The Reformed Bully

Lina had always been a bully.

Ever since I transferred to this school years ago, she’s been a thorn in my neck. I never understood why she chose me of all people as her main victim, but once she did, her two minions made sure to annoy me even when she wasn’t there. This year, though, both of them dropped out for different reasons that I didn’t care to know, and Lina began to act weird.

If I thought the bullying had been bad, her current behavior was plain insufferable.

“Heyyy, there you areee!” her sing-song voice made my skin crawl.

“What do you want?” I snapped.

“Just to check on you, bestie!”

“Bestie…?”

She giggled obnoxiously and took me by the arm. As I was trying to wiggle my way out of the unwelcome touch, she dragged me into the canteen.

“You’re sitting with us today! Well… with me!”

“No, I’d prefer not to…”

“There’s a nice table near the window!”

“Can you let me go?”

I was pretty sure I didn’t say “push me aggressively onto the bench and run off,” but that was exactly what she did. I folded my arms on the table and rested my forehead on them with a long-suffering sigh. My stomach growled, but my energy levels protested against any kind of movement, so I resigned myself to making due with the protein bar — I always had one in my bag exactly for such cases.

But Lina only took a minute to come back, and when she did, she had my favorite order on the tray near her own food.

“How do you know what I like?”

“Don’t friends always remember each other’s preferences?”

“Have you been spying on me?”

She made an offended face.

“Spying?! I was just trying to be helpful!”

I had to admit to myself, albeit begrudgingly, that I was grateful for the food. But when I tried to say it, my throat closed up so badly that I needed to drink some juice before attempting to eat my turkey sandwich.

“So, what are we doing after school?” Lina piped up.

“I have no idea what you are doing, but I am going to the library to study.”

“Oh, right, of course! Doing homework together is always more fun!”

“I didn’t expect that to be your definition of fun… Hold on, did you say together?”

“You can help me with math, and I’ll help you with… Uh… Art!”

“I’m terrible at math, and I don’t need help with art.”

“Oh… Well, then we’ll just… We’ll figure it out!”

“You know, maybe I’ll simply go home after all…”

Lina looked at me questioningly, but before she could invite herself for a sleepover at my place, I was saved by the bell. I never thought I’d be thankful for the end of a lunch break, but here we were.

I did go into the library after classes. Not because I wanted to keep being around Lina, but because I was sick of her making me avoid places. I used to skip school because of her bullying, and now I had to go home earlier because she suddenly decided to creep me out with her inexplicable burst of friendliness? No way. I put my headphones on and hid myself in my favorite secluded corner where I hoped she wouldn’t find me. An irritating hand waving in front of my face broke those hopes before I could indulge in them.

“I’ve been calling you, but you don’t hear anything with those things on!” She shouted in my ear, taking my headphones off without permission.

“This is a library. You’re supposed to be quiet here.”

“Oh, right… Then we’ll just study quietly side by side?”

That was surprisingly not that terrible of a prospect, so I nodded.

A few minutes passed in the silence as I pretended to read the history book, but I wasn’t retaining anything. I shouldn’t have cared about Lina’s strange change of heart. She wasn’t anyone worth worrying about. And yet, I couldn’t help but steal curious glances at her now and again.

“What do you want from me?” I heard myself ask.

She looked at me, feigning confusion.

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“You know damn well what I mean.”

“I really don’t understand…”

“Bullshit.”

Lina flinched. She’s never heard me curse before. I normally didn’t. But this whole situation must’ve been getting on my nerves more than I thought.

“What did I do wrong?” Lina wondered pathetically.

"Nothing, and that's the problem! Why are you being so nice all of a sudden? What do you have to gain from it?"

Lina bit her lip.

"I thought you said we should be quiet in the library..." She muttered, and the return of her usual venomous tone was, strangely, almost relieving.

"Then let's go somewhere else."

"No. I don't want us to scream at each other."

"There you go again, acting like..." I gestured vaguely in her direction. "...like this. Like you're a nice person all of a sudden."

"That's because I've changed!"

"Changed? Ha, as if!"

"But I have!" She struggled not to raise her voice again. "I've been doing everything right, acting friendly and trying to be helpful, all because I wanted us to leave our misgivings behind and-"

"Our misgivings?!" I interrupted, closing my book loudly. "Don't act like it was ever a mutual thing! You just hated me for no reason!"

"Clearly, you don't like me very much either, judging from how you're acting now even though I'm not being mean anymore..."

"Yeah, anymore." I repeated mockingly. "But that won't erase all the years of relentless ridicule you and your sidekicks have put me through. You can't pretend none of that happened and expect me to play along. That's not how it works."

Lina didn't answer at first. For a few long moments, she just stared at her lap. Then she nodded jerkily and mumbled something that sounded like "I see" before running off. And somehow, I was left feeling like I was the bully now.

Lina didn't bother me the next week, and by Friday I almost found myself missing her. But I reminded myself that it had all been an act anyway. She felt lonely now with no subordinates by her side, and was trying to make me into her next pushover by tricking me into liking her. But I knew better than to fall for it. That was the only explanation that made sense, until I found a letter in my locker.

"I'm sorry," it read. "It feels awkward to start a letter with an apology, but I really owe you one. Mostly for how I treated you before, but also for trying to force my friendship on you afterward without ever asking if you wanted me to. You were right, I hoped we could just act as if nothing happened, because owning up to my regrets felt scarier. After all, that would mean you could choose not to forgive me. It was wrong of me to try and pretend that wasn't your decision to make. I understand if you never want to talk to me again, and I won't try to approach you anymore. I only hope you can believe that I sincerely wish I had never been mean towards you. You didn't deserve that."

The letter ended just as abruptly as it started, and I felt my eyes sting for some strange reason. I folded the paper neatly and tucked it into the pocket of my jacket. As I was on my way home, I overheard one girl whispering to another that she peeked into Lina's phone. From her words, it seemed like Lina was planning to take part in some anti-bullying campaign online. It was only a rumor. But it made me think that maybe, just maybe, Lina and I could eventually have our enemies-to-friends arc after all.