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Squirrelly Writer

Author on Reedsy Prompts since Oct, 2019

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431 Followers
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91 Stories

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Weekly Contest #182

It started, unimaginatively enough, with someone looking up at the stars. That someone was Laurie Entwistle, who instead of writing up a review of up and coming ska punk ensemble The Mucus Plugs, looking for new ways of saying that they “absolutely tore the bloody roof off” of local pub Dog & Gristle (a venue which truthfully remained quite intact), was actually stuck on making tweaks to her dating profile. Female Early 30s Occupation: journalist Likes: travel, reading, her sofa, art, photography, blueberry muffins, endless scrolli...

12 likes 5 comments 5
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Lactose Intolerance

Weekly Contest #176

I wasn’t supposed to be in Daddy’s study that day. I definitely wasn’t supposed to be in the closet of Daddy’s study that day. And I certainly wasn’t supposed to find out the real reason that Daddy was a very rich man indeed. I was only in there because my Tesla (a mini remote-controlled version that has the same number plate as Mommy’s but I’m not telling you what it is because it’s embarrassing) took a wrong turn and nosed the door open. The big brown door with the peephole in it too far up for me to even try to look through, the door th...

15 likes 7 comments 7
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Feel the Benefit

Weekly Contest #170

Eye mask. Lavender spray. Ear plugs. Phone off. All the things I do to avoid you, yet sometimes, somehow, you still sneak in. Usually complaining of how tired you are, failing to note the irony. Then on about how you never get to go anywhere. I remind you that you do not have legs, but you talk over me to tell me how you do not approve of my boyfriend, my hair, my clothes, my weight, my carpet, my job. Which doesn’t matter. None of these things are for you. But I could build a concrete wall and your poison arrows would still corrode it ov...

18 likes 16 comments 16
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Fanfare

Weekly Contest #166

What first hit me was the cold. What I first hit was the printer. Daft to leave the tray poking out over the bin everyone was discarding their cupcake cases in. There were fans on every desk. As well as overhead fans. The flapping of neon post-it notes forming the disco lights of the party. All the windows were wide open, the sounds of gulls and sirens added to the mix of the whirring of the blades and the hens’ clucking going into overdrive as they welcomed me, the new chick. I would like to say it was all in celebration of my arrival bu...

13 likes 4 comments 4
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Weekly Contest #162

Hyper-seasonal special Fungi-To-Be-With Straight from head chef Marlene Bartley’s vegetable garden/acres of woodland (a land guaranteed protected from the radiation after effects, being as it is covered a magnificent dome of state-of-the-art disease-resistant toughened glass), we are delighted to present a creamy vitamin-enriched garlic mushroom risotto peppered with crispy crickets, who reach your plate after spending their best days in our patented Bug Hotels, with prior counselling as to the benefit they will be serving greater life for...

15 likes 7 comments 7
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Mandatory Training

Weekly Contest #160

Triggers for strong language and sexual harassment. Annabel inspected the two glasses carefully for any smudges, then filled them from the sink. Her eyes made contact with the pitcher sitting on the shelf, so she decided to fill that too, for good measure. England was experiencing a heatwave, after all, and despite all the airs and graces her employer KSM Partnership liked to put on, the budget didn’t quite stretch to air conditioning. Trying to balance the tray while opening the kitchen door, Annabel caught her ghostly reflection in th...

11 likes 4 comments 4
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The Museum of OCD

Weekly Contest #155

I heard Viv’s familiar rat-a-tat on the door and got the hoop of keys out of my pocket to let her in. The new guy, Otto, was also there, slouched against the doorframe as though it were the only thing holding him up. Not for the first time, I wondered if they arrived together because they’d left from the same place together. None of my business though. My business is making sure the Museum of OCD opens on time. Obviously there would be people complaining if it didn’t. Viv traipsed in with a breezy “Good morning, Bob,” while Otto almost im...

