go to work,” she said weakly, glancing at the door, only a few feet away, but so far.

He stared at her, glaring, waiting for, probably, an apology. He curses at her one more time before stepping a foot away. She rushed to the door and slipped inside, firmly locking it behind her. Doors don’t open for customers until six.

“You can’t do this forever, Hailey,” he called after her, rapping on the door, a ghost that wasn’t dead. She turned around and ignored him, fumbling with her apron strings as she tied it to her waist.

She watched him linger outside out of the corner of her eye until another car pulled into the parking lot. Dread crawled over her like a spider as she watched her manager get out of the car and her father approach.

Maybe she could convince her manager to let her stay for just a few weeks more, until school starts again and she doesn't have to worry about groceries anymore.

She busied herself with setting up the coffees and donuts in the meantime, rehearsing her plea for innocence, the last shred of hope she could aspire towards. A few minutes later, the store manager walked in.

“Hailey,” he said, and she said a silent prayer to herself. She wiped her clammy hands on her apron and plastered a smile on.

“Yes?”

“I met your dad outside the parking lot.”

“Oh?” she asked, her smile twitching from the strain.

“He’s such a nice guy, told me how proud he is of you holding down this job,” he said casually, and her brain rerouted, snagging on the confusion of which reality she was in.

“Yeah, yeah,” she said, a little too fast to be believable. “He’s…great.”

“Next time he comes around I’ll give him a free coffee,” he said, then frowned, looking at her face. “Are you okay? You look a little flushed.”

“Oh, you know the heat of these ovens,” Hailey said, waving her hand like a fan. “It gets so hot in here.”

“Well, if you ever need to step outside, you can after rush hour.”

Hailey nodded. “Thanks.”

The manager went to the back, leaving her alone with the coffees and donuts and a splintering mind. For a split second, she entertained the idea that maybe what happened wasn’t real. She’s tired, and she misinterpreted it. He had a valid reason to be angry. She stormed out, leaving him no choice but to follow her to work.

She looked out the windows. The car is gone, for now. She pressed a hand to her chest, feeling her heart beating fast. He didn’t do anything wrong. Families yell all the time.

So why is her body in fight or flight mode right now?

She chose to ignore it and focus on the tasks she has to complete before the shop opens up. Slapping her cheeks lightly, she got to work.

As the sun rose over the sky, the coffee shop brightened and so did her mood. She greeted her customers with genuine smiles, delighted to see her regulars.

“Your parents must have raised you well,” a customer remarked. “You’re such a diligent worker.”

Hailey smiled easily, glancing towards the windows again.

“They must have,” she said absently, and a sudden urge to flee washed over her, but she fought it.

The customer left and she tightened her nails into fists to stay in reality. She couldn’t remember why she felt so uneasy. Something happened this morning, but she couldn’t remember what it was.

It must have been nothing.