The Eye

Pain reverberated through my fist as it collided again and again against the doors of the Northern Ice Palace. Its nickname was accurate if not creative; the imposing structure towered over the land, supposedly housing the power that protected locals from the true extremes of winter within its ice-coated exterior. I stood alone facing the front entrance, my raps mirroring the begging words that plagued my mind: words that I wished I could scream into the faces of the gods themselves.

Help. Please. Your protection over us is fading. We need more. WE NEED MORE.

The world had been covered in snow for hundreds of years. When the weather had first started to turn, the human population, seeking anything that would save their sparsely furred hides, had groveled to the ancient gods of Earth and been awarded a limited number of sanctuaries across the globe. Each one had arisen from the ground simultaneously at the epicenters of the worst storms, taking the pinpoint of calm that existed in each focal point and creating stability for humans within such areas. The protection was supposed to cover a certain number of miles ringing the palaces as well, but each year village residents had noticed the borders shrinking further and further in. It was never much at a time, maybe the loss of one row of crops a season, but such slow progress had still turned dire after time. Now, the families who remained alive cowered in the extreme cold together, spiteful at their patron god for having lost the will to protect them.

I had never been one to cower from the storm.

“Alisha!” I felt an arm wrap around my back, pressing me flat against the palace doors and forcefully stopping my rapping. “Alisha you are bleeding, stop this madness. Obviously there must be another way to get inside.” At Jarod’s words I looked down at my hand, where ice fragments reflected pink from the mixture of blood and snow that had managed to freeze my hand as a fist. I growled in frustration, the noise emanating from the depths of my throat with uncalled-for anger. My best friend turned me around and pressed my body into his in a warm hug gentle enough to calm my spiraling mind. I melted in his arms, and my hand slowly started to unclench. As it unfroze I felt pinpricks of pain shoot up and down each finger. I had been stupid touching ice like that. Thank goodness the feeling in those fingers hadn't been gone long enough to be lost to me forever.

“Thank you.” I whispered. My brain tried to formulate thoughts, but it was difficult. Even having grown up in this frozen wasteland, it was hard for brains to work smoothly when faced with the constant pain of the cold at this level. “I thought she would just take a couple of minutes. I thought Amarantha would see me and open the door.” I blinked rapidly, fighting to keep tears from falling from my eyes. They would only freeze once they hit my cheeks. “Does she not see how faithful I’ve been? She has been my guiding light for my entire life. I worship her more regularly than anyone else in town. How does she not recognize me?” I knew the words spilling from my mouth sounded like whines. They were. I had dedicated my life in service to our patron goddess from the time I could speak. Amarantha’s name was my first multi-syllable word, spoken in front of my mother’s altar when I was barely a year old. I had thought for sure that if I was to come and commune with her at the greatest sight of her power, she would see how needed she was. “I have to get inside. Maybe these doors are the problem. They are too thick and she can’t see me with them between us.” I looked back at the entrance and scowled.

“Have you considered that maybe Amarantha is gone from this place?” Jarod’s gaze was pitying and soft. I had pulled away from his embrace but he looked ready to wrap me back in his arms at a heartbeat’s notice. “Have you considered that she needed faith from the collective, and nothing you could have done would have made up for it?”

“You speak like it's decided! You sound like there are no alternative options! I know she can hear me. I can feel her watching me. I can feel her inside my head.” I turned and placed my palms back against the icy door, fingers spread. I could feel the ice immediately try to fuse my skin there, and barely stopped a whimper from escaping.

“Alisha, NO!” Jarod tried to pull back my left hand but I pressed harder, letting the fusion advance.

“She will hear me!” I screamed. I pressed my forehead against the door as well, not caring about the repercussions. Under my breath, I prayed. Hot breath released from my mouth with every word, creating steam in the air and obscuring my vision. I could hear Jarod protesting behind me, but his voice was quiet now. I couldn’t make out a word.

Suddenly, there was a flash of light from in front of me. The doors were parting backwards from between my outstretched hands, and with the glow from within the palace came the most comforting heat I ever could have imagined. My forehead detached from where it had fused with the wall. My hands followed suit in the moments after. Without a glance behind me, for I knew that Jarod would follow, open-mouthed, I strode inside.

What I saw in front of me took my breath away. There was an ice sculpture of a woman, collapsed on bent knees, staring up into the richly decorated ceiling of the room. It was a busy image that lived above us and if I had had the time, I would have spent hours standing there decoding and memorizing the story that it surely told. Jarod knew this as well as I did, and quickly poked my shoulder before I inevitably became lost in wonder. Without a word, I strode toward the statue, and knelt in front of her.

I naturally mirrored her position, seeking to understand anything that Amarantha was willing to share. As my gaze moved upwards, I noticed that one of the statue’s eyes had more color and dimension within it than should have been possible being carved from ice. I immediately stood and looked back at Jarod.

“That was the quickest commune I have ever seen from you-” he started saying. I cut him off.

“The eye. It is special. Come here.” I grasped at his arm, ignoring his flinch when my cold hand wrapped around his tricep and pulled him down and closer. The eye was encased within the sculpture, under at least a couple thin layers of ice. “Look at the color. It’s saying something Jarod, I know it. It’s special. Amarantha wanted me to see it.” I was rambling but I didn’t care. Since the moment the doors had opened, I had felt only relief and power. I felt seen in a way people from our village hadn’t been seen in years. Everything that I had given to the gods was worth it to bask in this moment. To be graced with Amarantha’s blessing. “I must ask you the biggest favor of my life, Jarod.”

It was as if the instructions were splayed on the inside of my brain. I looked at the sculpture and intrinsically knew what I had to do. I knew what I had to give to receive my lady’s help. I slowly reached within my boot and pulled out a dagger.

