THE DISASTER

Their relationship began wonderfully. She thought he was cute and wanted me to meet him. He was her type. Quiet, not aggressive, but sports-minded. She had no idea that the boy she wanted to marry one day lacked ambition and was a mamma’s boy who liked to drink far too much for her liking. 

She liked to drink, too, but not as much as he did. But she was four years younger and still figuring things out in life, while he should have already figured those things out by now. 

His selfishness irritated her because he always bought beer and had money to go wherever he wanted with his friends and never spent any money going anywhere alone with his girlfriend, which really got on her nerves. Finally, when she moved out of her parents’ place and into a place in London, it still wasn’t enough, and he never stayed over at her place. She thought that after close to four years together, she would know by now if he loved her and wanted to be hers forever. 

They never spoke of a future where they were married. At least he never did. She kept asking about their future and even what he wanted for his future, since he had worked at the local hardware store long after earning a business degree. Only after her encouragement did he send his resumes out and make a name for himself in the business community. 

When he got the breakthrough he was looking for, she asked him about his drinking. He got a full-time gig with Chrysler Canada. He laughed at her and said, “No.”

She knew differently because she grew up with an alcoholic father, and she knew the signs. She attended meetings on the university campus for Al-Anon for support for someone who, when asked, denies they have a problem, and even after you point out why you asked about their problem, they continue to deny danger signs for the future.

She gave him a fighting chance: “Do you realize you drink at your fire meetings on Wednesday nights, your Sunday night hockey, your Saturday night hockey game, your Friday night hotel night, and sometimes on Monday nights you go to the hotel alone after you have been at my house and drink? Or if it is the summer, you drink after your baseball practices or games in the dressing room and leave me sitting in the car?” And you don’t believe that drinking 5/7 nights isn’t excessive or too much? Or that it presents a problem?” 

“No, not really.” 

“Well, I disagree. And I think you know why.”

“Probably, but it’s not out of control like your dad’s drinking.” 

And do you think my mother married him when his drinking was out of control like it is today? 

“No, I don’t.” 

“So, then you understand. Right?” 

“No. I don’t.”

“Are you kidding?” 

“No.”

“Okay, listen. My father was like you. He drank, but it was kept under control at the same age you are now, when my mother dated him. Now look at them. His drinking is a problem. Do you think I want that in my later years of marriage? Give your head a shake. I want to travel and play sports. Around the world.” 

“I want that, too.”

“Oh, are you sure you want to travel?” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Well, when I asked you to go to Costa Rica with me and my cousin, Alan, you refused with no explanation and without even thinking about it. Why?”

“Because I would rather not visit countries where I don’t speak the language.” 

“What?” 

“Well, I don’t.” 

“Okay, so that means half the world is out of the question, then.” 

“Basically, I guess.” 

“That’s not cool with me.” 

“Sorry.”

“I see.”

“Well, maybe you’ll change your mind.” 

“Yeah, and maybe you will.” 

“Doubt it.” 

“Me too.”

“Good night.”

“Yeah, good night.” He leaned in to kiss her, but she pulled away.  

After that discussion, they took time apart for a while. She knew a guy from work. He asked her to go for a drink. She accepted. After that, she told her long-time boyfriend that she thought they should take a break. She found someone else who treated her better and actually wanted to be around her. And who treated her like the gift she is? He didn’t have an answer. He was lost without her and devastated that she left him. He never dreamt she would leave him. He knew she loved him.

He couldn’t get her back because he never tried. He let her go and never wanted her back. He knew he couldn’t hold her and had no idea why. But the conversation they had the last time they were alone was all that came back to him at night as he slept.

He told a different story during his waking hours because he needed to hate her to get past his hurt and heartache. He painted a picture of her as the awful person who cheated on him and broke up with him to leave him for someone else. She didn’t answer his allegations. She didn’t speak about his issues in public. She never answered what he made up about her. She remained silent. Many people he told who loved her turned that love into hatred. How quickly love turned to hatred amazed her. She left their small town and never returned for years. When she did, she came home with two babies and no husband. She was better for it. And lived with her parents. 

She was a successful high school teacher, and she worked full time. Self-sufficient and totally independent. Everyone in town knew she had returned. Her parents helped her out and helped her to go out in town on evenings whenever she could. When she did, she inevitably ran into her ex, who was alone. They had a child the same age, and his wife had to stay home to care for him. 

“Hey, how are you? It’s been a while. I understand you’re married and have a child. Congratulations. I guess your wife drinks more than you do. I’m not surprised.” 

“Pff, what’s that supposed to mean? Yeah, we have a child the same age as your youngest, I guess. So, are you putting your kid into any town sports? 

