Beware the Zwetshgenkuchen

Beware the Zwetchgenkuchen

Winter had arrived, and Christmas day was approaching, and there was going to be a big Christmas celebration thrown by one of the biggest companies in town, which was run by a German firm that was relatively new to the area, but very successful none the less. Pretty much everyone in town was talking about it. Not many new events of changes took place in the town. One of those people was a guy called Bill, who liked to see the worst in people, and spreading his poison far and wide made him feel like a big shot..

A Conversation Between Two Old Friends

Bill - “Frank, are you going to the Christmas party that the German company is holding later this week?”

Frank “Of course I am. I suspect that their food could be great, so I am looking forward to a big meal.”

Bill “Well, from what I have heard, I am not so sure that going to such a Christmas party would be a good thing.”

Frank “Why is that, my friend? I know that you are a party person. What could possibly be

wrong with this particular party?”

Bill “Well earlier today, I walked past a group of the Germans in the room where it is going to be held. I have a few words of German that I learned in high school (barely passed the course), and they were laughing loudly at what would happen when the English speakers experienced some occurrence that has the sound zwetch in it”.

“I soon developed a sense that a major mocking was going to happen on this occasion. So I do not know whether I want these foreigners to make fun of us with their ill conceived humour. This is our country, not truly theirs. Christmas is ideally a time of togetherness, sharing the common, not of making fun of people who are different.”

Frank

Frank knew that his friend loved to make fun of people who were different, but did not want to say anything about that. Bill was an old friend that he wanted to keep. So he just nodded his head several times, and said nothing to question Bill’s thinking.

Two Germans Talk About the Anticipated Impact of the Zwetchgenkuchen

Max Speaks His Mind

Max was an executive in the German company, but in a number of ways he was a lot a like Bill. At a meeting concerning the Christmas party, he spoke loudly about his opinion about what it would be like.

“It will certainly be something to see the reaction of the unaware Canadians when they are exposed to the zwetchgenkuchen. They will not know what has hit them. It will certainly be a Christmas party to remember, rather than the often boring ones that we have experienced over the last few years while living here, with all their high predictability. The zwetchgenkuchen will be the hit of the party.”

Some of his colleagues smiled and agreed with him, while others, knowing Max well, wondered whether what he said would have any truth to it.

The Story of the Zwetchgenkuchen Spreads Across the Town

Day by day, drink by drink, pub by pub the varying stories of the zwetchgenkuch spread across the town, said in many ways that would make the Germans laugh. The possibilities of what could happen increased with the imaginations of the speakers, and the biases of some of the more prejudiced people. The phrase, ‘well I don’t plan on going’, spread as well. Some added with it the phrase, remarks such ‘my father or grandfather fought in World War II’.

The fact that the hierarchy of the company had early on and repetitively spoke of their being anti-Nazi, had not been heard or acknowledged by such people.

Preparing the Zwetchgenkuchen

Meanwhile, the Canadian Germans were talking about what the Canadian reaction would be to the zwetchgenkuchen. They imagine how badly the name would be spoken by them, if they even tried. They thought that how they said it would be a cause of much laughter on their part .But once they experienced the zwetchgenkuchen the laughter would be replaced by sharing good times . They were pretty sure of that. So they prepared the zwetchgenkuchen.

The Day of the Christmas Party

Frank’s curiosity got the better of him. He really wanted to find out what zwetchgenkuchen was. He found it hard to believe that respectable business people would do something terrible at a Christmas party. At the very least, it would be bad for their business. That would not be practical for their future sales. And he had never heard anyone speak badly of the company before.

So he decided that he had to go. There were a good number of people standing outside the company building. Some like Frank were planning to go to the Christmas party, no matter what more close minded people were saying. There were others who issued warnings with poorly articulated pronunciations of zwetchgenkuchen. But nothing changed Frank’s views.

The door opened and the hosts stepped outside and said, “You are going to experience something that is beyond the restrictions of your life’s experiences. Frank was the first to step forward, and encouraged others to follow him. When he got inside he smelled something tasty and then he saw what zwetchgenkuchen was, It was a prune plum pie that he soon found out was one of the tastiest treats he had ever consumed. He learned that the word had two parts, zwetschgen referring to the main ingredient, kuchen meaning ‘cake.’

He refrained from eating a two small pieces of large slice his second and took them outside to convince Bill of what he had just learned.“Here, taste this. You will absolutely love it., I am sure. He placed one piece in Bill’s left hand. As proof that there was nothing wrong with it, he took the remains of what he had and stuffed it into his mouth, and made exaggerated sounds of yummy. Bill decided to take a chance. To his surprise but not that of Frank, he loved it. He and many others wanted the to get their own samples.

For days after the Christmas party zwetchgenkuchen became a popular article in in the food section of the local paper, and eventually a couple of restaurants signed a contract with the Germans that had introduced the town to the lovely treat. Local farmers started to grow the necessary crop.