how the stories go

I storm into the room with my hands on my hips. "You have so much explaining to do." I shout fuming. It takes a second for my eyes to adjust but if that is curious it doesn't register with me at all. He grabs my wrist and pulls me closer to his chest. I begin to try and yank my hand away but his worried eyes and the look he gives me when I step into the room stop me short "What's going on?" I ask oblivious to the darkness in the room. "Shhhh." Alex says finger to my lips, "We're not alone." I stomp my foot indignantly muttering "Huh?, what do you mean.?" against his finger. He silently points to the window pointing and I raise an eyebrow "Really?" I whisper mostly to keep him happy but a little cause i'm starting to get concerned too. Though I would never admit it. "They can't possibly be watching us." He raises an eyebrow and somehow manages to whisper sarcastically without raising his constants "Really? You of all people should know that isn't true." I sigh. I do know it isn't true but I do like to believe. "Well unlike you I believe in the good of humanity." I retort knowing full well how pathetic it sounds. And I swear to you i'm not usually this for lack of better word preppy. I'm in my opinion more of a Veronica Mars, a Lucy Gray, a Paedyn Gray. Not this preppy, sunshine and lollipops type at all. I just can't believe that they would be responsible for this, deep down i know that it's true though I knew the second that first letter came leaving me speechless heart on the floor. I still remember the feeling of hope and fear that came with that letter. Nothing though could have prepared me for this. Although this is a rich kid school, me and Chris are probably the only middle class people. Not that that's a bad thing it's just tiring trying to be someone you're not all the time. I am suddenly so tired I start to close my eyes and drift off, he slaps my face gently but tough enough to leave a sting. "Hey, wake up." I want to I really want to. It's just that sleep seems so nice right now. "Don't go." he mutters into my hair, "remember what we don't have anyone else left." that jerks me back to my adrenaline fueled alertness. "I won't" I mumble. He looks up at me with a grin. "You're awake..." I shove my head back into the hood of his hoodie, embarrassed that I still haven't given it back yet. "Of course, kinda hard not to be with you breathing down on me like that." He chuckles then turns suddenly serious, "It takes a special kind of person to still be able to joke after something like this." I frown "It isn't that hard, i've been doing it all my life." He shakes his head "I know and that's why I need to get you out." I snicker growing hysterical "Out? Out how?" I take a deep breath trying to keep my voice down "I'm trapped, i've always been trapped, it was stupid to think I could get out." I've never been able to before why start now!" Alex presses his hands against my face. "Now, don't you talk like that." Wow, he really never knows when to give up does he? "I'm just being realistic!" I whisper-shout into his deaf ears. "Well, stop that." He sighs. "What would Hailey do?" That question stops me short knocking the wind out of my lungs "Don't you dare bring Hailey into this." I say in a quietly aggressive tone. "You made me, Be a little happier please. " He sighs while running his hands through his hair. "She wouldn't have been so pessimistic." I fight the urge to flip him off, he's right. I roll my eyes at that. of course he's right. He is like Hailey's spirit reincarnated in a boy's body. "Fine." I say then take a beat, putting on the most chipper happy face I could possibly do. "Hi, We are going to die.!" I say smiling. "better?" Alex frowns "That was uncanny." Then without warning he kisses me, soft not hard but enough to say that he knows one of us won't make it out. "You'll be fine." He says stroking my face. I try hard to fight the tears in my eyes "what about you?" I cry making me sound so pathetic. "I've got no one else." he states reaching a finger to my lips to cut me off "You got so much more than me." With that he steps out, opens the window screaming "Get me you jerk, not her!" and the gun cracks or maybe it is my scream. Leaving silence with the exception of me sobbing in the room. I crawl to the boy with the chocolate hair that saved me, desperately trying to revive his soul "Please, Please get up." I'm not concerned about the shooter coming back all I want is Alex. Alex with the charming grin, the flirtatious smile, and the concerned gestures. I want him back. I want him back. I sob into his still-warm hands. "Please come back." I whisper. The next few months maybe years go by in a blur, trials, testimonies, confessions. I don't pay attention to any of it. Whenever I try I just go back to that day. The shot, the kiss, the scream my scream, the blood, and I can't. The people pretend they understand, all their sympathetic looks and gestures. They don't. They don't know what it's like to have the one person who stitched you back together choose to go away. I never should have told him about the letter. That is the moment I would do over if I could. I may have died but at least it would of kept him safe.