Satin Is Under Your Feet, So Stomp Him

Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va. there lived a guy named Sam who wanted more then anything in the world to be a published author. He had a gift for writing funny stories which would make a lot of people laugh who read them. The problem was none of the publishing companies he mailed them to wanted to publish them because his style of writing wasn't what they were looking for at the time. People told him he needed to keep on trying until he found the right people who would love his stories enough to publish them, but he was really getting discouraged because all the ones he had mailed them to didn't think he had what it took to be a great writer. That's when he asked the pastor in his Church for advice. He told him to add some parts about God and His miricals, so that's when he changed his writing style.

The first story he mailed in got no reply, but while he was stewing about that problem, a good-looking man came to his door. When he opened it, the man told him he had come to help him with his stories. Sam was overjoyed to hear hear that. The man told him to write about evil things with lots of horrible events taking place throughout his stories. When Sam asked him his name the stranger told him to call him Lou. Lou convinced him to write some stories about demonic powers that attacked people and made them do all kinds of evil things. Yet Sam didn't know Lou was just short for Lucifer. In other words, the devil.

After his second demonic story that went viral, Lou came to him and said, "You've done great, pal. Now, your part of the deal is give me your soul to keep it going."

Sam was so excited about becoming a published author of demonic stories he thought that was a fair deal. After a high-10, Lou laughed and said, "Remember, no trade back!" then he disapeared in a flash of fire which caught the rug on fire. Sam had to grab a wet rag to put it out. When it was done, his whole living room was either burned up or else it was ruined by the smoke. That caused Sam to really wonder about the deal he'd just made with that Lou dude.

His first book was a best-seller. People loved his evil stories which made him write some more. Each time he had writers-block, he'd call Lou's name and he was right there to give him some terrible events to add on to his stories. That was making him quite wealthy. He felt like he was on top of the world and owned every bit of it. That gave him incentive to write another gross, terrible story about evil charactors winning winning their battles against the Lord and His army of angels. Sam was becoming quite wealthy from writing those awful stories, but people were reading them and were asking him to write more of them.

Then one night after he'd finished writing another terror story, he heard a knock on his door. When he opened it there was a good-looking man standing there. He said, "Hay there, Sam. I heard you were a great author of some awesome terror stories. Well, you need my help to do that. My name is Lou. The people where I'm from love your writing style so I've come to make you be a very rich man."

Sam's grin covered his hole face. "Oh? Tell me more!" he said to the handsome man standing there smiling like a Cheshire cat. "How do you plan on going about that, sir?"

"Allow me to introduce myself," the handsome man said with a bow, "My name is Lou. I've come to see that you can because an awesome writer. I love your style of writing. It's really awesome. All the people where I'm from love your stories too and they'd love to have you write some more of them since they're so awesome. I can give you some great thoughts to write about in your next stories."

Sam's grin covered his whole face. "Oh yeah?" he said, "How did you hear about my books? Have you read them?"

"Of course!" said Lou. Actually, he didn't tell Sam, but his real name wasn't Lou, rather Lucifer, The King Of Darkness. He went on to tell him if he continued writing those stories of terror that he would be payed mega-bucks for them. That sounded great to Sam as he signed a contract which stated that he would write at least one great sorry every 2 weeks and Lou would pay him handsomely for them. That was exactly what Sam had been wanting to hear his whole life, and that guy was sent to help him achieve that goal, so after signing several different papers and paying Lou a great deal of money, he began seeing dollar signs flashing in front of his eyes.

That made him get on his computer right away and start working on his next story of terror since Lou had told him he had a special talent for writing that odd kind of stories.

Within a few months Sam had become quite wealthy like Lou promised he would. That made him write even more terror books about the devil, only in all of them he was the winner of all the problems his characters faced in them.

While Sam was getting to be quite rich by writing and selling those terror books to Lou, he eventually sent him to another person who would pay him even more money for doing the same thing with them. Yet Sam had never read the Bible so he didn't know it said, "The love of money's the root of all evil." Another verse says, "It's easier for a camel to fit through the eye of a needle then a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God." Yet he was so excited about thinking of the things he would do with all that money that would be coming his way he didn't even think about them.

Then one day as he was relaxing in his $400.00 recliner he'd just bought and was watching his new 80 inch big-screen t v while eating caviar, his show went off, but before he could reach for the clicker to see what was on, an add came on for The First Pentecostal Church Of Dan- ville. He liked what the pastor on that commercial said so he went there. It just so happened that the preacher, named Bishop David, was preaching on the verse which said that part about rich men not going to Heaven. That got him thinking, but then Lou suddenly appeared behind him. He said, "Aw, come on Sam, you don't believe that junk about bad things happening to wealthy people, do you?" He said it was such conviction that Sam had to think a few seconds before he said anything. He opened his mouth to speak but before any words came out of it, he heard a new voice of somebody who sounded quite old, but extremely loving say, "Now, Sam, your parents brought you up right. They taught you to always trust your heart when making any major decisions. You need to listen to it now. Imagine what they'd say if you made either choice."

"Flake off!" said the first voice, "You can't tell my man Sam to do something that he doesn't want to do! Now, get behind him, Beelzebub! I rebuke you in Jesus' Name! Go away! I command you to flee right now in Jesus' Name!"

Before Sam could say anything, the 2 got into a fight. That was rather amusing to Sam since he'd never seen an actual fight occur in front of him. As they continued their skirmish, eventually a whole host of people came flying down from the clouds and beet up those who were all fighting to make him do wrong. Eventually the first bunch who wanted him to do what was wrong was beet up by the other ones which sent them screaming into the obyss. Sam was really amused by that scene so he clapped and cheered for the winners. That made them smile as they hugged him. He'd never felt a hug that warm before, so he knew it had to be from the Lord. Then they put out their hands for him to give them all high-5s. Sam knew what the right thing to do was after that. Then he said, "Hay! Wait a minute! I sold my soul to Satin! Doesn't that make me be one of his devils? I followed him cause I thought he was cool! No one told me he was a bad-guy! I'm sorry!"

"Appologizing is the first step towards repentance, Sammy-Boy!" the good angel said and hugged him.

So, like the best-written children's stories of all-time will officially finish up with,

"THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!!"

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The end. By, Cuz Roye.

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