Mystic Verse !!!

Tulip, are you ok? Yes, mom. I'm fine. Then, why do you sit here alone? Come and join with me. Together- a play can run: chess board? What’s your opinion? Mom! Thank you. I'm tired. Can you leave me? Plz!!! Ok. sweetheart. You take rest. I will talk with you at dinner time.

Today was such a big day for me- my first day at office. I was so nervous. What a big platform! I don’t know, how long I can sustain here? A suspicion peeps in my mind.

I'm tulip, belong from a middle class family. I want to be a big one by name and fame. I have some limitations. I can’t decorate myself any artificial way. I love myself, who I am actually in real sense. A simple marigold, not a black rose or diamond!!! After my graduation from architecture, I have tried for a good job. My first interview was in a local company. I passed the written exam very nicely. And the viva board also pleased by my performance but one objection, I could imagine – I was not so smart as per decorum. A scary sight was peeping in my mind. When I was called to take the appointment letter, I was surprised and felt so happy- by receiving that. Then, the HR officer called me in the isolated room and said- “plz! try to adapt our daily decorum- specially your dress up”. I mean, you’re going to work in a big company and you know the rest. The top authorities don’t allow such shabby attire; so be careful.

I surprise but reply –ok, I will try. I have some ques in mind- Am I look so bad? Am I not smart? I will not be allowed to wear hijab. I am astonished. That’s the first time, I feel hopeless. I pray to God to help me. And make my mind that I will definitely quit this platform, at any time. I prepare myself for the goodbye words but that’s not going as per my wish.

At home, when I was thinking about this, Suddenly mom screams: Tulip, come on dear. I can’t move my hands. I run and see- mom is crying. I tell mom- don’t cry. I call doctor. He comes and gives some medicines and tests, to do as soon as. So much money is required. I stuck in a jinx.

My mother was a school teacher. My father was dead during my childhood . From that time, mom spends her whole life for me. Now it’s my turn to give and take care mom.

Next day, I am going to office- so early; as nobody is there. I go to my cabin. Now, take a deep breath. I love to wear hijab. I never think myself, within all, without hijab. It hurts me a lot. My heart bleeds. I’m doing my work. Suddenly, a foreigner comes and asks me- who are you and where are the new engineer? I’m shocked and answer politely: yes, I’m. How can I help you? He is surprised- you!!! little child, engineer???  He laughs and goes away. He is the son of chairperson, has come from London, a few days ago. It’s such an insulting comment, I must quit this job. How can I???

Mom was so sick. I must take care of her. But it’s difficult for me, to continue the job, as a scary one. I’m not satisfied. I'm so qualified but that’s not a matter now. I make my mind and write a resignation letter. I tell myself – I always try my best to adapt and give the answer- for any bad situation but definitely, I will continue till to find a new good job.

In this way, my time is running so fast. Mom can’t make her health as a healthy way. I can’t share my problem with anyone. What can I tell? I have my own personality but the private job sector-set some rules for their strong platform. It can’t twist. Whether I twist or quit, is totally my decision. This duality hurts me a lot. I try to adapt but I can’t use my whole heart. Six (06 )months are passed.

After that, one morning- I get the golden opportunity from a multinational company. I face the viva board bravely. They like my confidence and give me the appointment letter. It acts as a magic. I get so relief. At last, I can quit from that suffocated job. This new company- also so big and well decorated. The most important thing is they never ask ques about my personal things. I give my heartfelt thanks to God. They like my potentiality and courageous heart to work." They give me the position of in-charge. And tell-though you are a newbie but the motto is to lead the group passionately. We need a courageous one. And we hope that you have such a supreme power to beat that position perfectly. I tell politely- My pleasure!!! Dear sir, thank you so much." Now, my life turns to a new realm, with freedom verses. Nothing can block the way to move onward. If any scary scene comes, I will try heart and soul to beat that obstacle.

I can recall that moment, when I stuck such a devastation condition; I can’t get any way and blame the fate---

"I once had a lovely heart

That dragged me into desert

Inhaling specks of spiritless mirth

Every time I took deep breath.

I once had a mind of magic canvas

Using the eternal hues

Discovering the meaning of abstract art

That we learn after meeting with beautiful mind

I once had a mind of special concern

With every lesson that I gained

Until I had a traumatized condition

To let my confidence go back

But the world is going as usually

Without thinking anything else "

I, then, get up and stand up in front of mirror. I see myself as a new way. I'm not a timid one. I can try until my last breath. I’m a soldier. I can conquer the daily war. Quit!!! isn’t a solution but if there’s any further opportunity, far- far better then before one; it will be well accepted. I’m doing that as usually and I rewrite the diary of my life as a fairytale.

After the job, I'm relax. Now, mom also doing well. I have a friend circle. My best friend is a rich one. He has some bad habits. I try to hold him in a right tract but it’s quite impossible. He always wants to solve any problem by money. I told him so many times-" plz! try to understand, money can’t solve all problems. You can't buy peace by that . He is not ready to listen me".

I was fade up. I thought to stay away from all by saying some goodbye words. Ok. Bye- bye. But I couldn’t. He was like a psychopath. He never saw and felt the real life’s essence-the practical world is so painful for most of the people. So, he was like that one.

But how can I manage? Now I’m very busy with my job and my mom. I have no more time to think about all of those things. I want to quit from the tangled form, yet can’t. I feel so sorry. What a mysterious this life in earth!!!