The Proposal

“My darling, I will love you forever.”

Myles whispers with a quivering voice, desperately gazing into my eyes. His excitement quickly turns to fear as I maintain my frozen disposition, which shifts from a gasp to silence. My voice eventually cracks as a small squeak fills the air, but I still don't say yes. His smile fades as he sees the hesitation. He glances briefly at the crowd that begins to gather around us, eager for a "Yes!"

Myles, still down on one knee, clings to the ring box, waiting for the one word to escape my lips that will change our future forever. My eyes fill with tears. We’ve been together for two years; we’ve talked about this. Now that the moment is here, I feel like I’m suffocating and need to catch my breath. Is he really my soulmate?

I am expecting this, so why am I so afraid? The reason... I see a glimmer of light in the distance, followed by an intense, overwhelming feeling of love and desire. A brief image of my life with someone else fills my mind—a memory of a past life, I suppose—as the man in my vision feels so familiar, but one I know I’ve never met.

I’ve seen this light throughout my lifetime. It’s always watching over me and is always too far to reach, but this time the light is just feet away—so close I can touch it. Another gasp escapes my lips as I pull my hand away from Myles and run as fast as I can toward the end of the street as the light darts around the corner.

Just as I reach the edge of the building, I see the light turn down another street. I throw off my heels to pick up speed, ignoring the cold, uneven bricks that lie along the walkway. I dodge pedestrians as best I can—it’s more like a game of bumper people as I run, hearing grunts and grievances. It’s not getting away from me this time. I have to catch it, I have to.

As I turn down another street to a darkened alleyway, I bend over in tears. “No, I need you. Please…” I beg. I see light appear through a broken window to an abandoned shop. I run toward the door. I pause briefly before bursting through it to find the light glowing in the corner. It’s like a white cloud surrounding the sun. It’s blinding.

“Don’t come any closer,” a deep, thunder like voice pierces my ears. But every step closer I get, the clearer his image and my abiding memories become. I reach out with shaky hands and let the cloud of light envelop my body. I feel the familiar intense love, completely intangible in human form. “I remember.”

The form embraces me as my body transcends into the light. I’ve become transformed and feel weightless. “Don’t let go!” Two entities become one; our spirits weave into each other. The eternal memories flow through my mind like a movie: times we’ve been together, others when I have watched over his life, and times like now when he’s watching over mine. I am so happy, so complete—I found my soulmate. “My love, how I’ve missed you.” He holds me tight, and we kiss passionately. It seems cruel to be separated, but the eternal perspective is clear. Time on this Earth is for learning and growth. How precious it is to have an eternal companion watching over and protecting me.

Time doesn’t seem to exist in this light as we hold each other affectionately. But eventually, he pulls away. With sadness in his eyes, he whispers, “You have to go back. I shouldn’t have let you in.”

“I want to stay with you.”

“I know. You can’t, but I will watch over you. You deserve happiness in this life. Myles is a good man, and he will take care of you. When the time comes, we will be together again. But, for now, don’t live this life alone.” As I step out of the light, I can feel the weight of my physical body again. With each step I take away from the light, the feelings and memories fade with it. “I want to remember this.”

He simply smiles.

I cry as I hear the door creak open, and the light completely disappears. Myles walks toward me with a concerned look on his face, holding my shoes and scarf in his arms. “What are you doing here? I was worried sick when you took off like that.”

“How did you find me?”

“I followed your trail, and then I saw a bright light through the window.” He lifts up his arms filled with my items and looks concerned as he glances around, discovering that the only light now is coming from a dim street lamp outside. He shakes off the feeling he’s going crazy. “I don’t know what’s happening, but if you are not ready to get married, I can wait. For however long it takes, because I love you.”

“I love you too. I am sorry I ran away. I am not really sure what came over me.” Myles walks over. After wiping away my tears, he kneels down and rubs my cold feet to warm them before putting each shoe back on. Then he gently wraps the scarf around my neck and pulls me close. “You are a nut. You know that?” He grins.

“You’re a good man, Myles Alexander Grant. Can I... can I give you my answer now?”

He glances around the room. “Noooo, you may not!” He dramatically points his finger at the nightmare around us: broken shelves, creepy shadows, clutter, and garbage on the dirty floor. “You should have done that when we were surrounded by people and the fantastic Holiday ambiance in the town square!”

He shakes his head. “When we retell this story of when you excitedly say yes to marrying me, I don’t want it to be in a spine-chilling, condemned store. Can we please get out of here?”

“It is pretty creepy in here.”

As if nothing strange happened, Myles takes my hand, and we walk back to the town square where the feel of the festive Holiday season is dazzling and radiant. In the center of the square is the decorated Christmas tree, a makeshift ice rink with families screaming in delight, an old carousel spinning slowly with young children who have red noses from the cold, and aromas of food filling the air. Snowflakes begin to fall. “Now, this is more like it.”

Myles grins, “Well, what do you say?”

“Yes.”

“Hmm, do you think you can say that a little louder so the people who missed it the first time can hear you?”

I stretch my arms out wide and shout at the top of my lungs, “Yes!”

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, I will marry you!”

Myles picks me up and spins me in circles. A few random folks smile, some clap but then go about their business.

He puts me down. “Lucky for you I still have this.” He pulls the ring out of his pocket and slides it onto my finger. I press my cold lips onto his and wrap my arms around him to hold him tight. In that moment, I hear the voice of my eternal beloved whisper,

“My darling, I will love you forever.”