The Sauce

Two years ago, my life was pretty brutal. I had moved back home after dropping out from med school. To my family’s disdain, not only did I waste their money in pursuit of something I never truly desired, but I asked them for additional money to open up my own restaurant, a childhood dream of mine.

They shut the doors after finding out I used up the money they had lent in buying alcohol to get through the tough college semesters. My mother cried about the once model daughter who successfully destroyed her life and is determined to make it worse.

“Mom, I’ll make it up to you. You have enough money to support my restaurant. Do you not believe in me?” I had asked her on a particularly gloomy day, which was a bad choice. I’ll never forget the look she gave me; tears running down her cheeks, disheveled hair, shivering.

“We have no money. Your father’s company is bleeding money. We can’t support you, Tess.” She told me. She looked at me with regret in her eyes. “You’re on your own now baby. We’re sorry.” She said and quickly walked back to her room and locked it on the inside.

I stayed for a while before I noticed it had been six hours. She was not going to come out. I had to leave. And so, I packed up my belongings, my journal, mood board, an herbology book, all my recipes encompassed in a huge binder and a photo of me and Ken, my soulmate.

***

A month ago, was the two-year anniversary of the restaurant opening. Now, I had a restaurant up and running. It’s a cozy sit-down drawing families and college-goers in the city. Everything was fine, except, I seemed to have inherited a familial curse as my restaurant is far from profitable. My recipes despite garnering positive feedback didn’t generate enough footfall. Word-of-mouth wasn’t enough so I had spent money on marketing. But the difference was negligible.

After the celebration, everyone had gone home after receiving their bonuses. I was about to close and walk out of the restaurant when I had the most unfortunate encounter of my life. Two men wearing a black hoodie and shades walked in.

“I’ll give the money next month. I promise.” I told them as my grip on the counter tightened.

“That’s what you told us last month. In fact, that’s what you’ve been saying for the past one year.” One of the guys said as the other one walked behind counter and rummaged through the drawers and started collecting change.

“Hey! Stop!” I shouted reaching for the money. I was in no position to repay the loan. “I’ll pay you when I’m ready I promise.” I screamed as I lunged at him. The man threw me on the floor as the other one kicked me in the ribs, knocking the wind out of me.

“What do you want me to tell the boss? You promised to pay back in a year.” One of the men said as he kicked me again. He stepped on my wrist and walked over to the counter to collect the money. One of the men came close to my face and in a very menacing tone told me, “There’s other ways for us to collect money too, you know. You’re a pretty young girl.” He said laughing.

“My fiancée will be here any minute. He’s supposed to pick me up.” I told them. They threatened me to not tell anyone about this, or else, they would kill me and my family.

When they left out the door taking the money with them, I tried to get up and noticed that I had several bruises everywhere, my legs, hands, torso. The only thing that was going through my mind was that I couldn’t wait any longer. I had to do something. Something big. And something quick.

***

Tears stream down my face as all the cameras surround me. A burst of confetti falls from above. My fiancée Ken runs up to me with the biggest smile on his face and picks me up, spinning me around.

The host of the show, Rebecca announces, “We have our final two contestants of ‘The Culinary Quest’, Tess Black and Carl Quinn. Congratulations on making it to the final round guys. We’ll meet next week for the finale which will take place in the remote islands of Scarlet Lagoon. Tune in to find the winner of the most watched live streamed cooking competition in the entire world. See you next Sunday.”

The cameras turn off and the lights are dimmed. Rebecca takes out her earpiece and shoots me a quick smile before walking towards Carl and giving him a hug. I give a worried look to Ken and he reassures me by putting his hand on my shoulder which instantly makes me relax.

Rebecca seems to already have a favorite. She has supported Carl in every single episode so far. Although there’s two other judges with her, she’s the one who can easily sway the others with her charm. She’s the more famous and likable judge.

“Looks like I’ll have a tough time winning next week.” I quietly tell Ken. Winning this competition will help me pay off the debt I owe to ‘The Eagles’, one of the most feared mobs known to man. I need the million dollars, desperately.

