Worth a Shot

The trees rustled overhead like gossipy high school kids whispering his name.

Wally Cobb’s stomach rolled – a washing machine on spin. They’d not spoken in almost seven minutes. Had anyone ever gone this long without talking? Even monks who’d taken a vow of silence must say the odd ‘Bugger!’ when stubbing a toe on the coffee table. What had he been thinking when he asked if she wanted to go on a walk with him? He’d known he was a loser since the age of six; things hadn’t changed in twenty-five years. And what had she been thinking when she said yes? For all she knew, he was walking her through the trees to her death.

Chloe Hayes walked beside him in silence. She glanced up at him, green eyes sparkling like azure waters if they were green instead. She smiled, her cheeks dimpling, but she said nothing.

Wally swallowed, but it caught in his throat. Of course, she didn’t say anything; she was waiting for him to guide the conversation. But what on earth did he talk about? He was boring; he did nothing interesting. ‘Despite asking you here, it’s my first time here because I had to Google it? Most of my hobbies can be done in my lounge. I’ve never had a proper girlfriend before, and I’m really hoping you’ll be my first? I’m totally into you. What say we get married, have a couple of kids and die of old age?’ No, that wouldn’t work. Everything he felt and thought he should keep buried deep inside him, because it was stupid. No, if he revealed who he actually was, he’d lose her straight away. The route to a girl’s heart was to pretend to be what he wasn’t: a cool guy. Reel her in, then when she’s too invested to escape, then BAM! Awkward nerd. Yes, he would sunk-cost-fallacy his way into her heart. ‘I really like all the—’ he gestured to the forest ‘—plants and stuff.’

Chloe’s grin widened. ‘Me too. Also like the plants. And stuff.’

Great, nice one, genius. Chloe was now mocking Wally like every single girl before her had. She had to be. Damn it, he’d been so close, too! Wally felt she’d been on the cusp of almost liking him, but then he had to go and spoil it all by saying something. He should’ve remained quiet and mysterious. He should have worn a leather jacket and shades. He should have picked up smoking; it was disgusting, but man, it looked cool. He sighed, shoulders drooping. ‘Y’know, we don’t have to keep going if this is awkw—’

‘What’s that?’ asked Chloe, pointing.

Wally followed her finger. ‘Huh?’

A gate marked the entrance to an overgrown path through the trees. A mossy sign read: ‘WARNING: DO NOT ENTER’.

His chest tightened. His first thought was of curiosity – what the hell lay back there? But curiosity gave way to excitement. This danger sign was his chance. To be cool, to be brave. He turned to Chloe, one eyebrow raised at a jaunty angle. ‘Shall we check it out?’

Chloe smiled, frowning. ‘No, the sign says we shouldn’t, Wally. Let’s just finish the walk, hm?’

He was losing her. Time for the big guns. Wally exhaled through his nose. ‘You always do what you’re told?’

Chloe’s eyes widened. ‘No, Wally, you don’t—’

But he’d already leapfrogged over the gate and faceplanted in the dirt.

Behind him came the squeak of the gate. ‘It was open, Wally.’

Wally got up and dusted himself off, feeling an egg growing on his forehead. He wanted the earth to open up and swallow him whole. Jesus, take him now. But he was in too deep. Don’t acknowledge his clumsiness. Forge ahead, be decisive. He waggled his eyebrows at Chloe. ‘Let’s see where this leads, huh?’

Chloe folded her arms across her chest. ‘Why don’t we head back to the trail? I don’t want to break the law or anything. We could head back to yours and play some boardga—’

Wally was already crashing through the undergrowth. ‘Two minutes, tops, then we’ll be back!’

The path led through the trees and opened out onto a massive green field. Dotted here and there were artists’ easels, all pointed in the other direction. Each held a large canvas, some with gaping holes.

Wally frowned, still smiling. What the hell was this? But – ah – now wasn’t the time for worry or second doubts. Now was the time for action. He strode from the path and out into the clearing, tilting his head at the various canvases. ‘Hey, Chloe, check this out! It’s some sort of art exhibit!’

Thunk! Something impacted somewhere up ahead. From the treeline, Chloe whispered, ‘Wally! Come back!’

Fascinated, Wally stepped between two of the easels.

And that was when something punched through his chest.

Wally’s body thudded to the floor.

But Wally remained upright.

He looked back. ‘Huh?’

There he lay on the ground, an arrow sticking from his chest.

Ah. So that meant—

He prodded his belly, and his finger went straight through.

Chloe screamed. ‘WALLY!’

Yep. That shriek said it all. And Mum had said the worst that could happen was she’d say ‘no’. He turned in Chloe’s direction.

She was running out from the treeline, headed in his direction. Or, rather, headed for his corpse’s direction.

The sight of the girl he had a crush on rushing to his aid warmed his cold, dead heart.

But then another arrow thunked into one of the canvases next to him.

Wally’s eyes widened. ‘Oh, no, Chloe, you ought to—’

But of course, she couldn’t hear him. She was alive, and he very much wasn’t. But all that changed when another arrow came and struck her dead, as she knelt by his body.

Wally winced, closing his eyes. ‘Oh, dang it.’

A second passed. ‘What the hell, Wally?’

He opened his eyes.

Chloe was there, hands on her hips, an arrow sticking out of her chest. Chloe was also lying on the floor, mouth open in a scream, also with an arrow sticking out of her chest.

Wally sucked in a breath, heart hammering. ‘I’m so sorry, Chloe, but it seems we’re dead and that we’ve returned as g—’

She tilted her head to the sky. ‘Yes, I can see that, Wally. I mean what the hell were you thinking?’

‘I-I— I’m sorry, I wasn’t really thinking at all, I just…’

Chloe flapped a ghost hand at him. ‘Forget it. It’s happened; it’s in the past now.’

Wally relaxed. She’d taken this whole death thing rather well. Chloe was the one for him. Why not go for it? The worst had already happened. ‘Chloe, I know we’re dead now, but— W-would you like to go for a drink with me sometime, if you’d like? Of course, you don’t have to if you don’t want to, it’s completely your choice, in fact, I don’t mind at all, but if you would like it – not saying that you would – it’d be nice if—’

Chloe stared at him, floating in the air.

Wally’s words trailed off.

In the silence, Chloe frowned, eyes on the transparent arrow protruding from his chest. ‘I liked you, Wally, I really did. Awkward I could handle. Clumsy, even. You were cute. Performative bravery just doesn’t work for me. And getting me killed just to impress me is… difficult to overlook.’

‘But I jus—’

She floated off in the direction of the trees. ‘Goodbye, Wally.’

His dead heart thudded hard, somewhere. ‘Where are you going?’

Chloe gave him a sympathetic look. ‘It’s hunting season. There’s bound to be someone new.’

He sank. ‘Someone new?’

She gave a slight shrug. ‘A hunter. A camper. Accidents happen.’

‘Wha—?’

She disappeared into the trees, and the leaves rustled overhead.