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Stevie B

Author on Reedsy Prompts since Oct, 2020

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52 Stories

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Flotsam & Jetsam & Lagan & Derelict & The Pets

Weekly Contest #140

I remember his death as if it had occurred only yesterday. Everything pretty much changed in my life the day after my dog killed himself.Months before it happened, and the warning signs were clearly visible, we could see he was not his old tail wagging, tongue lolling, happy-go-lucky self. He was so unhappy. So what did we do? All we did was say things like “Good dog! Good dog! Who’s a good dog?” to him and completely ignored, or just really didn’t want to see, all the obvious symptoms that accompany extreme canine depression. Then one day h...

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Six Shades of Splendid

Weekly Contest #136

Saturday had already turned out to be six shades of splendid and it wasn’t even 9 A.M. yet. To begin with, he had rolled out of bed this morning with nary an ache or a pain throughout his entire body. Now that was a welcomed rarity at his age. Then there was the fact that he wasn’t feeling the least bit hung-over. Even after a fun-filled Friday night of heavy drinking and ingesting some cannabis edible in the form of a passion fruit flavored lollipop which purportedly contained a whopping 66 milligrams of THC. Next, after brushing his teeth ...

61 likes 17 comments 17
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Mama, You Stole My Heart

Weekly Contest #131

There are many who begin life bearing the misconceived impression that their parents would always love and understand them. Then there are those who are equally deluded in their impression that children they conceived and raised would one day conform and turn into the person they may have wanted...The box was returned in the mail many weeks after sending it. Inside was a handwritten card atop the soft fur wrap I had sent. The card in my mother’s handwriting simply stated, “Since I don’t know how you got this, and because I’m not sure, I can’...

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Sailorman Jack

I’ve been privileged to know a lot of crazy people in my lifetime. One of the craziest was Sailorman Jack. When my first wife and I moved back to the USA from Belgium in 1976 we decided to take up residence in New York City. NYC was dirtier and more dangerous in those days than it is today (which may be debatable), but apartment rents in Manhattan were still higher than in most places and the job market was tighter. Having had some success with my recording career in Europe, I’d hoped to use that to my advantage in The States, but ’76 was th...

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Bobby and The Baked Alaskans-Masters of Supersonic Awesomeness

Whoa—what up muzak lovers? Up here in Alaska, we have a lot of famous things going on. For instance; we’re the biggest state of all the United States of America, the state that’s both the most northern and the most western state in the United States of America, the most sparsely populated state in the United States of America, and one day me and my band, Bobby and The Baked Alaskans, are going to be famous too. Not just here in the USA but all over the whole world too. Oh, BTW—I’m Bobby and I’m in a real band with The Baked Alaskans! Know wh...

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First Love

Over the course of countless years, while being professionally involved in the entertainment industry, I’ve sat for many interviews. The inevitable question that almost always arises is “What first attracted you to making music?” The record companies I recorded for usually had publicists on the payroll to prompt those signed to the label roster on how to respond to such inquiries. So, my consistent answer when asked was, “Well, music has always been my first love.” But, that was a lie. Do you really want to know the reason why I make music? ...

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Happy Birthday, Jesus!

Weekly Contest #126

Well, you thought you've had a difficult year!People worry all about the wrong things for all the wrong reasons. For instance, take the Christmas Crusaders (yes, please take those Christmas Crusaders for a very long walk on a very short pier!). The folks who take umbrage if you commit the holiday faux pas of wishing them Happy Holidays! Come on now, the holidays are difficult enough as they are. I mean, with holiday shopping, attending holiday family affairs, watching as-stale-as-last-season’s-fruitcake holiday reruns on TV, the headaches of...