The show crew usher us to the car waiting outside that will take us straight to the airport so we can fly to the distant island.

The people on the streets are holding posters of me and Ken. Throughout the show, despite not standing out for my dishes, I gained popularity for having the most wholesome relationship. The clips of Ken running up to me when I ‘accidentally’ nicked myself cutting salmon went viral all over social media. It significantly increased the amount of people that watched the live stream.

Ken helped quite a bit by talking about our relationship, how we started dating in high school and how we know everything about each other. Little does he know, that his wife-to-be is a million dollars in debt and owes money to the mob.

Ken rests his hand on mine. My gaze stays fixated on the view outside the window, not wanting to meet his eyes. All I want is to sleep off this anxiety. I reach for a bottle of scent from the Valerian herb in my bag which helps me sleep during the really hard days. One whiff and I’m out for the night.

***

The island is breathtaking with tall palm trees scattered all around it. There are a lot of flowering and fruit plants and few miles away from the ocean, is a dense forest which I find quite intriguing. I take a deep breath and smell the fresh air, and it feels like all my stress vanished as I exhaled. What if I just stay here and never leave?

A smile forms on my face but it doesn’t last long as I notice Rebecca chatting up with Carl. They both giggle and as their laughter echoes on this empty island, my insecurity begins to grow.

“There’s a fan edit of you guys. The public really loves you and Ken.” One of the friendly crew members, Diane, tells me with a warm smile.

“I’m sure they do. We’re lovely indeed. If only the contest was fan-voted, I would’ve won by a landslide.” I reply. Her smile fades away, and an awkward silence kicks in before a huge cackle from Rebecca grabs our attention. Rebecca and Carl are now joined by the other judges too, all laughing and mingling.

“Anyway, you have the whole island to yourselves this week. Have fun!” Diane says quickly and walks off, leaving me alone with my racing thoughts.

As suggested, I stroll around the island. Ken is sleeping in one of the makeshift rooms, while I take photos of the nature all around me. It’s very rare for me to live in the moment. The walk calms me down and gives me a sense of peace.

“Carl is the underdog though. I mean, the kid can cook innumerable cuisines, he has the surprise factor.” I overhear Rebecca say this to one of the producers of the show. They can’t see me as I’m fully concealed by the trees and shrubs. I crouch to hide better.

“I agree. It could be a good underdog story if he wins.” The producer tells her.

My knees give way and I fall on the ground, clutching my head. I try to stop my tears but my face gets warmer and my nose starts to burn. The possibility of coming so close to winning and going home to those men who are ready to destroy my life any chance they get sends me into a full panic.

I slowly walk back with my eyes looking down, not wanting to see a single soul anymore.

Suddenly, I notice a tiny herb at a distance, growing from the rocks near the forest. I quickly runover to take a better look. To my surprise, it’s a Masdove herb. I pluck it in a swift motion and sprint back to my room.

“Where were you? We’ll be late for dinner.” Ken says as soon as I open the door. I hide the herb behind me and slowly place it in my pocket. Ken looks at my face worriedly, which makes me realize that I probably have puffy eyes from my crying session earlier.

“I’m just worried about the competition.” I tell him, making sure to smile to ease him. He tenses up even more.

“You already got so far. Does it even matter who wins? All those people that have been sending you love on the internet, that spam your name on every post, and that have created fan accounts to support you; they can’t wait for your restaurant doors to open again Tess.” Ken tells me sincerely holding both my hands.

“What about the money though?” I ask him, unable to bear the fact that Ken isn’t aware of the gravity of the situation.

“The money will come to you. There are people out there that are willing to pay so much money for your food.” He says.

“That won’t be enough. It costs a lot of money to stock the kitchen, maintain appliances, pay the staff, marketing. You wouldn’t know about it. I wish I was so blissfully oblivious as you.” I tell him, regretting the last two sentences, knowing it’s too late to take it back.

Ken studies me for a minute before he starts speaking again. “You’re hiding something from me.” He caught me.

“I owe money to someone. The Eagles to be specific.” I tell him, not meeting his eyes.

