Hometown Ghosts

She smiled like someone who had already read the ending, but she chose me anyway.

Claire was too good for me. I knew, she knew it, and even my mom said that she could do better. I don’t know what she saw in me that kept her around for so long. Whenever I’d ask, she offered that mysterious but gorgeous smile and shrugged.

I acted like it didn’t bother me. With my arm slung around her shoulder and a stupid, cocky grin on my face, I was the coolest guy on campus. I’d go out drinking with friends and come back to find her quiet and resigned. I always knew she would leave eventually, but I never knew when.

I don’t know if maybe she got tired of being treated like a prize, or if she finally

realized everyone in her life was right. But, one day, she left me a note that said, “I hope you figure out what it is you’re wanting.”

It took a while, but my world changed after that. She was the calm in the storm that was my life. Once she was gone, I couldn’t keep up the “cool guy” facade. I cut back on drinking and buckled down on my studies, like she always said I should do. “You’ll make a good doctor someday,” she said once.

Now, I was pulling into the driveway of my mom’s house after a few hours on the road. When I left home, the inky blue sky reminded me that I’d normally be asleep at that hour. Now, a thin layer of clouds dotted the sky and reminded me of Claire’s eyes.

I stepped out of the car and stretched my arms overhead. Why was I thinking about her so much? Was it because I saw a spot she claimed as “ours”, or that being in my hometown reminded me of how we met one night at a college football game? Before I had time to think much more about it, I heard the screen door creak open.

“Hey, Mom,” I said with a smile as she approached. She opened her arms for a bear hug, which I accepted despite being a foot taller than her now.

When she pulled back, I briefly glanced at her weathered face and graying hair. Still, she had a twinkle in her tired eyes. “Hi, hon.” She gave me a once-over and frowned. “You look exhausted.”

“I am.” I laughed wryly, hoping to disguise the thoughts swirling in my mind. “Waking up at 4 in the morning will do that to you.”

Mom squinted her eyes at me but remained quiet. Instead, she steered me inside, where the true reason for my visit waited.

“You’re here! It took you long enough.”

“Well, some of us don’t still live with their mom, Hannah Banana,” I retorted, pulling my little sister in for a hug, ignoring her soft punches on my upper arm. “Are you ready for your big day?”

“Are you kidding? I’ve been dreaming of this since I was five.” Hannah swept a lock of hair behind her ear—one of her tells. “And don’t call me that.”

“Why? It’s cute.”

“Matt,” she said sternly. Her tone reminded me of Mom. “I’m getting married in a week. Be serious.”

“Hey, Hannah Banana is seriously adorable.”

That earned me a solid smack on the shoulder. Totally worth it.

“Anyway, the real question is if you’re ready.”

“For what again?” I asked with a smirk. She glared but said nothing, and I sighed. “I’m ready to walk you down the aisle.”

I wasn’t, not really. It had been just the three of us for almost as long as I could remember. I wanted all of the happiness in the world for Hannah, but part of me wanted to take her fiancé aside and remind him what would happen if he hurt her.

“Oh, and one more thing—we’re having dinner for everyone tonight. Lindsey’s, 8 o’clock.”

Lindsey’s Diner wasn’t what anyone called fancy, but it was a taste of home that reminded me of everything good and bad in my life.

When I walked in, I was greeted with the same smell—too-old coffee, bacon, and something like nostalgia. I heaved in a big breath before finding my sister’s head of curled hair.

As I walked up, her fiancé—Lucas—sprang from his seat so abruptly it almost tipped over. He stuck his hand out eagerly, and I couldn’t help but chuckle. “How’re you, man?” I asked.

He murmured something about being great and encouraged me to take a seat. “How was the drive?”

“Not too bad—too early for traffic.” I raised a glass of water to my lips.

Hannah intervened before we could small-talk ourselves to death. “Everyone is here except—“

“Claire?” I whispered, nearly choking on my water.

Lucas stood and walked over to her. They had a quick hug before Claire turned to me. “My cousin is marrying your Hannah?”

She sent a look to Lucas that I can only imagine I reciprocated to Hannah. She shrugged nonchalantly, but she knew what I was doing. She and Claire always got along like the best of friends. But that was years ago, and I never pictured this situation.

Claire took her seat at the table, and I somehow managed to get through dinner without making a fool of myself. When it seemed socially appropriate, though, I bolted outside and gasped in the night air.

“I thought sure you’d be out here with a cigarette,” said a voice a few minutes later.

I laughed wryly. Part of me had been longing for a smoke, but . . . “I quit two years ago.”

Claire tentatively came over to the bench where I sat. “Really? I never thought you’d stop.”

“I don’t really drink anymore, either,” I offered, like some olive branch.

She sat beside me. “I’m impressed, Matt. That’s a lot of change. What’s next? Did you finish medical school?”

It felt strange to talk like this—like friends—as if it hadn’t been years.

“No, but I’m a decent clinical counselor now.” I paused and studied her ivory skin flecked with freckles. “How about you? Are you still a journalist?”

She nodded slowly. After a while, she said, “Seeing you really took me by surprise.”

“Me, too,” I admitted. Hesitantly, I added, “Not a bad one, though.”

The few seconds I held my breath waiting for her response felt like an eternity. “Not a bad one.”

That gave me the confidence I needed to ask one question. “Look, I know things between us—well, I was a dick. But I can see that now. And, I know we’ve got this wedding in a week, and I was wondering if maybe . . . I don’t know. Would you be willing to hang out sometime? Just-just to talk and—“

“Matt.” Claire put her hand over mine, and my brain short-circuited. “Are you asking for a second chance?”

I nodded slowly, and she smiled back. This time, her smile was unlike any before, and it made my heart skip a beat. She was reading a book, but this time, she didn’t know the ending.