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Catherine pauses. Listens. Starts reading again then freezes. Something is in her closet. Catherine has never liked her closet. There’s a door leading to the attic from within the closet. It has always spooked her.

What if someone has been in the attic all day waiting for me to return home?

Catherine pauses again. She doesn’t hear anything.

Must be my imagination.

Wait. There it is again. Someone, or something, is definitely in her closet.

Catherine slips a bookmark into her current read, gently pulls back the quilt, and tiptoes to the closet door. Taking a deep breath, she flings it open.

“Cat, you scared me to death! You shouldn’t go opening doors on people like that! It’s rude.”

Catherine stares in shock at the lady in her closet. Strangely enough, she felt no sense of danger with this intruder in her home.

“Wh-Wh-Who…Who are you? How do know my name?”

Dressed head to toe in every known shade of green, she replied “I’m Merryweather. You can call me Merry. I was sent here to help you. I know life hasn’t been easy. Sometimes a little guidance is all that’s needed! Lucky for you, here I am! As soon as I’ve done my job, Cate, I’ll be on my way!”

Her olive blouse matched the argyle on her socks above her cloverleaf flats. Her frazzled copper hair was loosely pinned. Her age was indiscernible, she could have been forty or seventy. She wore two jade earrings with a matching necklace and ring. Her forest green dress matched her headband.

“On your way to where?”

“Don’t worry, Cat. That’s not important!”

“I prefer Catherine.”

“What?”

“I prefer Catherine.”

“That’s not what I was told,” Merry mused as she produced a sheet of gold foil paper. After shuffling through several papers, she closely studies on. “You definitely go by Cat and occasionally Cate.”

“I don’t.”

Exasperated, Mary continued “You are Catherine Hamilton. A nurse at Billingsley Young Hospital in…”

“No. I’m Dr. Catherine Hamilton. You’re thinking of Nurse Hamilton. She’s great, but I’m not her.”

Merry’s face went whiter than a sheet hanging on the line to draw in the Georgia sunshine.

“What? No! No! No! This cannot be!”

“I’m sure it’s fine.” Catherine attempted to be comforting. Taking her by the shoulders, she led her back to the closer.

I must be having a mental break. Or dreaming, maybe I’m dreaming.

“Just go right in there, the way you came. It’s been nice meeting you!” Nothing could be further from the truth. “Either you’re real or this is the most vivid dream of my life,” Catherine mumbled. Forcing a smile, she bid adieu,“Take care now!”

“No. I can’t.”

“Why?”

“I’m technically still in training. If I go back without completing an assignment, I might not pass! I’ve worked so hard! I only need one more assignment! I can’t believe this! I’m always messing up!,” Merry lamented as her eyes filled with tears.

“What is the assignment?”

“Will you help? We could do it!”

“What’s the assignment?”

The assignment is difficult for Merry to explain. She cannot say where she is from, who sent her, or the point of the assignment.

“I can show you…,” Merry struggled to find the right word, finally settling on, “Possibilities.”

Catherine felt the walls closing around her. This is strange. Did she take something before she got in her bed to read? Is she having an hallucination? Does she have a brain tumor?

I might as well go along for the ride. She seems harmless enough. I’m sure this is a dream.

After Catherine agreed to help Merry, and Merry calmed herself, they walked into Catherine’s closet. Merry stood in front of the door to the attic.

“The door will open three times. Each time will show a possibility. Another avenue.” Merry paused. “I just can’t remember if we leave the door open or not.”

“Haven’t you done this before?”

“Yes, of course! Of course. Just not in this exact setting. There’s always doors but it’s been a minute since I’ve guided someone. And I can’t call up my guide or they’ll know that I’ve messed up.”

Catherine stood in her closet.

This is a strange world. The last time I was in my closet, I was picking my shoes. Now I’m picking my destiny.

“Let’s just go. I’ll leave the door cracked, you know, just in case! But no worries! We’ll be fine.”

Very reassuring.

