Last Memory

The meadow is lush with green shrubs and blooming flowers. The summer haze clouds my vision ever so slightly. The sparkling water in the pond catches my fleeting attention. I feel small again. Like I’m ten years old sitting in my grandpa’s lap on one of his many nature treks. The scene feels oddly familiar. I look up to see my grandpa’s face smiling down at me, his eyes brightened with glee.

His smile slowly disappears as his hand grabs his chest and he winces in pain, falling back on the ground. I hurriedly get up from his lap, tears running down my face with worry but I wake up in a strange room. This is my room. It’s been twelve years. I touch the chain around my neck with his pendant.

“You have to let it go, Frank.” My sister Macy tells me looking at me from the half ajar door.

I can hear the party behind her. A small get together of the family. Clinking of glasses and exchange of nice pleasantries as if they don’t secretly despise each other when they’re alone. Yet my loneliness seems to bother these folks quite a lot.

Macy walks in shutting the door behind her and gives me a warm smile.

“They’re asking about you.” She says.

“They don’t care. They just don’t have anything else to say.” I reply.

“They, are your only family. Don’t forget that.” She tells me. She puts on her winter coat before telling me that I have to host the guests as she heads out to get more beer. All I can do is curse my luck as I follow her orders, wondering why she would even bother hosting a get-together for people that didn’t even bother to show up for our grandpa’s funeral.

The party is in full swing. The dim yellow lights of the house make it depressing. I put on a smile just like I always do. I hold my grandpa’s pendant close to my face, feeling his presence as I walk into the room of familiar strangers. Few cousins, gossiping aunts, drunk uncles, and all their significant others, stare at me with curious gazes, waiting for me to stop and address them. I choose to walk past them, feeling them stare into my soul, my hand tightly gripping my grandpa’s pendant, like I’m clinging to it for life.

I move straight to the charcuterie board and grab a salt cracker. The chatter continues behind me as my eyes land on a burger.

I sit down on one of the lawn chairs in the back porch with a burger in one hand and a glass of wine in the other, greeted by my older cousin Jessie, sitting one of the chairs with a warm smile. She’s the only one that’s been close to Macy and me. After grandpa’s death, the only one to ever show up for my graduation ceremony and Macy’s engagement.

She gently pats my shoulder with a proud smile and tells me how happy she is that I decided to show face to people that I can’t stand. Although her warmth helped me to just settle in front of the pool, eating burgers while people watching, I know that there’s a question in her mind that she’s dying to ask.

“What happened to your job interview last week?” She asks staring at the pool knowing how uncomfortable this subject is for me.

“I got in a cab, the driver hit an old lady, she survived but he got arrested. Had to fill in a witness report. Then took another cab. Guess what happened?” I ask Jessie.

“Flat tire.” She says confidently.

“Wrong. A drunk man tried to get in the cab and they got into a scuffle. The man drew his gun out and shot the driver. I ran.” I tell her, watching her confused face turn into a realization as it hits her that I was part of the infamous shooting incident in New York last week.

Her hand lays on my shoulder as she tells me in a serious tone to go for a spiritual cleanse. “It seems you’re cursed.” She remarks.

Macy walks towards us with the newly bought beer in her hand greeting both me and Jessie.

“Hey misfits!” She shouts handing the beer to Jessie.

The party feels louder and fuller. Everyone seems to be having a jolly old time. As I walk back into the house to grab a sandwich, I feel someone tap me on my shoulder. I turn to face my Aunt Darcy who looks at me hesitantly. I greet her with a smile but after a brief exchange of pleasantries, she pulls me aside into another room.

She looks at me with guilt as she brings out a small basket from under the bed with a blanket covering it.

“I found him outside my house. I can’t keep him cause your uncle is allergic.” She says pulling away the blanket slowly, revealing an adorable ginger kitten asleep in the basket. I take the basket from her, trying to get a better look from different angles.

“Adorable. Macy would love him.” I tell her, reassuring her running mind that the kitten will be well taken care of.

The next few minutes everyone spent time playing with our new pet. We name him Salmon, inspired by my grandpa’s love for salmon. Salmon runs around and chases his own shadow as everyone laughs at him.

Suddenly, a drunk Macy runs up to me spilling her drink all over my shirt. She meekly apologises before scooping up Salmon to take a selfie. I go back to my room to change clothes as all the guests occupy themselves discussing the new member of the family but I feel the familiar pang in my heart that I feel every time we celebrate special moments. That grandpa would’ve loved this.

I change my clothes and walk back out wanting to see salmon. All of a sudden there’s a loud bang in my room. I walk back in to find Salmon at the top of a shelf. Seems he knocked over something. But when my eyes land on the ground, I find grandpa’s pendant laying there shattered.

Out of the pendant came sparkly mist that dissipated few feet away from ground. Macy and Jessie walk into the room and notice the chaos. I look at Salmon broken hearted, but I see a glint of recognition in his eye, as he runs out of the open window.

“Hey!” I shout at him as I run towards the window, not wanting to lose him.

Jessie runs outside trying to get salmon back while Macy just stares at the pendant and back at me. “What was coming out of it?” She asks.

“I don’t know. Maybe some chemical reaction.” I say frantically looking out the window to see if Jessie found him.

Macy walks up to me, resting her hand on my shoulder, then rubbing my back reassuringly. Yet I did not feel as bad as I did before. The heaviness on my chest was gone. There was a small amount of sadness but I slowly felt it get replaced by relief. An acceptance. The kitten’s eyes shined. Like an inner knowing, when he stood on top of the shelf looking at me staring at the pendant.

Jessie comes back announcing that Salmon ran away and we need to search for him. It’s almost morning now when I get an email for a second chance at my missed job interview. I lift my hand up to my neck to hold my pendant and realize that it laid there shattered on my bedroom floor. Yet, instead of feeling empty, I felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders, like grandpa was not just in the pendant, but he is everywhere with me.

Jessie reads the email. “Seems the pendant was cursed. It was holding you back.” She says.

I acknowledge her words with a smile as I think back to the time when my grandpa died.

That day, I had gotten up from his lap in the meadow as he fell back holding his chest. He tried to remove the pendant from his neck but couldn’t. I stood there crying and screaming for help. He passed away looking at the sky with relief on his face, no longer struggling. I picked up his pendant and wore it. I carried the sadness for many years. Close family members spoke of how much I reminded them of him. That grandpa was a good man but had terrible luck. And that my fate seemed similar.

The morning light reached my room through the window, falling on the pendant that sparkled under it. For the first time in many years, I didn’t reach for it, I just smiled and breathed.