Weightless

Chloe was not sure she could run anymore. Instead, she stood, her head beginning to spin, one hand clutched to her chest as she fought to steady herself. Her heartbeat mirrored the rain dripping from her fringe. The tension of everything that had happened weighed heavily on her. Chloe closed her eyes, hoping she would open them again and find she had awakened from a dream. Pain surged through her body, a pain so intense she felt as though she could crumble at any moment.

She leaned against the cold brick wall. Streetlights flickered, illuminating the puddles forming around her ankles. Her whole body felt as though it were swimming. Nothing made sense anymore.

How could it come to this? She gasped for air as the taste of sweat mixed with rain ran into her mouth. Footsteps approached from behind.

"Chloe."

A voice called her name. Chloe had run as fast as she could to get away from him. How could he have followed her?

"Leave me alone."

"Why did you run?"

"Don't come near me."

Chloe had fallen for James the moment they met, yet here she was, standing in the rain, trying to run away from him because of what he had done.

"Chloe, please don't—"

"I heard you on the phone. I heard you, James." Her words caught in her throat. "You said... you said... you can't do this anymore... You... you said... you'd packed a bag..."

"Chloe, listen, please."

"You're leaving, James. Just admit it."

A sharp pain shot through her chest. James stepped closer. Chloe flinched. She searched through her bag for something—anything—she could throw at him if he came any nearer. She wasn't about to be the fool who let a man like him get close again.

"Chloe, please. I didn't mean for it to go like this."

Of course he didn't. Chloe looked at him. Her eyes fell to the ring on his finger. It had only been there for six months.

James caught her looking and instinctively touched the ring, as though reassuring himself it was still there. Chloe looked down at her own ring. She felt like ripping it from her finger and flinging it at him. She had believed James was a man of his word. When he promised until death do us part, in sickness and in health, she believed he meant every word. It seemed that, once those vows were put to the test, they meant nothing after all.

Chloe turned on her heel and walked away. The headlights of passing cars blurred around her. Her head continued to spin. The sound of a siren rushing past sent waves crashing through her body. It felt as though she were losing her mind. She raised a hand to shield her eyes.

The run had drained every last bit of strength she had. Not even the oxygen tube seemed to be helping. She stumbled. James moved quickly, shrugging off his jacket and draping it over her shoulders to shield her from the rain. Chloe shrugged it off. She wasn't about to fall for his charm.

"Don't touch me again." She struggled to breathe with every word. Fire filled her head. A drumbeat pounded against her temples. Her hands were becoming numb. What was going on? She could no longer make out the shapes around her.

Their eyes met, catching her off guard. Those eyes she had come to love too much. Chloe looked away before she lingered too long. "Why come after me? To torture me?" Her voice cracked. "You never cared about me. As soon as the doctor sat us down that first time, I... I could see it in your eyes. The questions. The escape plan." She paused to catch her breath. "I'm... I'm just amazed it took you this long to figure it out." Another breath. "I'm the fool for believing."

James tried to interrupt, but Chloe wouldn't let him. The damage was done. In her eyes, he was nothing more than a child who didn't have the courage to face the hard things. "Leave it, James. You're off the hook."

Chloe turned away, and her legs gave out beneath her. Tears ran down her face, blending with the rain. Out of the corner of her eye she saw James. He stood perfectly still. Drenched. Unmoving. She was certain he was about to walk away. All she could make out now was his shadow. Too weak to move, Chloe remained where she had fallen. Her head whooshed as she watched the shadow move away from her. She was sure she was about to pass out. She wasn't sure she would ever wake again.

"Chloe, stop. I've had enough. I can't watch you like this." His voice was suddenly beside her ear. The shadow was no longer in the distance. It surrounded her. His body brushed against hers, and warmth spread through her. Chloe watched him through heavy eyes that refused to stay open. She couldn't speak. Every one of her senses seemed to be failing.

