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Viga Boland

Author on Reedsy Prompts since Apr, 2022

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153 Followers
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32 Stories

1870 karma pts

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Turnip Park Library’s Interior Public Washroom

Weekly Contest #321

<Dedicated to the members of the Turner Park Writer’s Group with special thanks for the inspiration to Anita Joldersma & Dr. Michael Williams.> Welcome to your newly renovated Turnip Park Library Interior Public Washroom. I am delighted that you have decided to try out this new facility. What can we help you with today? Um…who are you? Where are you? Can you see me? No, I can’t see you but I can sense you. So I am alone in this washroom, right? This IS a private washroom, isn’t it? Well, actually, it’s a public washroom in a public...

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AGING GRACEFULLY…OR NOT!

Weekly Contest #317

<Remembers the Banters? Yes, they’re still alive and back to lighten your day with some dialogue-only humor. Comments welcomed and appreciated. Enjoy!> Matthew, I’m really pissed off! Christophe? Who’s Christophe, Martha. I’ve never heard of him. Oh Lord, give me strength! Matthew, turn up your hearing aid for heavens sake. I’m two feet away from you and you can’t hear me? Or is it you don’t want to hear me? Which one? Martha give me a minute, love, to adjust my hearing aid and catch up with you. I’m sitting here quietly, reading my p...

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THE SHOEBOX

Weekly Contest #300

Enough is enough Julie decided. I’m old and I’m cranky, and today I’m crankier than usual. I’m sick to death of everyone telling me what to do and not do, what to eat, when to go to bed…next thing they’ll be telling me when to fart and where! After 80 years on this earth, I think I know my way around. Julie grabbed her favorite cardigan from where she’d tossed it on her favorite recliner and pulled it on over a light summery dress. Just in case it gets a bit cooler toward 5. I probably won’t be out that long as I’ll need to be back to make...

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The Ladies of Loretto

Weekly Contest #299

I'm scared shitless! Hundreds of girls dressed exactly as I am in dark navy serge uniforms, black stockings, stiff white plastic collars and cuffs and black Oxford shoes. Their Oxfords shine; mine are scuffed. So typically me. It's September 1960. Like penguins on parade, we are lined up, waiting for the doors to open on the next four years of our lives in the holy halls of Loretto College School for young ladies. One small problem: I do not feel like a lady and don't think I want to be one. It sounds boring. I don't belong here. I'm j...

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NAMELESS

Weekly Contest #290

***mild suggestion of child abuse*** Grazyna wandered down the deserted street. There were no children around. It was too early yet, she decided, for the Australian mums to let their children play outside after school and most Australian fathers were probably still at work. In Grazyna’s case, neither parent was at home. Amongst other names her Australian classmates called her, they dubbed her that foreign “latch-key kid”, and their mums were reluctant to let their darlings play with her. After all, you never knew about these European im...

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AFTER THE STORM

Weekly Contest #288

The conference had been a resounding success for everyone… everyone but me. I should’ve listened to that little voice inside that questioned why I was being given a beautiful suite to myself for the weekend.“But I’ve always had to share on these conference weekends,” I said to Yvette, the State manager. “Is Stella getting her own suite too?” Stella was the regional manager for the southern part of the state while I handled the North.“No,” Yvette replied with a slight quaver in her voice. “She and I will share my suite this time. We still hav...

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Midnight Call

Weekly Contest #284

The call came a little after midnight. Alana grabbed the phone on the first ring. Her mother was a light sleeper and needed her rest. “Oh good! You’re still up,” Moira chirped. “Are you still available for that Hong Kong gig?” Alana’s heart started racing. Was Moira about to answer her prayers? “Of course!” She replied, a little breathless from the pounding and hope in her heart. “Well you’ve got it kid, provided you can get everything you need packed in a hurry. You’ll have to get yourself to the airport by this Friday.” “Oh my God!” Alana ...

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Liar, Liar

Weekly Contest #281

<only mild suggestion of childhood mental abuse>I watch her now as she carefully lowers herself into what she hopes will be a comfortable chair for at least half an hour. Only I notice the wince that escapes her lips before she plasters on her best smile for the family. It’s Christmas. Only tidings of comfort and joy today, please and thank you.“Are you ok, Grandma?” 12-year-old Emily asks. “Would you like a cushion for your back?”She shoos Emily away gently with assurances she is fine. Liar, liar, pants on fire! That’s what I use...