Merry opened the door to the attic. Catherine expected to see nothing but her Christmas decorations. Instead a soft glow was shining through and an ethereal presence filled the closet.

“It’s time.”

Merry walked through the door first. Catherine hesitated. But there was no time for hesitation. Time doesn’t stop in any realm.

Slowly, Catherine walked through the door. She breathed a deep sigh of relief. This was her home. She recognized everything. Even herself, standing at her kitchen sink, finishing the dishes from a meal she had no memory of making or eating. It was a bit disorienting to be outside of herself, observing.

To the right, her boyfriend, John, sat at a mahogany desk. Two leather chairs framed a bay window and twilight was descending.

Catherine wore a wedding ring.

“Oh! That’s right! In this possibility, you’re married!”

“To John?

“Who else!? Look around, this is your beautiful home! What a place! I wonder what you paid for it? Oh, I guess you wouldn’t remember!” Merry was the type to laugh at her own jokes as she was now doing.

Catherine observed herself walk up to John, give a kiss on the forehead, and walk upstairs.

How romantic…not.

She watched as she enjoyed a luxurious bath with plush bath towels and settled into her soft bed.

Catherine and John weren’t happy. They also weren’t unhappy. They live in the muted disconnect of contentment. The house was lovely, but it was void of any joy or laughter. What it lacked in emotion, it easily made up for in elegance and serenity.

A flashback went to a Christmas gathering. It was with John’s family. His mother was hosting Christmas Eve dinner. It was stunningly beautiful. Her entire dining room was a winter wonderland, even down to her Spode dishes. She had invited Catherine’s family so they could all celebrate the holiday together. Laughing, drinking, and singing went on well into the night. Catherine and her sister cuddled together drinking hot cocoa and looking through old photo albums. The whole scene felt like a warm blanket after coming in from the cold.

“Let’s go!” Merry’s voice echoed as they suddenly appeared back in the closet.

“Ok, good, we made it back.” Merry sounded suspiciously relieved.

“Was there any doubt?” inquired Catherine.

Merry didn’t give a response, but gave a bit more information.

“Once you see your possibilities, then you can choose.”

“Choose what?”

“You can decide if you want to open the door to return to the possibility or stay in your current life.”

Without warning, Merry opened the door to the attic. This time, the atmosphere was not inviting. Instead, it was hostile. Hot, dry air blew through the door.

“Where is this?” Fear vibrated through Catherine’s voice.

“Don’t be a scaredy cat, Cat!” Merry cracked herself up again.

Merry took a step through the door and held out her hand.

Catherine took her hand and walked through.

“Where are we?”

Nothing seemed familiar. They were in a village in a desert, that was certain. But what desert and what village were a mystery. Everything was stifling, from the sand to the sun. Small huts dotted the barren landscape. A group of villagers were surrounding a large, white tent that seemed completely out of place. Catherine noticed a line forming and slowly the line went through one side of the tent and out of the other. Catherine and Merry moved closer.

There she was. Catherine saw herself with…who was that? She didn’t recognize him at first. A wave of emotions flooded her. That was Sam. Her first, and possibly only, true love. They were working hand in hand, administering vaccines to the villagers of this desolate desert in Chad.

It wasn’t that they had a torrid love affair. It wasn’t like that at all. It was a calm, steady love that had persisted solidly for four years. Until college was over and then they had simply gone their separate ways to medical school. It was as if they both knew that their time together wasn’t meant to last forever.

Smiling and kindness towards the locals helped Catherine and Sam form an instant bond in this alternate universe. The villagers trusted them. Vaccines were administered to children and adults alike. Catherine watched in awe as she and Sam vaccinated nearly fifty people in one day.

Catherine had a plan from her life by the time she was fifteen. That plan had never really varied. Sure, it had the occasional detour through a scenic route, but she always found her way back to the highway. This was beyond anything she had imagined. What an amazing life, using her medical skills to truly change a person’s life.

“This is selfless work,” Merry observed.

