Battle to End All Battles

Note: Story is nearly a repeat of one from May 2024, #249. Anyone on this site then may chose to skip.

Battle of the Sexes

So does this mean it has finally been settled? Once and for all? Considering the debate has been raging since... well, since the beginning of time really! Who believes Adam fully forgave Eve for offering that piece of fruit? Even if they managed to populate the world nearly single-handed afterwards don't you think he harbored a little resentment for making him work so hard to feed all those hungry mouths? Must have been some bad blood brewing below the surface. Something somehow needling him knowing she'd fallen for that sly, sleek serpent talk thereby banning them from the perfect garden where they had it made in the shade?

And they were only the first in a long line of couples putting on moves, vying for the upper hand, battling for bragging rights and who knows what else:

Jezebel's nemeses was Israel's prophet, Elijah, whom she wanted to kill after he showed up all the prophets of her false Baal gods. His Almighty God produced fire to consume the water-logged offering. Her gods failed. Yet the beautiful queen was the one finally going to the dogs, so to speak.

Samson and Delilah lived an unfortunate classic story of betrayal. A haircut cut deep.

Henry VIII held his six wives' fates in his hand - divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived. Talk about hard to live with!

There've been cases beginning with the death of a rival as in David and Bethsheba, or ending in the death of one partner like OJ and Nicole.

Or consider fictional shaky love stories like Scarlet and Rhett or more modern day Ross and Rachel.

Even 'I Love Lucy', the classic television series, ended in divorce for the stars, Desi and Lucy.

So the battle of the sexes has raged on.

But it was supposedly settled in 1973, right? That is what this match-up was billed as. The event was hyped all summer and concluded on September 20th in front of 30,472 in-house attendees and an estimated 90 million television viewers. It has to be true with that many witnesses!

A somewhat braggart, over-the-hill, past his prime, self-professed male chauvinist pig challenged a younger, in her prime, top of her game woman libber to play him for a $100,000 purse. Winner take all.

Oh, he strutted about with a cocky attitude. Maybe had the right since he'd already challenged and beaten another top contender only a few months before. For the first one he trained extensively and won easily. Interestingly dubbed the 'Mother's Day Massacre', he became over confident so lived the good life all summer sure he could repeat the feat.

But he may have underestimated his opponent's resolve. She spent the summer racking up even more wins for herself making her name well known in the circuit as the one to beat.

The match commenced with a burst of showmanship. Wearing a jacket emblazoned with 'Sugar Daddy' he stormed the humongous spaceship shaped arena in a rickshaw surrounded by a bevy of beauties. Likewise, she graced a glittery golden litter borne by bare-chested muscled he-men. The gauntlet thrown. Let the games begin.

He toyed with her. Didn't even bother to remove his warm-up jacket the first several plays. He should have been more serious. There was no love between these two. No matter how backhanded he tried to be she was on top of her ball. Served him right.

Her approach spun him one way then the other. She painted the baseline then came right back at him with a passing shot. He would slice away at a half volley and only manage to drop a shot. She could serve up an ace any time and smash his volley to pieces. His ground stroke went broke so sent an easy lob into her court where she could take it inside in or inside out. Add a little topspin and she won the advantage. She held one point away from game.

There were some junk balls and some jamming on both sides. An occasional let or fault which only proved they were human. After all, he was old enough to join AARP and she was still making a name for herself. There may be room for friendship when the deal is done but for now there were still a few deuces to go. This was no walk in the park, no picnic on the lawn. This was real.

A nasty rumor was brewing saying he intended to throw in the towel all along to clear up some bad gambling debts. Supposedly some meeting with Mafia types took place a few weeks before. Rumors waft around sometimes with no substance to them but he did like to play in Vegas a bit in the years following this spectacle.

Oh, sorry, back to the action. The rally looped on with top spins and back spins, backhands and forehands. Shots to the alley and baseline. Kick serves, cannonballs and deep shots. The upset was set up. Breaking point after breaking point. She pulled ahead.

She could taste the victory. Envisioning her establishment as a progressive force within her chosen sport she remembered her creation of WTA over the past summer and the success of getting equal pay with the male athletes in major professional events. Undeniably, she was a force to be reckoned with on or off the playing venue.

Twenty-nine-year-old, five time Wimbledon winner, Billy Jean King, won the much touted tennis match 6-4, 6-3, 6-3 and- following a celebratory victorious toss of King's racket- a sweaty, tired, defeated, fifty-five-year-old, Bobby Riggs, former men's champion of the sport, hopped the net and supposedly whispered “I underestimated you” into her ear.

King went on building her legendary tennis career with numerous Grand Slam championships and became an active activist in the blossoming women's rights movement. Riggs retired to Las Vegas as a tennis pro making wagers on whatever wandered his way. A later investigation questioned circumstantial evidence the show was rigged but tennis experts remain split as to whether or not the 'Battle to end all Battles' was thrown by Riggs or if he was simply bested by a better and younger player. Therefore, perhaps the most watched ever tennis match held in the Houston Astrodome more than fifty years ago ultimately did not settle the age old question.

Alas, the battle of the sexes still rages on. But what an enticing game it is!

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