A Guide to Firebirds and Freedom

The world revolved completely around him. It revolved around him, and he knew it. Though, maybe he didn’t.

As science studies, we were both bound to interact in the most prestigious school in all of Irreseus, but it was completely unexpected for the two of us to interact in any way that allowed a friendship, let alone a partnership, to form. Thadeus was popular, and of course, I wasn’t. Just the way these stories go. Irreseus was developing increasing levels of advanced medicinal technologies, at such a rate that it seemed to be almost impossible. And yet, because of this, Thadeus and I both applied to further education at the highest establishment available, New Irreseus University.

The year was 1660, when the parameters of acceptance had finally been widened to include women, and I couldn’t have been any more exhilarated than I was. The day I met Thadeus, I refused to believe any future I had with him, even as my friends pushed me into it. He had long, brow length chestnut hair, infuriatingly long and all too choppy. Pieces of it were clearly longer than the others, signifying that he had cut it himself.

His eyes glimmered with a mischievous light, permitted by smoky grey eyes hidden behind thick, unattractive lenses. I found it incredibly unfair how drastically unattractive his glasses were, when he himself was nearly perfect, if he were to put forward slightly more work on his appearance.

However, his excellent appearance did not make up for his actions. The mischievous light in his eyes shined true in his personality, and he was all too quick to judge others for an incorrect answer or thought. Corrections and critiques were frequently the only thing to come from his mouth, fitting perfectly into the know-it-all archetype many schools have in common. Unfortunately, I had to be stuck with him as a research partner, though, strange as it was, that was exactly what changed the both of us for the better. This was not the simplest procedure though, as we were charged with an unfortunate study that would doom many children in the future, including our own. The study was on a strange new development in animals, as new, strange traits were beginning to make themselves known in a variety of different completely unrelated species. For example, scales on a variety of reptiles were beginning to thin out and grow to be softer with each generation, maintaining the structure and body type of each species while also becoming, or resembling fur. In another instance, feathers began to morph into fire in a particular species of bird, laying threats to many species both in and out of the forest in a way that could not be contained.

These evolutions seemed to be impossible to explain, which is exactly why my research group was supposed to find a cure. But a cure for evolution was entirely impossible to achieve, as it was a naturally occurring phenomenon that happened gradually over several generations, and it was incredibly difficult to locate what had led to the changed phenotypes.

Fortunately, we located one species of largely harmless lizard that had developed one of these unknown characteristics, so we began experimentation on them instead of a more threatening fire bird or other dangerous creature. Initially, we found nothing.

Nothing, until an x-ray of one lizard’s head came back with an anomaly from the control. Additionally, after further examination of the same sample, we found a growth on the lizard's heart. Both growths appear to be completely harmless, aside from the obvious change in physical appearance.

“Whatever can that be?” Thadeus said as he examined it one day. He had such a way of sounding completely mortified and disgusted about everything, even if it didn’t call for it remotely.

“How imbecilic can one be to miss this?” The words tumbled from my mouth before I could stop them, unexpected to myself even though I was the one who said them.

Even more surprisingly though, Thadeus laughed. Not a simple meaningless chuckle either, but a boisterous and loud, full laugh. “I hadn’t realized you thought so much of me, Blythe.” He pressed his lenses further up his nose, though it was completely unnecessary. “I’m curious to find what else you’ve thought. No matter for the moment though. You’ll recall I was absent from the project for the past few days as I was visiting my family for my father’s funeral.”

I was unbelievably mortified after hearing and remembering this. “Oh… I… I’m sorry Thadeus. It slipped my mind.”

“It’s quite alright. My father and I weren’t exactly close.”

I crossed the room and sat on one of the stools near the table and began to point out my findings from the previous days.

“Hmmm… so you believe that the removal of these growths may bring these changes to an end?”

“I do, but that would be quite the laborious process, and we would likely end up simply wiping the species out instead of simply removing it from each individual organism.”

Thadeus stood up without saying anything further, simply reaching into the isolated cage and promptly into the labeled metal drawer.

“I… what in Irreseus are you doing?”

“Experimenting. It’s my job.” Before I could say anything more, Thadeus removed a scalpel from the drawer and sliced effortlessly into the lizard’s skull. I watched in horror, feeling dread sink into my bones. The lizard thrashed against his hold initially, but it was now clearly dead.

