Campsite Serial Killers

“Delaware Sheriffs department, what’s your emergency?” she said.

“They trying to kill me.” I whispered.

“Sir, can you speak up? Who is trying to kill you?”

“Negative. Send a deputy, right now. I’m begging you. They trying to kill me.”

“Sir, are you someplace safe. Can you speak up?”

I pushed the phone tighter to my ear, hoping she can hear me better.

“They were outside last night.”

“Sir, what is your location. Can you get someplace safe?” she asked. The click of the keyboard in her background.

“I’m…um at…A1 site. The Alum Creek Campgrounds. Me and my wife. They tried to kill us. Shooting at us. Kill me… Like kill me dead you know. Dead dead. Hurry, send a deputy.”

I pushed the curtain back from the bedroom window, looking around the site. Trees, the creek, the picnic table and fire ring. Some romantic campground this is.

“Who is trying to kill you. Sir, are you able to get out of there safely?”

“Miss, send a deputy now. It’s not safe here. They left me a warning that we was next.”

“Warning? From who? Who is with you? Sir, I have dispatched the deputy. Are you someplace safe sir?”

“My wife. She’s in the shower. The owners, they the killers I hear about. They got me trapped in. Me and my wife. I’m at site A1, the campground, tell him to hurry. We’re in danger. They shot everyone up last night. We knew we were next. I’ve heard the stories about how it happens. And it happened. They put one of their warnings outside my door this morning. Telling me we’re next.”

“Where is A1 at, Sir?”

“The Alum Creek State Park. The campground.”

I pulled the curtain closed and headed to the front seat. Sneaking peeks around my RV. The shots and screams coming at us from the front last night. We weren’t brave enough to get up and look. Hiding out on the floor. I rubbed at the back on my neck, felt it tighten up.

“Can you get to some place safe Sir?” More clicks of the keyboard.

“I suppose I could. Maybe not. I don’t know. Tell the deputy to bring some of those bags. I know there’s bodies everywhere with the screaming and the shots last night.”

“Do you see the perp? Can you give me a description of your surroundings. What do you see, Sir?”

I ducked down behind the driver’s seat, another shot fired.

“I can’t…not…not today. I’m in danger,” I yelled. “Susie, hold on.”

“Sir, who is Susie?”

“Wife. She’s hosing off in the shower. No time last night after we got here, we was hiding. Everyone screaming.”

I slide into the driver’s seat, looking around, making sure I’m not being watched. I turned the ignition on and listened to the engine fire up hot.

“Can you tell me who is there with you Sir?”

“Wife. And the warning. Outside my door. Killer turtle. Snapped at me. That’s how they warn you. The owners trying hard to kill me. Like they did everyone else. When the screaming stopped, we knew we was done for. How far the deputy?”

“Sir, the deputy is twelve minutes out. Can you get someplace safe?”

“That’s what I’m trying… Ain’t safe here. These serial killers, I knew they be here. Ain’t safe. Everyone dead. That warning…” I yelled at her.

“I’ll stay on the line until I know you’re to safety sir. Can you tell me what warning they sent? How do you know you’re in danger?”

I yanked on the lever and got the RV in gear. I checked my right real quick, the direction of the noise of the shots fired. I have time to get in front of the busted Ford truck coming up the roadway.

I punched the gas and turned the RV to the left right quick. In my rear view I see my wife tossed out the bathroom, soap suds all in her hair. She lets out a scream as I hit the gas hard.

“Sir, who just screamed?”

“The wife. Bounced herself right out the shower. I’m headed to the exit.”

“I’ll stay on the line with you Sir until you meet up with the deputy. Can you tell me what you are driving?”

“An RV.”

“What style RV, Sir?”

“I think it’s called a Winterbegger or something like that. Wife calls her Winnie, she found it on the internet last week. Insisting we try new stuff, camping. This isn’t the new stuff I’m after. Gimme new tools, that’s my fancy new stuff. Pretending we’re homeless people like this, she says its romantic. BAHH - Hang on.”

“What color is your RV Sir?”

“The tanned hide of squirrels, best I can call it.”

I spun the wheel back to the right and then twisted the wheel a quick left crossing through the yard to get to the next road. I hit my foot on the gas and sped the Winnie up. The wife lets out a yelp and started yelling to slow down or something. I’m never minding her words.

