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Weekly Contest #67
Everyday Lawn Care By John Raab Every morning I wake up before my alarm clock goes off because I have a lovely little rescued mutt named Harlow who incessantly whines just inches from my face, around 5:00 A.M. If I refuse to arise and walk her at that ungodly early hour, then I know a certain shitty aroma will soon waft my way. A wake-up turd. So, she has me well trained to take her out. I do not have her trained, she has me trained; some of my friends tell me it is still better than having a wife. Maybe someday I will find “The One.” Last...
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