"Come. Get up." This time his voice carried the weight of command. Chloe rose with him almost involuntarily, as though guided by muscle memory. Her body remembered how she had fallen in love with him. It remembered the comfort he gave her. The strength he had always been. She leaned into him. James wrapped an arm around her. Rainwater had soaked through her cardigan, sending chills into her bones. Her body had slipped into survival mode, leaving her completely vulnerable to whatever James chose to do. In that moment, the man she had been running from became the one who was saving her.

As they stepped forward, Chloe felt James take her weight. Then he did something she never expected. Sliding one arm beneath her knees and the other around her back, he lifted her gently from the ground. She felt weightless. How could someone do the most unimaginably awful thing to her, yet hold her with such tenderness as though nothing had happened? As bitter thoughts swirled through her mind, Chloe closed her eyes. And passed out in James's arms.

Chloe had no idea how long she had been asleep, but when she woke, she was lying in a warm bed, covered in white linen, with rails on either side of her. Another hospital bed. She heard the faint beep of the blood pressure monitor wrapped around her arm. As she opened her eyes, she had no recollection of how she had got there. The events that had led to this moment made no sense. Looking around, she saw James asleep in the chair beside her. His clothes were disheveled. She had the strange feeling they were the same clothes he had been wearing before she came back into this place.

She tried to remember. Then James's phone caught her attention. Fragments of memory crept back. The phone call. The words. The feelings came flooding back. He had said he was leaving. That he couldn't do this anymore. Why was he still here? He must have felt guilty. The monitor began to beep more rapidly as her heart pounded.

James's eyes flickered open. He pressed the call bell before leaning against the bedrail and cautiously placing a hand on Chloe's shoulder. The nurse hurried in. Seeing Chloe's distress, she injected something into the line running into her arm.

Almost immediately, Chloe felt her eyes begin to drift closed again. She fought to stay awake. Just long enough to hear the nurse speaking quietly to James.

"Mr Kering, as the cancer progresses, Chloe may experience more episodes of confusion... and delirium." James let out a slow, shaky breath. "You have to understand," the nurse continued, "she isn't aware of what's happening during these episodes. As we continue treating the cancer, we're hoping for the best possible outcome." Chloe heard James leave the room.

Gone.

Too much to bear.

Exactly as she had expected.

But then she heard something else.

He was crying.

She forced her eyes open just enough to make out the nurse gently placing a hand on James's arm. A moment later, she heard him return. She closed her eyes again.

James didn't realize she could still hear him. He pulled the chair close to the bed, gently took her hand, and lifted it to his lips.

For a long time he simply sat there, holding it. Then he whispered,

"Chloe... I'm not leaving you."

James's phone rang.

The next thing Chloe heard was his voice.

"She woke... but..." He struggled to continue. "She was agitated. I've never seen her like that before."

A pause.

"The nurse wouldn't say anything."

Another pause.

"I know... but I don't have anything else to tell you."

His voice broke.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what happened."

Silence.

"Yes... she was fine on Monday morning, and then..." His voice faded. "She started throwing things at me, Sarah."

Sarah.

Chloe lay perfectly still as she heard James say her mother's name.

"I'm sorry, Sarah. I don't have answers." He swallowed hard. "But... the nurse said... this could happen again."

Every time Chloe woke, she found herself slipping back into sleep, as though her body refused to let her stay awake. The whole afternoon passed before she opened her eyes again. This time she felt stronger. Whatever the nurse had been running through her veins seemed to be working.

Chloe looked over to where James had been sitting. The chair was empty. A flicker of panic stirred inside her. Just as her heart began to race, James hurried into the room.

"Chloe."

He had been crying. His eyes were red. He leaned over and gently lifted her hand. As he did, their rings touched. The nurse's words echoed through her mind.

"This could happen again."

She had no way of understanding everything that had happened that day. But as rain tapped softly against the hospital window, and she felt the roughness of James's hand wrapped around hers...

She knew.

In sickness and in health.