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Officer HellaCopper Pt. II – The Comic Book Superhero Series

After Ernest and Francis Riceco watched Officer Johnson get the Chinese AVIC Z11WB into the air the pair hopped into the Captain’s cruiser to chase it. The aircraft went this way, that way, up and down, and several times it spun around before heading westward like a speeding bullet. With siren screaming, father at the wheel, son hanging out the passenger side window keeping eye on the plane and shouting out the ever-changing and unpredictable direction the copter chose, the two followed the flying machine. From the Teterboro Airport in Hasbr...

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I Quit!

Mr. Robert RetterSenior EditorNew York Daily Post314 West 30th Street35th FloorNew York, NY, 10028December 24, 2021Dear Bob,It is with deep regret and a tinge of sadness, that today I officially render my resignation as an employee at the New York Daily Post. The last eight years I’ve worked for both you and the newspaper have been nothing less than a thought-provoking experience for me. But, it is now clear that this is the right time for me to move on to pursue other interests in my life. I do hope you’ll understand.We both know that histo...

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Chris and her Daughters

Weekly Contest #120

Standing in front of me in a dress I’d never before seen her wear, Chris, my wife, asked, “Does this make me look fat?” Being an old hand at fielding such questions I responded, “No dear, you look more lovely than usual, whom one would think, in and of itself, was unsurpassable!” Letting out a peal of girlish laughter, the kind of laugh that had been one of the many things I found so attractive about her, my wife leaned in to kiss my cheek but faded away before she could. Hey, when she’s happy I’m happy! It had been a little over a year ...

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Want Is a Cruel, Cruel Mistress

Want. Roughly, she handcuffs me to the bed and then tortures me with temptation before forcing me to say it yet again, “I want this, and I want that, and I want most of all what I can’t have.” Her cat o’ nine tails whip and flails my exposed naked flesh as she laughs out loud with every lash, and each time she tells me repeatedly that I can’t have whatever it was I had wanted and had pleaded for. Wave after rough wave of disgust permeates my very soul as she pushes the often-sucked toe of a dirty, stiletto-heeled thigh-high boot between my l...

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You Wanna Do Something Fun?

Weekly Contest #114

Then, attack Britney Spears. Except for Chris Crocker, just about almost everyone else has at one time or another. Go ahead—have at it—she’s an easy target. For the past thirty-nine years that she’s walked around on this big ball of fun that we lovingly refer to as planet Earth, our planet somewhere in a galaxy far, far away, you know, just like in that renowned Star War opening crawl that begins those movies says, she’s spent just as much time in the spotlight of the public’s eye for her achievements as for her downfalls; achievements and d...

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Officer HellaCopper – The Comic Book Superhero Series

This is my worst nightmare, but at least it didn’t happen to me…When technology goes awry there could be dire consequences. The results may also yield unforeseen benefits for not only something or someone, but for the entire world. This is the story of Officer Peter Richard Johnson, a rank and file member of the Weehawken Police Department. A man who is no longer just a man—but one who is part man—and part machine. He’s a man who stands for truth, justice, and the American way. A very proud patriot who puts life, limb, and rotors on the line...

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Just Like Me

Weekly Contest #112

Sitting at my desk in the morning I studied the computer keyboard. Traces of dried blood were visible on several of the character keys; particularly the “Z” and the “C”. I had been hurt. My bandaged fingers still ached and throbbed from the accident. Of course I'm referring to my fistfight with the electric fan the night before. Yeah, I got banged up a bit, but hey, you should’ve seen the other guy! The fan, that bladed brute, was busted up beyond repair and now left for dead in the garbage dumpster that sat outside the building.Here’s what ...

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Su-10’s Interns

Weekly Contest #109

Damn, another one had quit on her yesterday! Su-10 (a funny and attractive brunette who worked in the financial industry and who was coincidentally the subject of an ongoing debate among the guys at The Court Street Bar and Restaurant about whether she was really part Asian or only an impression based solely on her use of eyeliner) had had it with interns! They were mostly over-privileged sons and daughters of the upper echelon’s clients at her corporation and in her strongly opinionated point of view were absolutely worthless. Less than wor...

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