15 likes 8 comments 8
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Moving Day

Weekly Contest #150

My life goes around in circles. As the family folklore goes, I was found in a box on the doorstep. However, breaking with convention, it was Father who was the most excited to see me. The Twins lost interest after an hour, retiring to their bedroom to play their complicated ‘cat’s cradle’ game, which for longer than I’d care to admit I thought somehow was for the benefit of Kanye the Cat. Mother gazed blankly down at me and muttered something unintelligible, before returning to the task of taking the haphazardly-stacked items from the d...

14 likes 7 comments 7
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Why do I never get to be in your selfies?

Weekly Contest #144

I know most people who see and like this post won’t read the caption. I mean, who reads captions, right? But I need to get this off my chest, even if it only ends up being for me. What is it you think you see in my photo? A bubbly, self-assured blonde woman in her 20s who’s got it all under control? I mean, how could she *not* be in control with those immaculately brushed brows, true? Or a carefree girl with her head thrown back in laughter at what must’ve been a pant-wettingly good joke? A lovely lady who’s mind must be as free from cloud...

17 likes 5 comments 5
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The Basement at Percy's

Weekly Contest #141

Robert Sorola got comfortable in his chair while he read through the agenda one more time. His son, Reggie, he’d sent upstairs to the kitchen with the vaguest of shopping lists. Neither of them had what you could call a refined taste. Both their lives had been peppered with such hardships that whenever food came into sight – whatever food came into sight – it was a case of how much they could claw their way before they found it swept away by someone who figured they were just doing their job. Not these days. Robert Sorola had risen throug...

11 likes 4 comments 4
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A Perfect Swarm

Weekly Contest #133

ENVELOPE NO. 1“Hi, my name is Jared Blass. I am nine years old. My mother is called Belinda and my father’s name is Anton.”I popped the pencil in my mouth, reviewing what I had so far. Do we need such backstory? I tried remembering if Curt’s keepsakes had any sorta private information like that. Like, did he write an introduction anywhere, or did he, like my father would say (knowing it pees my mother – a veggie – off), “get right to the meat of the matter.” Things got wavy when I tried to think back.But then I didn’t want to think of the co...

8 likes 5 comments 5
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The Chore War

Weekly Contest #128

Tamara froze in the doorway of the kitchen. A boundary between realms. She knew she could retreat to the comfort and solitude of her still-warm cocoon of duvets, blankets, cushions and the 20-odd soft toys she liked to surround herself with, despite being 20-odd herself. Or she could tumble into an unknown future, proceed to the communal cutlery draw, pulling the handle with similar apprehension to plucking the sword from the stone, discovering at last whether indeed the last teaspoon in the house was the one whose muddied oval eye was mo...

13 likes 4 comments 4
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Stars on the Ground

Weekly Contest #122

The fires stretched way out. Dots of ‘em, then blending out into a horizon that was starting to shake with the screams while ghostly snakes of smoke found their way up to the sky. Or maybe it was just my eyes seeing a shimmer, scratched from my own cookout themselves. Who knew. Who even could say when the world was last stable. We’re just ants on a big rock tumbling through space after all. When I learned that the world was like a spinning top I asked my mother why we didn’t fall off. She covered up the gap in her knowledge by asking me to r...

11 likes 3 comments 3
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Who Just Phones People

Weekly Contest #115

I was unfastening my bra when my phone decided to crawl across my dresser, making alarming noises that I don’t recall it ever having made before. Someone was calling me. In 2021. It must be an emergency. Who died? I peered at the screen. Jeremy. Well, Jeremy, you’ve just lost yourself a bunch of points. I turned my music down and answered the call, managing to turn the tail end of my annoyed sigh into a breezier “Hiiii.” “Hello Lou. So you think it looks bad out there? Looks okay from my window.” I looked out of my one, which was...

21 likes 7 comments 7
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Miss May

Weekly Contest #111

I jerked my right elbow to remove his hand from my left breast. “Nope. Not tonight,” I told him, pulling my book closer to my nose. A shield to prevent further attacks. Adam rolled over onto his back with a huff, then gave me that wounded puppy look that, much like an evening on red wine, makes me want to laugh, then cry. Five years married and he wasn’t showing any signs of slowing down. I suppose I should count myself lucky. But then he hadn’t had to go through what I went through today. Unless they had started a ‘bring your kid to w...

16 likes 7 comments 7
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