A Hungry Ghost

I am hungry. 

I tremble, limping alone and aimlessly through a desert of dark sand. That’s all everything was. Dark and cold and empty. So empty, so cold, so—so—hungry. My suit, dirty and torn, clings to my skin with cold sweat, and my stomach twists with a burning desperation.

If there was anything before this place—this hunger, I do not know it. All I know now is to walk and starve. The sand will take me if I stop. I feel it cling to me as I move, cold tendrils begging me to dissolve into the dust. 

There are moments I want to. Moments the hunger becomes so heavy, so painful, my feet falter, and I imagine becoming nothing. 

But there is a hole in my belly. Gaping, it screams at me to keep moving, begging to be filled. So I walk. Through endless black sand under an endless black sky. I walk and walk and walk and ache. 

I’m hungry. But there's nothing; there’s always nothing. I am nothing. What was my name again? God, I’m so hungry. It was all I was. Nothing but a cold, coarse hunger. Coarse like sand—dark sand—I—sand—empty—hungry—sand—eat the sand—so empty—so hungry—hungry—

A beat. 

I gasp, coughing up globs of wet sand. I was neck-deep in the ground, the desert slowly swallowing me whole. I flail, pushing against the current sucking me in. Then I hear it: a soft rhythm. In the distance, I see a crack in the shadows, a sliver of light singing to me like an angel. 

I scream, clawing at the ground, ripping my body from its grasp. Gasping, crying, I crawl to the light, the sand around me doubling its efforts to drag me below. Hope gave me the strength to stand, the need to run, barreling headfirst out of the darkness. 

The empty black desert melts into a world of color and light. A small town lies at the bottom of rolling, flower-covered hills. The sky was blue, and the air was clean. My mouth waters. 

A young child in a purple summer dress picks flowers in the field. Two large black puffs sit atop her head, decorated with the flowers at her feet. She stands giggling, twirling with her basket of blossoms. 

The rhythm of her heart rings in my head as it beats in her chest. My body morphs; claws extend from my nails, my teeth sharpen into points. I charge towards her, but before I can touch, a blue flame appears, burning my hand. I hiss, snatching my hand away and falling onto my back. 

The girl squeaks as I land with a thud, “Oh goodness!” Her eyes were as blue as the sky above, shining against her dark brown skin. 

She walks over to me, worry creasing her brow. “Oh no, sir, are you ok?” She asks. I try to speak, but my throat is filled with dirt. 

“Are you lost?” I can only nod.  

She beams pearly white. “I’ll take you to Miss Mary then! She’s really smart and super nice. I’m sure she’ll help you!” She reaches out a hand, but a blue flame flickers in warning. I get up on my own, and follow as if pulled by an invisible string. 

She skips beside me down the dirt road. Her heartbeat in tune with the throbbing ache in my gut. I reach—so hungry. 

Then she pushes ahead suddenly, stopping in front of me. “Welcome to Sunnyside!” She squeals, gesturing to the sign beside her. I notice then the small buildings I saw at the top of the hill now standing tall in front of me. 

“It’s not every day we get visitors here! Everyone will be so excited!” She clapped before running into town. 

Sunnyside was a small colonial town; its buildings were painted in bright colors. Men, women, and children walked the streets, dark-skinned with clear blue eyes, all smiling and talking animatedly to each other as they went along their daily routines. The girl greeted everyone who passed. And they all responded with glee.  

Hundreds of heartbeats pounded in my skull. My stomach roared, but the blue flame flickered around them all. No one seemed to notice me, a pale, dirty man limping down the main road. 

The girl led me to the town square. There, in the center, was a small wooden stage, its base covered in flowers, and a man bound and gagged to a wooden post, struggling against the restraints with muffled screams. Yet no one but me seemed to notice. His heartbeat pounded wildly, high and quick; it sang above all the others like a melody. 

I wondered if fear made the heart taste as sweet as it sounds. My fangs ached for a bite.

A woman in a rainbow-marbled dress with a white corset was laying flowers on the stage floor. She was humming to herself, swaying her hips as she sprinkled flowers around the post. 

“Miss Mary! I got the flowers you asked for!” The girl yelled, running to the stage. Miss Mary stopped dancing and smiled. 

“Wonderful, Ellie! Would you mind helping me put them in my hair?” She said, puffing up her afro. Ellie squealed in excitement.

Mary moved to sit on the small steps to the stage; Ellie stood on the step behind her and began decorating her hair like her own. Mary’s eyes met mine, black like sand. I flinched back, a soul-chilling cold seeping into me.

She smiled. “And you brought a new friend.” 

“I met him on the road, like you said I would!” Ellie exclaimed.

“What’s your name?” Mary asked. My mouth opened, but instead of sound, black sand spilled from my lips. 

Mary hummed, “You poor thing. You must be exhausted being lost for so long. I bet you're just starving.” 

My body moved before my mind, hissing, fangs extended; I lunged forward. A deep navy blue flame singed my body, and I reared back with a demonic roar. The man tied to the post wailed against his gag, his heartbeat reaching a fevered pitch. Mary smiles. 

Standing, she thanked Ellie for her work before shooing her away. As soon as the girl ran off, Mary’s smile sharpened; her dark eyes burning like hot coals. 

“You know. Us living folk have a nasty habit of becoming spoiled.” Mary said, looking up at the stage. 

She turns back to me, her smile now a sneer. “We feel as if we are entitled to our lives. And we forget that living is a gift. My gift.” She growls through her teeth.

She stalks towards me, and I stumble backwards with every step she takes. “But I think you’d understand. You know the cold and dark.”

She stops only a foot from me, holding out her palms. “You know how in an instant it can all turn to dust.” Black sand pours from her hands, and I screech, turning to run. 

She grabs my arm, and I collapse to my knees and burn. I burn, and burn, and burn. 

My vision swims as she looks down at me. “I need someone who will appreciate all I do for them. I bet you’d be grateful, wouldn’t you? You’d never betray me, and always be by my side?” Her voice is muffled through the fire that consumes me. I cry out, nodding desperately for the agony to end. 

She lets go, and I gasp, gripping my arm, still feeling consumed by her scorching touch. She smiles, wiping her hands on her dress. But before she can speak again, the man on the post, somehow freeing himself from his gag, begins to scream.

“Help me! Help me! She’s a demon! A monster! Wake up! Please help me!” But the people of Sunnyside carry on, smiles unwavering. 

Mary glances around and laughs, clutching her stomach. Giggling, she crouches down in front of me, and I cower back. But she doesn’t touch me; instead, she pushes her face only inches away from mine, a wide grin splitting her cheeks. Black eyes becoming icy blue. 

“Are you hungry?” She asks. 

The question swallows all the pain from her fire. My hunger returns. A savage feral beast biting, foaming at the mouth. I am hungry. I am ravenous. I could eat the world whole, and it still wouldn’t be enough. 

I open my mouth and the pit at my core bellows—bottomless. Mary looks satisfied and moves to stand beside me. 

I watch the flame around the begging man flicker, then fade into nothing. 

Two words. “Then eat.”

And I do—at last.