Catherine watched as she and Sam worked together flawlessly. She couldn’t help but notice what a drastically different life this was compared to her own. It was burning up, she was sweating, and thirsty. And yet…she was happy.

Merry looked at Catherine observing the situation. “You look happy.”

“I am.”

“You’re selfish.”

“What!?”

“Look around. You and Sam are completely isolated. Where’s your family?”

Catherine did what she was told. She looked around and realized that her emotions were that of the desert. Beautiful, romantic, and isolated. She seemed to sense the loneliness that existed here.

What’s the point of happiness if you’re alone? She felt a sense of abandonment that her family probably felt. This wasn’t living in another city in America. This was thousands of miles from home and probably visiting family one time a year or less.

Nostalgia overwhelmed her for the previous scenario. Maybe it wasn’t a romance novel. Maybe that life wasn’t filled with purpose and honor, but she was around those she loved.

“Enough of this!” Merry chirped.

Before Catherine could blink, she returned to her closet. Back again.

“Well?”

“Well what?”

“Which did you prefer?”

“I don’t know. Neither? I’m confused.”

“Okay, so there’s one more possibility.” Merry pulled out a large book that somehow fit into her tiny emerald purse. “Oh yes. This one! This one is my favorite!”

Before Catherine could say anything, Merry flung open the door to the attic. It was about as opposite as you could get from the previous scene. This time, the air was cool, the autumn leaves were vibrant and the sky was various shades of grey.

Walking through the door, Catherine realized that she was in her hometown. Merry and Catherine strolled to her parent’s house. Between the smell of fresh rain and the soft smoke of the chimneys, Catherine felt slightly intoxicated. Here they were: in front of Catherine’s childhood home. Her parents still lived here, very little had changed. It was Thanksgiving, one of Catherine’s favorite holidays. As they entered the house, Catherine looked around. Where was she? Not her but this version of her.

Catherine didn’t see her. She turned to Merry.

“Where am I?”

“Oh! Oh dear me. I should have warned you, my love. You’re dead!”

Silence enveloped Catherine.

“I’m…dead?”

“In this possibility, yes. You are simply the observer that you are right now. Don’t ask how you died, I have no idea. I just know that you’re dead.”

Catherine watched her family interact. Her parents looked older. Not older from age, but older from life. Her sister protectively held her son on her lap while her husband softly touched her shoulder.

What startled Catherine the most was that they existed. Perhaps this is the hardest lesson of all to learn: Life goes on. With or without you, life goes on. Merry and Catherine walked around the house. It was shocking how little had changed. People tend to believe they are more important than they really are, but that’s not to say their presence isn’t lost. To the contrary: Catherine’s family deeply missed her.

Catherine watched her sister and husband tenderly watch her parents as they watched her they adored their grandson.

That was enough.

“I’m ready to go back.”

“You don’t decide that.”

“Take me back.”

“It’s not time.”

Catherine sighed and walked out to the back yard. The tree house from her childhood was still in the tree and the swing gently swung as the soft wind rustled through the oak tree. This large oak tree had outlived many people. It shouldn’t surprise Catherine that it had outlived her and yet she couldn’t help but feel surprised.

She didn’t like this. She didn’t like this at all.

Merry came up behind Catherine and took her hand. “Let’s go.”

Once home, Catherine stepped out of her closet. Merry followed her.

“Alright, it’s time for me to go. I really loved meeting you and I hope that I helped you in some way.” Merry turned to the attic door, presumably to leave.

“Wait! What do I do?! You haven’t told me how this works! All you’ve done is whisk me off from one place to the next. What if I don’t like any of the options?”

“Then choose your current life. All you have to do is walk out of your closet, back into your home. But, if you decide otherwise, just close your eyes. Decide your destiny. Walk through the attic door. Either way, just be sure to close the door behind you!”

Before Catherine could say another word, Merry was gone.

Catherine decided.

She took a deep breath and walked through the opening, making sure to close the door behind her.