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An Adventurous Baby Chicken’s, “Tale”Once upon a time on a farm in Danville, Va., there lived a little hen. All the other animals were constantly teasing her because she couldn’t lay any eggs. She tried so hard, but she just could not get a visit from the old girl, Mother Nature to furtelize her eggs. All the other birds on the farm were constantly making fun of her saying, “Fertility is not for you! Now, we don’t mean to sound so, ‘korney,’ but you should go find a nie, ‘Colonal’ to mate with! Your favorite baseball must be Tie, ‘Cobb!’ Onl...
This Happened To Charlie Brown On Kay-Day Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va. there lived a really nice guy named Chip. Actually, that was his nickname. People called him that because he was, "a chip off the old block" according to his parents, but unfortunately the, "block" was just what his head was shaped like. He resembled Charlie Brown so they called him, "Blockhead." He was always trying to do the right things, but somehow things always seamed to go wrong for him. When he wanted to be a place-kicker for The Danvi...
Natural Frog Is Supernatural Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va. there lived a 15 year-old girl named Wanda. Well, actually, that was her nickname. She got it because she was always saying things such as, "I, 'Wanda' go there," "I, 'Wanda' buy this," "I 'Wanda' go have a sleepover at Mary-Jane's house," and, "I, 'Wanda' how many times I have to ask Freddy to attend my party before he says, 'yeah, alright'' and other things such as that. Her family was a lower-middle class one so they couldn't afford all the things...
This Is How Cuz Stepped Into The Sunlight Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va., there lived a red-head named Cuz. Having survived a really tragic traumatic brain injury or t. b. i., he had to face many problems in life which no person in the history of the universe had ever had to put up with. On the other hand, a lot of talents had been discovered since that tragic day which changed a life from happy to totally frustrating and miserable. Yet having an occasional nice thing happen every now and then gave him a pur...
Submitted to Contest #308
Daydreams About Night Things All Afternoon Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va. there was a farm owned by Farmer Green. Actually, that was his nickname because it was the color of just about every crop he raised. On that farm there was everything you’d expect to see on one. There was a huge orchard, almost ¾ of an acre in diameter where he grew every kind of crop imaginable. Yet the most impressive thing about his farm was all the animals who lived on it. Each one had their own special thing they did which con...
Submitted to Contest #307
An American Werewolf In Danville Once upon a time in a far away land known as Danville, Va., there lived a 16 year-old boy named Laurence Talbot. He was a really great kid who had a 3.9 grade average since he was in junior highschool in all of his subjects. He was the first string quarterback on his team called The Mud Toads. Well, maybe that wasn’t much to be proud of since their mascot had much room for improvement. He’d been dating his lady-love, Trixcie since they were in junior high and the relationship was getting quite seriou...
A, "High"-school Principal Who Was Quite Low Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va., there lived a high school principle named Mr. Martin. He was the absolute strictest mnan in all of Danville, which is really saying a lot since the population of that huge city was so immense. Some of the kids had made up sayings such as, "Get sent to Mr. Martin, and problems will be startin' ." Any time a kid acted up in class, all the teacher would say is, "Either shape up or you'll be sent to You-Know-Who!" That would always st...
Mysterious Emails Can Change A Life Once upon a time in a huge metropolice called Danville, Va. there was a swamp. In that swamp lived a bullfrog named Hop, (that’s what he was so full of). He was a really nice frog, except he had a problem with getting dates with the girls. There was one in particular he really had a thing for. Her first name was Anne. Her last name was Fibian, but her i. d. said, "Anne-Fibian." Hopkins thought she was the most beautiful frog in the history of the universe, but her daddy didn't like Hop so they ...
Impeached President Frank Joppers Farewell Speech To begin with, let me say to all you good people, and my fellow Americans, that today my heart is extremely heavy as I speak with all of you totally awesome people here today. The act which I did was not good at all and should have never happened in the first place, but it did and now I must suffer the consequences from it, which are having to step down from being the most powerful man on this entire planet Earth. Please accept my most humble apologies for my wrong actions. I know now t...
March 25th, 1781, ….The war has been raging on for quite a long time, and I for one am ready to go home. I’m sick of all this shooting and running and cannon balls flying. Taking other human’s lives is most definitely not something that comes easy for me, but my commanding officer, General Wahington, has promised it will all be ending in the immediate future. Then again, he’s been rong several times during this war, his wrong decisions have cost a lot of innocent men’s lives, some of them were my comrades and friends. Several times I ha...
That Day When The Donkey Cong Come To Life Once upon a time in a huge metroppolice called Danville, Va. there lived a 10 year-old boy named D. C.. His parents called him that when he was born since they both had such high-hopes that he would some day end up living in The White House. Actually, he got that nickname because that was his favorite video game, and he played it so frequently he was really hard to beet. The other reason was from his parents because they told him if he didn't stop playing that silly game so much he'd turn into a don...
noke Tells The Biggest Lie Of Her Life Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va. there lived a 9 year-old girl named Pinoc. Actually, that was the nic-name people had given her because it was short for Pinochio. Not only did she have an unusually immense nose, but she also made up things all the time that were not true. Most people called those things she told lies or whoppers, but her friends called them, “con-’fib’-ulations.” She would lie about so many things that even the people she thought were her friends didn’...
Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va. there lived a really nice guy named David. He was the coolest guy in the whole city because he was a born-again, blood- bought, Spirit-filled, Holly-rolling, Christin believer, child of the King. In other words, he was a really super-spectacular kind of guy. Everybody who knew him said he was the absolute coolest creature that the Lord had ever put life into. Yet he only had one major problem and that was his grammar had much room for improvement, so because of that, he hired a t...
Lucy, The Devil-Girl Gets Her Reward Once upon a time many years ago there lived a really nice girl named Tina. The nicest thing about her was the huge amount of patience she had. Each time a problem of any kind would attempt to come her way, she never got angry. Her tolerance level was greater than any of the doctors in the wide medical field. Her favorite sport to participate in was baseball. The reason for that was because she was always so, “out-standing in her field” of medicine. In fact, that was one main reason she went to m...
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