Better in Red

Ten hands tended to every inch of my body as I stood on the pedestal before a full-length mirror. In unison, my bridesmaids stepped back and admired me with gasps and covered mouths. Or, at least I think it was me. It could have been my royal white wedding dress. Nevertheless, it was bumped up to a ranking of eleven once I got into it. The ladies smiled at their great work; all thanks to my instructions, they had no choice but to follow. But I’ll let them have this victory.

“Girl, you look incredible,” one of them said. My eyes fixed on myself, so I didn’t know who it was. 

“Maxwell is a lucky man, Jade,” another said.

“You damn right he is.” I arrogantly replied. 

Maxwell wasn’t my first choice by any means, but he was a very nice guy I happened to care about. His good heart never faltered as life seemed to give him bad luck. Truthfully, he’d be better off with a cute little housewife who made him breakfast and called him ‘honey’. But that’s not me, and never would be. The thought of being so useless made me sick. I could give him a good life, but not at the sacrifice of my independence and happiness. I’m going to run my businesses, drink with my girlfriends, and buy what I wanna buy. However, I will always come home to him so he knows he’s still my husband. The least I can do.

“Alright, ladies, can you give me a minute?” I asked them, though it came off as a command. “I wanna get in the right headspace.”

“Of course, girlie.”

“See you out there, girl.”

“We love you, Jade,” they all shouted.

All five of them exited, and I stayed looking in the mirror, silence being my only company—finally, some peace. 

You’re about to be a bride, girlie. You earned this. 

“Did you, though?” 

I turned my head around violently to look behind me. I had no clue where that voice came from.

“Hello?” I said nervously. “Who’s there?”

“I mean, this dress is pretty basic. White? I think you’d look better in red.”

I frantically searched the room for someone, anyone who was speaking to me. No way I was going crazy now, on my wedding day!

“Where are you?” I raised my voice out of frustration.

“Look in the mirror, bitch!”

Sure enough, I turned back to the mirror, and I saw myself. Me, in a jean jacket and pants. My hair was in a ponytail instead of the curls I specifically asked for. I wore a black shirt that showed my belly button, which was strange because I haven’t pulled that look off since my first year in college. We looked at each other for a while; I was speculating, but this younger version was disgusted with what she saw.

“Oh, I must be going insane,” I said to my reflection.

“We both know you are already insane.” 

This freaky witch talked back to me…with sass! I couldn’t stop shaking my head and closing my eyes. 

“You are not real. This is not real, I…” I tried some quick breathing exercises. “We don’t have time for this, Jade. You’re just nervous on your wedding day. That’s all. ”

“Wow, I guess we stay in the denial phase.”

So much for self-reassurance. 

“Who the hell are you?” I angrily asked my reflection.

“Who do you think I am? I’m the ‘real’ you.” 

“Bullshit. It’s just my mind playing tricks on me. Doing the classic ‘the kid still alive inside’ trick I see in rom-coms.” 

An almost evil laugh escaped her. “Oh girlie…this is far from a rom-com; much more of a horror/thriller situation.”

My eyes squinted with confusion. “So you’re like an evil spirit here to kill me on my special day? Did one of the guests practice some dark magic before coming here?”

“If anything is evil in this room, it’s you,” the reflection said. “And that makes me evil by association. Thanks a lot.”

I didn’t know why, but my hands started fidgeting at her answer. Why would she say something so cryptic? She stood there, arms crossed and a straight attitude on her face.

“I’ll ask you again, girlie. Did you earn this? Do you believe you earned him?”

“Of course I did,” I said, frustrated. “And Maxwell…well...he gets to marry me, which is what he worked for.”

“‘Worked for’? Oh, I didn’t know he was one of your most valued employees.”

“That’s not what I meant.” I snapped back. “And sorry, I just need to clear this up. What do I call you? Because you are not me.”

“I am you!” Her neck strained as she corrected me. “But to save the exhaustion of your elementary brain, call me Little Jada.”

Huh..Little Jada. That’s what my annoying uncle called me until his untimely death five years ago. My parents continue the tradition out of love, unfortunately, as do my cousins, who took it as an opportunity to tease. This thing, it hated me and wanted me to know it. But I wasn’t going to let it get to me. Not today.

“Alright, ‘Little Jada’, what are you doing here?”

“I’m here to remind you what you are,” she said. Her eyes didn’t blink once. “And in return, I want you to accept it.”

“I know who I am. Seeing that you are a younger version of me, you should be thankful for what you become.

“Oh, I actually haven’t taken a moment to admire you. My apologies.” Jada’s sarcastic tone was starting to irk me. “Give us a three-sixty.”

I did as she asked and added my own sass, making sure she saw every stitch of this gown. I imagine I looked like a ballerina in one of those music boxes, twirling around in an exaggerated pose. 

