Just One Last Thing

"Just one last thing," She thought to herself as she looked at the Notes app on her phone. One last item on her lengthy to do list for the summer. One last thing before the summer ends. Tomorrow, in fact.

Tomorrow starts the new school year. On Friday she had recieved the list of incoming 4th graders that had been assigned to her class, which she has dutifully ignored. She has also avoided the email from administration this evening, cheerfully welcoming the teachers back for another year. A friendly, yet piercing reminder of what tomorrow is. No, those emails can wait until the morning with a fresh cup of coffee at her desk.

Summer was, for all intents and purposes, over. It had come and gone, feeling so vast in the beginning; now here on the other end it feels trivial. And yet, arguably the most important thing on her list, she saved for last. What an idiotic thing to do.

The problem with summer break is how easy it is to get so caught up in taking care of what couldn't have been done during the school year. The wedding scrapbook that she bought all the supplies for 3 years ago that she keeps meaning to put together. Oil change, tire rotation, getting brakes checked. Doctor's visits and finally getting that root canal done. Don't forget those old family photos she told her grandmother last year that she would scan online and return soon. Or was that 2 years ago? Then there is cleaning the couch. With four furry animals, it's insane how the couch starts to smell like dog over time. A good once over with the steam cleaner should do the trick. But now that the steam cleaner is out, maybe she should also clean the armchair. As well as the office chairs. What about their mattress that her husband sweats upon every night? Yes, there's that too.

Furthermore, there is the unexpected emergencies that arise. The dog accidentally eats a sago palm seed and is on his death bed for two weeks as they wean him back to life. Her best friend's infant son accidentally falls out of their arms, causing a small skull fracture and a brain bleed. Thankfully, he will make a full recovery, but she willingly went to petsit while the parents were in the hospital overnight.

To be fair, the summer wasn't all negative. She also had fun. A lot of fun, actually. Maybe too much fun, like that one night out where her brother-in-law was their designated driver. The beach trip with her college friend group, where they ate and laughed together. That blistering Saturday left her peeling for a week, but it was well worth it. There was also quality time with her husband, like taking their dog on walks, which is the dog's absolute favorite past time. Spending time with her grandmother, learning and writing down her top recipes so the whole family can enjoy them when she is longer there. She also listened to 8 audiobooks as well as countless podcasts while cleaning the house, as there is never enough time for any of those during the school year. And you can't forget Schlitterbaun with the family, that just happens to coincide with the 13-year-old brother's birthday. However, he is now of the age that it was not his real birthday party. The "friends only" party is his real birthday party, of course.

Also, because she just can't help it, she had spent some time planning for the next school year. She had kept an ongoing list of ideas and changes during the year to deal with over the summer. From minor fixes in powerpoint presentations, to transitioning an entire cirriculum to match the new state standards. She often thinks that the state education office must spend their time plotting for ways to make teacher's jobs harder, with their futile, constant updates and adjustments.

One thing that will never change, however, is how those silly children always manage to find new ways to surprise her. At times, they make her so exasperated, so overwhelmed, that she imagines leaving, never to return. And yet other times they have her laughing so hard with their nonsensical ways that she can't imagine spending her days doing anything else. Sometimes, the latter thought crosses her mind before the former even had time to fully process. Life can be funny in that way, how time can overlap while be so isolated.

This must be life in general, she assumes. The grand lesson in life is to never take time for granted. As a child, you grow up hearing that from adults. You brush it off, as your undeveloped mind cannot comprehend that time can be anything else than what it appears. But as the years go by, you begin to both understand and misinterpret the passage of time. The days are long, but the years are short is another cliche that begins to seep in. You are so focused on the persistent longevity of the here and now, while simultaneously longing for the future answers and the unfolding of current struggles. So much so that before you know it, everything you once knew is long gone. Swept away are both the good and the bad; was there every really much of a difference? And then you're left in the wake, trying to adapt to the ever-changing tides.

She shakes her head, wiping the incessant thoughts of life's perpetual questions clean from her mind. An exsitential crisis is the last thing she needs, especially right now. Right now, she must crawl into bed so she can mentally prepare for tomorrow.

Just like that, the two blissful months were over; now she's staring a new year in the face. As she lays in bed, she realizes something. She accomplished quite a bit this summer break overall, she had to admit. But the one last thing she didn't get to do? The one that kept getting pushed off again and again?

To relax.

Guess that is going on next summer's list.