“You took money from Loan sharks?” He screams and starts pacing around. Seeing him agitated starts making me feel anxious again, but then I place my hand in my pocket, over the herb that I had picked up.

I remove my hand from my pocket and grab Ken’s shoulder, stopping him from burning all the calories from the anxiety induced walk.

“I promise I’ll win at all cost.” I assure him.

Ken goes to the dinner alone while I rummage through my suitcases to find my old herbology book. Masdove herb is known for stimulating tastebuds and influencing neurons to secrete dopamine in large amounts. It makes the food taste extremely delicious but can cause death if consumed above a certain amount.

I go through the pages of the book only to find out that the certain amount is very less. No one can take a second bite if I were to serve this. I read all the variety of dishes that I can incorporate the herb into before I notice the sauce recipe.

***

It’s the finale day. I give Carl a friendly nod and a smile that he reciprocates before the timer starts and Rebecca shouts for us to begin cooking. I glance at the live chat visible on a big screen next to the judges panel where my name gets spammed and feel a sudden guilt about what I’m about to do. But pushing through the ethics, I start preparing the sauce for my dish.

The sauce is rich in flavour with tomato, shallots and a lot of spices. I feel for the tiny squeeze bottle that I stuck to my forearm which being well hidden due to my long sleeved top. The Masdove drops fall into the sauce little by little as I notice the cameras are all focused on Carl, the charmer, the judges surrounding him asking about his dish.

No one seems to have noticed. I stir the sauce a bit more, add the red wine and begin to prepare the steak.

The judges come up to me and I observe that our conversation was a lot shorter compared than the one they had with Carl. This makes me feel better about what I’m doing.

I cut up the steak into a tiny piece and add a teaspoon of sauce on top of it. The judges call us to present our dishes. They look at me puzzled due to the tiny bites I presented them, as if waiting for me to bring something more over to them.

“That’s the Peppercrusted skirt steak topped with some tomato and shallot sauce.” I inform them. They look at each other before they nod and ask me to go back to my station.

Carl is the first to be judged. And the judges are harsh on him. His food is bland apparently. Despite his presentation being really good, a silly mistake of forgetting to add enough salt and garlic is costing him his obvious win.

Then, my name is called. I give a brief explanation of the preparation of my dish, making sure to leave out the details of the Masdove herb usage.

They look skeptically at the dish before they each take one bite and their eyes widen. Rebecca’s fork falls on the plate as she looks at me with shock on her face.

“I’m speechless. I’ve never tasted anything so good.” She says, scooping up the crumbs off her plate and tasting again.

“My god Tess. What did you put in this? It’s absolutely amazing.” One of the judges says. They all start praising and remarking about this breakthrough dish. I take a quick look at the chat again and I feel relieved to see my fans happily rejoicing.

“There’s a very clear winner of ‘The Culinary Quest’, Miss Tess Black!” Rebecca announces and hands me the trophy and the million-dollar cheque. My eyes well up and suddenly all my hardships feel worth it. But a part of me feels a bit of guilt. Carl might’ve lost anyway, given how bland his food was.

Anyway, there’s plenty of time to repent for my sins. I should enjoy my success.

“Your fiancé seems to be grabbing a few bites too. Lucky guy.” Diane tells me as I look over to my station at Ken happily yet hungrily stuffing his face with the steak dipped in sauce. Too much of the sauce can be fatal and he seems to have already eaten a lot. I get filled with dread as I run over to stop him. The cameras follow me to capture another one of our wholesome moments.

“Ken stop!” I yell at him knocking the fork out of his hand. He greets me with a wide smile.

“You made it babe. Congratu…lations.” He says as he falls into my arms and onto the ground.

“Ken, Wake up.” I yell at him to stay awake. The medics get called. The camera crew slowly retreats, the judges surround us.

“No pulse.” The medics announce.

They try to revive him for hours as I sit helplessly cursing my fate. I know he can’t survive it. I painfully realize that to build a beautiful future for us, I neglected the main ingredient that has enhanced my life. My beloved Ken.