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TALK FOR TWO

Weekly Contest #280

<The Banters are back! We hope you’ve missed their silly bantering. They’ve been gone a long while but they couldn’t resist a dialogue-only prompt…their favorite writing style! Enjoy!>Matthew, do you think I’m frumpy?Do I think you’re grumpy, Martha? Sure, sometimes…No, Matthew. I asked if you think I’m frumpy. FR not GR! Geez, I swear that new hearing aid we got you is no better than the previous one, and this one cost a fortune.I can’t help it Martha if they don’t make hearing aids that are perfect for my ears! You speak so fast and ...

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PARADISE LOST or FOUND?

Weekly Contest #248

That went well. Don’t you agree? I do. So simple. Quick. Painless. Good for you. You certainly made the right decision.  Yes, I know I did, although it wasn’t easy. The children fought with me for months before they finally accepted that I’d made up my mind…as I’ve done all my life. I understood their viewpoint but this time, I had to do what was right for me, even if it hurt them. I wish I had done likewise. Instead, I let mine convince me to do this or try that. They talked about the benefits of one option over another and even they c...

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BROMO ECLIPSE

Weekly Contest #245

**The Banters are back and Martha’s not happy about that eclipse!**Martha, is something wrong? You seem really out of it tonight. Did I upset you in some way that I don’t know about?No, Matthew. It’s not you…Phew. Glad to hear that. It usually is me. Well, since I’m lousy at reading minds, especially yours, what’s up?Oh I’m just BROMO today.BROMO? You need a Bromo? I’m not sure we have any. Want me to check?No Matthew. You’re thinking of Bromo Seltzer and it hasn’t been available in the US since 1975 because one of the ingredients was consid...

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TOTAL ECLIPSE of MY HEART

Weekly Contest #245

**possible sensitive content: sudden, unexpected death of an adult child**Dear Nancy,As I sit here lost in thought on the eve of the total eclipse of the sun, I’m trying to think about something funny or witty about tomorrow’s big event, but nothing is coming to me. There’s just nothing funny on my mind right now.So I turn to poetry instead. I write a catchy line about the sunset cremating the sky over the ocean at Pescadero. I saw that “cremation” decades ago when death was the furthest thing from my much younger mind. And then your email a...

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BANTER BLOOPERS

Weekly Contest #244

Matthew, do you recognize this photo?Should I?Yes. After all, you took it!I didn’t take that! Why would I take a photo of what looks like a small bowl of half-eaten raspberry jello?Because you often take photos of food or other things I’ve never thought worth the effort. I’ve always found that a tad weird. Oh I know. I know. Don’t say it. You’re a photographer and see photos where others, like me, just see objects. But that said, how do you know it’s raspberry if you don’t even remember taking it? Like, maybe it’s strawberry jello?Well, what...

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Wandering Weird Loo-vres

Weekly Contest #242

***The Banters have finally been prompted to bicker-banter again as they move toward their goal of getting enough banters together for a little book. Inspiration sure takes its time striking these days LOL.*** Hey Matthew. You won't believe this! What wouldn’t I believe? Well, this just seems so ridiculous. Like, how do people get locked in museums overnight? Um…they were taking a dump in the washroom when the museum closed? Oh, aren’t you the clever one? Now, how did you figure that out? That, apparently, is one of the most common reasons....

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A BAD CASE OF APOSIOPESIS

Weekly Contest #238

What’s more confusing than Abbott and Costello with “Who’s on first.”? The Banters of course, especially when Martha comes down with a bad case of APOSIOPESIS! Matthew! It’s happened again!What’s happened again?I’m…er…stuck.Stuck? Stuck where? In traffic?In my…ah…In your car? In a …Bar?No…I can’t say it!Say what?What I’m trying to say.What are you trying to say?I don’t…um…For heavens sake, spit it out woman. What’s the matter? Cat got your tongue?I wish…I wish…Wish what? I wish I had more…um…more…Money? We don’t need more money.No,...

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