“Jarod.” I laid the weapon across my palms and looked at my compatriot. I knew he would be able to see the truth and determination in my face. “The eye is the key. Without your help, I will not have a place to keep it.”

My friend’s eyes widened as he realized what I was implying. “Alisha you can not mean for me to take out one of your eyes.”

“The gods have no use for someone who seeks their own preservation and protection over trust in them. There is no choice. I have been given this test, after begging for guidance. I must follow this path that I have chosen to walk. I will do anything for Amarantha, and today I am given the chance to prove that dedication.” Being within the palace, I let this tear fall from my eye, spilling the gratitude that was welling up inside my body onto the icy blue floor at my feet. “Please.”

Jarod had known me for most of my life and had a better eye for reading my intentions than anyone else - besides perhaps Amarantha herself. He paled at my request, knowing how serious I was. “Alisha, what if you are wrong?” He whispered, his fear easily making up for two. I held firm.

“I’m not wrong. Please.” I was thankful my words came out steady and forceful. I sounded ready, even if a part of my brain felt like it was screaming at me not to do this. It was common knowledge that the gods often requested sacrifices from worshipers, although few gods asked for parts of the human body. I had to believe that there was a reason Amarantha had such a high price for me today. Plus - I reminded myself - this wasn’t a normal sacrifice. I was not being left without an eye.

Jarod made quick work of the situation. He had to brace my head between his knees; I could stop my hands from flailing behind him for the most part, but it was impossible for me to control the flinching, spastic movements of my head as it processed the most unimaginable pain. When it was over, we were both panting. I barely managed to stand as the blood loss made my head reel. I shuffled towards the ice sculpture, wincing as the cold blew past and around my exposed face. I couldn’t tell where the draft came from, but it invigorated me. It reminded me of what I was fighting for. Jarod stood by respectfully, only stepping forward to help brace me once when I took an especially shaky step. I nodded in appreciation.

When I stood in front of the kneeling woman once more, I closed my remaining eye and searched for guidance. It came as a slight pull at my right hand. I reached out and cupped the woman’s face from the chin, crouching to be at eye level with her. As I did, I felt a most unexpected warmth begin to emanate from her. It was like a mirage in the desert and I couldn’t believe my eyes when the sculpture turned and looked upon me with that beautiful eye. I felt the words she spoke more than I saw her say them.

“You shall do wonderfully.”

Almost immediately, the warmth from the sculpture erupted into a fiery heat. Instead of leaping back and away like I wanted to, I kept my hand where it was. It was its own kind of fierce elemental pain, so similar and yet so different from the pain of ice and cold that I knew so well. Feeling the two burns mix on my hand, for it had not been long since my hand had become frozen from knocking on the door, was less relieving than I would have imagined. It just felt like two painful extremes fighting for dominance on my skin. I stayed there though, holding out with patience until I felt the eye fall into my waiting hand.

I smiled. I couldn’t help it. The blood loss still had me swaying, and my body was in more pain than I could ever remember facing before, but my only thoughts were affirmations. I was blessed by Amarantha. Our bond was indeed as special and unique as I had always craved. I lifted the eye to my own face, and let it fall into place.

It seemed to know what to do, connecting to my nerves without help from myself or Jarod. That was a relief. I didn’t think the man could take much more helping today after everything I had already had to ask of him. I stood still for several moments, letting it do its work until some of the pain had begun to ease. Then, very slowly, I attempted to blink.

When I opened my new eye for the first time, I had to stifle a scream. Colorful blobs floated through my vision: tiny pinpricks of color that filled the room around us. One had alighted on Jarod’s shoulder, and seemed content to balance there unbeknownst to us all this time. I snapped my eyes closed.

“What is it?” Jarod asked, noticing my behavior. I could tell he was holding himself back from so much. He was not only my best friend, but our parents had given him the duty of being my protector from the time we were maybe five years old. Being dedicated to the goddess, I had sworn off of violence and had spent most of my life simply growing stronger in my faith. He had always had to be physically strong enough for both of us. Today, he had had to listen to me and use that strength and skill for an unimaginable reason. Now, he was forced to simply wait and watch, and no amount of assurance from me could prove that this was the right course of action until it was done. My heart ached for him, but I had never loved him more.

“I’m not sure.” I replied truthfully, with my eyes still closed. Some of the pain from inserting the new eye had faded, but I could tell that internally work was still being done. I decided to hold off on opening them again until I would actually be able to see with clarity. “We aren’t alone in here though.”

Jarod immediately reached for his sword. I could hear him unsheathe just an inch, preparing his hand to whip it from his scabbard at a moment’s notice.

“No! I don’t think we are in danger. Just, hold on a moment.” He grumbled something that sounded like such had been his intention anyway. I ignored it, still trying to focus on the mending taking place within me. Everything seemed more settled, if not one hundred percent completed. I decided to try opening my eyes once more.

When I did, I opened them to see a faerie floating just in front of my face. I balked, standing still to see if I was imagining such a being, until she crossed her arms and blew a flyaway bang away from her eyes with a puff of breath.

One of her eyes shone with the same colors as my own.

“So you can see us now. That is a good sign. Can you hear us too?” Her voice sounded shrill and slightly agitated, as if she had been trying to talk to me for hours and I had only just noticed her presence. Actually, I realized there was a fair likelihood that such had been the case.

“I can hear you too.” I whispered, our eye contact remaining locked. In her eye, the colors twisted and moved around her iris, changing from green to blue to brown to purple to every color under the sun and back again. It was beautiful and mesmerizing all at once. “Can you help us?”

The faerie grinned, her small but surprisingly sharp teeth reflecting the light off of the icy walls and calling special attention to themselves. “That is the plan m’lady. You have taken into yourself more power than you know. Are you ready to help us fix this god-forsaken world?”