“Well, well, Jade, I have to say we are sexy.”

“Thank you, I dedicate at least four hours…”

“Oh, I can’t get over that waistline. Your hips.” Jada interrupted. “Professor Cole would have definitely given us an A if you had them then.”

I turned back to face her, looking even more confused. Why would she say that? Bringing up my perverted professor who tried too many times for some free touches. Did I use it to my advantage? Of course I did. 

“Our body could do some wonders. Now, I feel like you’re giving away the secrets.”

“I’m not one of those whores in college,” I retorted. “I’m a grown woman who knows how to get what she wants.”

Little Jada laughed, struggling to get her words out. “No, you just don’t sleep with them or give out special gifts anymore. Just being present and…revealing gets you anything.”

“If you are just here to ridicule me about the past, I’mma need you to try harder.”

Her posture reset to a strong, assertive stance. Arms crossed with no smile at all. “Fine. I’m going to ask you again. Do you deserve Maxwell?”

“Of course not,” I answered with a cocky smile. “I deserve so much more. But having Maxwell is alright for now.”

“And does he deserve you?”

“I’m everything he needs and more. You’ve seen the look in his eyes, I assume. He feels like the luckiest man on Earth.”

Jada’s head tilted as if she was working something out. Her upper lip flexed just a bit to show her disdain. It was a little concerning.

“Does he know what you said to his friends?”

This froze me in place. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Kinda sad none of them accepted your wedding invitation. Especially Harper.”

I began sinking my nails into my palm the further she went on. 

“She was his best friend,” Jada said.

“She held him back. I consider it a favor,” I said. “And before you bring anyone else up that I made him cut off, please remember, Maxwell would not be where he is now without me.”

Jada glared at me with her nostrils flaring. I kind of thought she was gonna jump out of the mirror and attack me. Unfortunately, what she said next was worse than I could ever imagine. 

“Is that what you said to Becca too? That she held him back?”

I couldn’t speak a word. I couldn’t move. This little brat got to me. She went on berating me.

“Oh, don’t tell me we forgot about Becca? The love of his life. The crush he really wanted. And, surprisingly, the enemy you befriended when you became desperate.”

“Tha…that’s not true,” I stuttered like I had stage fright. “She was not a good person either.”

“Oh no! Of course not,” Jada’s provoking voice weakened any defense I had. “She was the best person!”

“Shut up.”

“We saw how she treated Maxwell, how she respected Maxwell. And we couldn’t live with that. Hell, with a little more time, they probably would have gotten together. And that sickens you.”

“I said, shut up.” I couldn’t look at her anymore, so I tilted my head upward and closed my eyes, hoping to shut her out.

“But we weren’t going to be overshadowed by her, were we? Nah, we had to keep Maxwell as our little pet forever.”

Still silent.

“So what did we… Scratch that! What did you do?” Jada raised her voice. “Watched a few episodes of Olivia Pope and all of a sudden you know how to cause a scandal?”

My body trembled. I’d never been so rattled physically. And who else could have done it but me? 

“Enough!” I shouted.

“You’ve ruined her life! And you’re about to ruin his if you don’t get your way.” Jada unfolded her arms and opened her hands, revealing fresh blood dripping to the floor. “I wonder if he’ll end up with the same fate.”

A light red stain appeared in the middle of my stomach, seeping through my white dress. It grew redder and spread out across my entire midsection. It trailed down to the flowy skirt and grew heavier, as if I'd jumped into a pool after prom. I attempted to wipe the blood off in a panic, but it only stained my skin, making me look like Carrie. I looked back at Jada; she too was drenched in blood and stared straight into my soul.

“Her blood will always be on your hands. No dress will ever cover it up.”

The disgust I felt all over my body, along with the piercing words pouring out of her mouth. I couldn’t take it anymore. 

“You’re not real. This is not real!” I screamed until all the air escaped my lungs. “Leave me alone!”

Just then, the door burst open. One of my bridesmaids rushed in, panting, and somehow still holding her bouquet. 

“Jade! What’s wrong? Who are you talking to?” 

I looked back at the mirror; now I only saw me. A gorgeous bride in an even more gorgeous dress. No blood in sight. And thankfully, no ‘Little Jada’ to hate on her future.

“No one. I’m…perfectly fine,” I answered with a somewhat forced smile. “Could you please give us…me five more minutes?”

She didn’t answer, just nodded and backed out of the door she had exploded through. I gave the mirror one more flashy 360 before stepping down. I walked closer to my reflection, waiting for it to jump.

“You’re not going to get me under my skin. Be grateful I got us this far.” I said, then turned to exit the room. Before I touched the nob, that ungrateful voice came back.

“That dress will look better in red sooner or later, girlie. Enjoy our big day.”