“Aye! Stop!” My feet stuck to the floor, even as I willed them forwards.

“Why? We need to isolate the growth so we can test it.”

My feet finally lifted off the ground, moving towards Thadeus, and the deceased animal in his hands. “We need it alive you idiot,” I slapped him across the shoulder, forgetting about the scalpel in his hands, though it didn’t matter, since I avoided it.

”Well. Too late now. We’ll just have to find another one with the same thing.”

“Are you quite serious right now? Gods above you are impossible.”

”I don’t care about what any god thinks about me. All I care about is scientific discovery, and if you don’t find the same thing, then this is no place for you.” His words were cold and hard suddenly, unexpected and jarring to me.

I sighed before I said, “Fine.”

I scanned through our specimen, selecting and placing any others I found with the same organic makeup. All the while, Thadeus raced through the lab, selecting random samples and specimens from what I had set aside. This continued for many weeks, but I never saw or cared to look at what Thadeus was doing. We followed the same patterns, he would go work somewhere in the lab, and I would ask what he needed and when, and he would give simplistic instruction, so I would end up doing something completely different once the first thing was done. Days turned to weeks, and weeks into months.

The end of the school year finally arrived, and we had still yet to find anything. I asked what he had been so focused on many months later, when I had been doing various tedious tasks in the laboratory, only to find he had been placing them in various containers with different elements in their gaseous forms. I had finally sorted the last of the lizards, neglecting to look if any other physical alterations had yet to be discovered. I found him beaming at one particular x-ray, which seemed no different from the others.

His face broke out into a childish grin, shocking considering his normal stern expressions. “Look! Blythe! The growth shrank!”

”Did it? I don’t see any difference from this one to that one.”

“Well, that’s a different specimen. Look at these two!” He pointed at two of the printed papers with both of his hands.

“I mean… I guess?”

Thadeus rolled his eyes, “Look closer.” He moved behind me, grabbing my shoulders and pushing me closer to them.

I leaned over them, finally seeing what he was talking about. “Thadeus! You’ve done it!” I jumped back from the table, forgetting my location at that moment. Awkwardly, I stumbled back into his arms, tripping slightly on his feet, which was enough for me to fall backwards. Unfortunately, it was directly into his arms. My heart raced with the impact, and I now realize I stupidly had largely neglected to eat food that day, which left me faint and nauseated. The excitement had clearly jarred my senses, so the world spun out from under me, but I realized a sturdy someone had been ready to catch me when I initially thought he would have moved out of the way.

Thadeus was not the strongest man, so he unfortunately could not relocate me, but he carefully lowered me closer to the floor rather than letting me fall.

“Blythe? Blythe what’s wrong?” His voice was shockingly stern, surprising me back into my senses to look up at him. His glasses fell off his nose after he tilted his face forward to get a better look at me. “Oh uhhh… sorry.” He picked them up, picking them up off of my abdomen. I blushed with the movement, desperately wishing I had been better able to hide it.

I cleared my throat, longing to get out of this particular situation as fast as was physically possible.

He cleared his throat as well, letting the silence linger and grow for a while longer than he needed, considering I was still resting on his legs. “Right. Allow me to help you up, Blythe.” He settled me on the ground next to him, rising before he offered his outstretched hand to me, which wouldn’t have mattered either way since he wound up pulling me up by my shoulders afterwards.

”Right. Well, I believe I will go home and get some rest now.” I walked towards the exit for the lab, turning around briefly to say, “See you tomorrow then, Thadeus.”

I turned back to see him examining his hands, switching to look at his glasses afterwards as well. “I… Yeah… Have a good evening Blythe.”

I nodded, turning around and leaving, not allowing him to know my racing thoughts. Though, I suppose even if I had stayed, I wouldn’t have been able to make sense of them myself.

Upon reaching my apartment, my flatmate asked me a variety of questions, none of which I heard because my thoughts relentlessly pounded through the walls of my mind. What in Irreseus was that?! Why was my heart thundering against my rib cage so? Why was he looking at his hands? What does any of this mean?