I’m blaming her for making us targets, trying to get us killed.

The stories, they’re true. I knew camping was dangerous.

“I’m almost to the exit. I’ll be turning right out of here.” I whispered to dispatch.

“I’ve informed the deputy your direction. Can you go to someplace safe? I will give him your location.”

“Pizza joint, I’d guess two, maybe one mile down.”

“I will send him your way. Sit tight, Sir.”

“Ma’am, you need to hurry. The owners now running out the check-in building at me. I can’t stop. I don’t want to get shot. But she’s running fast at me.”

I yanked on the wheel, darted across the drive, nearly missing the lady. Her arms waving over her head frantic, wild eyes, flipping something white in her hand. I hit the gas so fast, roared the engine loud, I couldn’t hear what she screaming at me.

Not mattering much, I have to get us to safety. I don’t want to die.

My wife started yelling a little louder in the back. In the rear view mirror, I see her body bouncing on top the bed. I’m not gonna listen to her telling me to slow it down. Her idea of romance, camping, I don’t want us to die.

I stomped my foot on the gas pedal for Winnie to go, roaring the engine real loud as I got on the road. Smoke coming out the back end of her. I’d guess she’s not breathed like this in awhile with all that smoke.

“Ma’am I’m almost to the pizza joint. Tell the deputy to hurry. The check-in building, that lady, she’s after me. Screaming real angry. She doesn’t want me to escape. I knew it, she wants to murder us next. Hurry.”

“Sir, sit tight. The deputy will be there shortly.”

I hear the walkie talkie crack and scratch, ‘perrcc’ - “This is dispatch, the tan Winnebago is in the parking lot of Lou’s Pizza Palace. Be advised.”

‘perrcc’ - “Copy, enroute, almost there.” The male voice.

“Sit tight Sir, he is almost there.”

I watched out the front window as the cruiser car, with his lights on, pulls in the lot and parks at the front end of Winnie. My wife isn’t screaming at me anymore. I watched her in the rear view mirror wrap a towel around her body.

“Deputy is here ma’am. I’m hanging up.”

“He will take your report and open the investigation. Good luck, Sir.”

I watched the deputy slide out the cruiser and I darted out the front seat. Met him face to face at the door before he could knock. Almost hit him flinging the door open so fast.

He stepped back, giving me space to jump out.

I hopped out the door, jumping across the three stair steps.

“Good morning sir. I got a dispatch, you requesting help and to file a report. I see your tags, new RV for you? Almost bought one just like it last week. Same tan color. The mud on your tires, surprised it made it off road. Dispatch mentions you arrived last night. Great firework show the campground sets off. Did you catch it? She mentioned you were at the A1 site. I’ve popped a tent there. Little scary being close to the water. The snapping turtles love to give good morning kisses and hisses. Gotta watch out for those. She mentioned you heard screaming. I’d guess the concert lasted a little longer than normal. We have to issue noise warnings down there sometimes. Let me get my notebook ready and take your statement, Sir.”

He clicked his pen.

Opened his notebook.

Looked over the RV.

“Sir, you know your hook ups are still out. The campground owners, they may press charges for damage. I see the pole is still attached to end of the electric hook-up. They are nice people though, always wave good bye when you leave. They flagged me down the one time I was leaving. Left my stairs out on accident. I see you did that too. Make sure you get that tucked in tight so there’s no issues you getting home. Great campground. Best around the area. Hope you give them a five-star review. I had to give them a four-star. No warning about staying out of the woods. Got into some poison ivy. Learned to stay away from the woods the hard way.”

I looked down at his arm, pink blotches covering most of his skin.

“Did you meet Camp-Out Tony while there? He’s got a favorite site. Makes a mean stew for supper. His site, just a few down from yours. That truck of his, his pride-n-joy, even though it backfires. Everyone knows when he’s headed out. First time I heard that bag out the exhaust, woke me out of a dead sleep. Sounded like a gun going off. Camp-Out Tony, good dude that makes a mean stew. You should meet him.”

“Um…” I said.

“Now tell me Sir. What happened? Start from the beginning.”

Susie stepped down from the RV. Towel barely hanging on. Soap sliding down her neck.

Walked past Harold without looking at him.

Extended her hand to the deputy.

“I’m Susie. I’d like to file for divorce. Do you do that? Or is that a different department?”