My flatmate finally shook my shoulders, grabbing them almost the same way he had. “Blythe?! What is going on with you?”

“I… uhh…”

“I know that look,” She giggled, confusing me even more than I already was, “My sister’s in love!”

“I… what?” My answer was blank and shrouded in absolute confusion, but things began to align in my head.

“So…? Who is he? Tell me, tell me!”

I didn’t know how to tell her it was the single person I had grown to hate since we began working on the same project months ago, but I didn’t know how not to tell her either. “It’s…” I winced at myself, as my voice sounded weak and small, “It’s Thadeus?”

“What? But I thought you hated him.”

“I did. I still think I do?”

“Hmmm…” She walked around me for a minute, examining me, and pausing occasionally to glean her thoughts over.

“What are you doing?”

The question was obviously pointless, as she finally bursted out, “Well Blythe, you’re in love.”

“Now who’s the scientist here?” My response was sarcastic, but I didn’t care. Life could go unfiltered for my sister.

”You. But I’m the feelings scientist. I’m not a psychologist for nothing.” She laughed again. “So you gonna go tell him or what?”

“No.” I was tired, and had the specific desire to go to bed immediately. I wandered over to our loaf of bread resting on the cutting board and cut myself two slices, sitting on our comfortable armchair afterwards.

“What do you mean no? If you’re sitting here looking like this, then I can’t imagine what he’s looking like right now. Believe me, I know what I’m seeing.”

Before the conversation continued, I heard a resounding knock that echoed through the empty walls in our flat. “Not answering it.” It was a silent competition between the two of us every time there was a knock on our door: battle of wills over who would answer it.

“Fine, but you’re not getting out of this conversation.”

I listened to the old door creak open, laughing at my defeat as I silently prayed for some supernatural force to knock me out so I could avoid my sister for longer. Unfortunately, such a mercy never came. Instead, I heard a voice that was all too familiar.

“Ah. Hullo. Umm… is Blythe home?” Thadeus’s voice lingered in my mind, resonating in my skull.

I called out, “No! Not here!”

“Oh. I see when I’m not wanted then.”

My sister seemed to watch him walk away, but yelled down the street, “Wait! Thadeus! She’s here.”

I groaned to myself, fighting a useless internal battle about running into my room and hiding myself away. I closed my eyes for what seemed to only be a moment, but I came to find it had been several seconds, as I opened my eyes to find Thadeus standing in front of me awkwardly.

Thadeus had in his hands a rather expensive looking bouquet of flowers for the time of year, and had color in his face that I had never seen on him before.

“Oh. Uh. Hello Thadeus.” The interaction was needlessly tense, but I stood to make the distance for eye contact less great.

“I will say this outright, Blythe. If you see no point in what I’m saying, do not hesitate to say so. You are incredibly intelligent, beautiful, and in all honesty, astounding to be around. It was only a week or so ago that I was surprised to find myself falling slowly in love with you. And I understand if you have no desire to initiate a relationship, then I will simply leave these here and allow you to continue our project and your life in peace.”

I had no idea what to say, as this hadn’t been something I had considered as an option for myself as a female in the scientific field in the 1600s.

Thadeus’s face fell, uncertain of what to do in the situation as he obviously had high hopes for this exchange.

“Thadeus… I…” My face fell to the flowers in his hands as tears welled in my eyes. “I want to say yes, I truly do, but…”

His face softened, taking the view in, expecting for it to end in seconds. His voice was infinitely gentle, soft and respectful, “You can say no.”

My thoughts were suddenly overpowered by something else, being my heart pounding loud enough I could hear it in my ears. He was an attractive young man, intelligent and respectful and open, but I couldn’t bring myself to dismiss my career for this. “The world expects so little of women. We’re meant to simply be homemakers and raise our children, so any career we may have had before we get married is null and void afterwards. You can understand if I’m hesitant with this then? It’s… not a no…” I peered up at him again, blinking tears out of my eyes so I could see him clearer.

He was beaming down at me, excitement obvious to anyone who could have seen him. I could tell the words he wanted to say were moving through his head in a way that didn’t allow for them to form into specific sentences.

I felt crazy for saying it, but I found it impossible to say otherwise as my face split into a smile. “Let’s do it.”