“Of course I am. Soccer, baseball, and swimming at the Sherk. What about you two?” 

“Hockey, baseball, and soccer, no swimming.” 

“I would put mine in hockey, but I can’t tie the skates, and I don’t know the first thing about putting on the equipment. And I’m not going to ask the other fathers for help. I’ll look lame.” 

“Yeah, you probably would. But if I were there. I would help out, and I’m sure most guys would.” 

“You think so? I am so embarrassed about going and not knowing what I’m doing.” 

“Don’t worry about that. There are plenty of guys who go who would love to help you.” 

“Why do you think that?”

“Because you don’t know how many guys think you are beautiful.” 

“What?” 

“I’m serious.”

“Okay, that’s enough. Thanks, but I gotta go and see what’s shaking at the hotel. Are you going there?” 

“Yeah, I think I will.”

“Did you walk or drive?”

“I walked.”

“Do you want a ride?”

“Sure.”

“Okay, take your time. I’ll wait for you.”

“What happens when we get there?

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t you think tongues will wag?”

“So, let them.”

“And you’ll need a ride home.” 

“I’m sure your wife will be gawking out the window and see who drops you off.” 

“I don’t care about that. Do you?”

“No. But I don’t live with her.” 

“Yeah, I do. And most days I wish I didn’t. Especially if I knew you were coming home.” 

“What?”

“I would never have married her if I knew you were coming home to live here again for good.” 

“You shouldn’t talk like this.” 

“Why not? Do you feel the same way about me still?”

“I don’t know what I feel.” 

“You don’t?”

“It depends. How many beers have you had?”

“This is my second.”

“I have a better idea than going to the Hilton. Do you want to go somewhere private and talk more?” 

“Yeah, sure.”

“Do you have a place?”

“Maybe. Let me make a phone call.” 

He used the bar phone and talked for three minutes. He hung up, turned to her, and said, 

“I’ve got a place. Let’s go.”

“Where?” 

“My parents’ place.” 

“What? Did you tell them who you’re coming home with tonight?”

“Yeah, they ‘re delighted.”

“Are they sitting in, too?”

“Maybe.” 

“Okay.” 

They drove to his parents. And went inside. His parents met them at the door. They hugged her and welcomed her in just like she had never left.

“Come on in, kids. It’s lovely to have you here. We heard you were back in town. And we remained hopeful you two would make a connection. It isn’t a surprise to us,” his parents said. 

 “What do you mean? He’s married to someone else, and they have a child together?” she said to his parents. 

“Yes, but it is a difficult marriage. She is a chameleon and abrasive,” his mother said.

“She’s removed our son from our family,” his father said.  

“Why?” 

“Her drinking has accelerated his drinking, and we don’t know either of them anymore,” his mother said.  

“Sad, but true,” his father said. 

“I wanted the marriage to work because I thought I had to make it work. But when I saw you again, I knew I didn’t want it to work anymore. My feelings for you outweighed my desire for the marriage to work. I don't understand why I even thought I loved her.” 

“Maybe because she was there, listened, and would do anything to keep you. She told everyone what she would do to you, and we on the baseball team all know about your sex life.” 

“You must be joking. She would never. I asked her never to do that.” 

“Well, do you want me to elaborate in front of your parents?” 

“No, no, thank you.”

“Fine. You know I would never. Because when we broke up, I didn’t tell anyone a single thing about you. Unlike you. I heard it all. From various people all over town. But I forgave you because I realized you were hurting.”

“Yeah, I was. But now I want to make amends. I want to have you back.”

“And I will be yours if that’s what you want, but you must leave the booze behind for the long haul.” 

“For good?”

“Yeah, and we’ll concentrate on our health and getting fit. Can you do that?” 

“I can, and I want to.” 

“Excellent. Then let’s do it. And have some babies of our own.”

“Yeah, let’s get started tonight. Mom, Dad, excuse us.” 

“Fine, but remember to end the other relationship first. Properly.” 

“He will.”

“Do you want to leave now?” 

“No, we’re going to my old bedroom.” 

“Okay.” 

“Good night, Mom and Dad.”

“Good night, Mom and Dad.”

“Good night, kids. We’re glad you’re back.” 

“Nobody tells about this night.” 

“Agreed.” 

“Agreed.” 

“Give me your keys. I’ll move your car around the corner.” 

“Okay.” She handed his dad her car keys, and he put her car inside their garage instead.

She awoke at dawn and went home.

His wife arrived shortly after 6:30 am. They missed each other by minutes. He sat in the rocking chair at his parents’ and watched his wife drive in with the two kids. 

“Where have you been all night?”

“You’re looking at it.” 

“Why?”

“I want a divorce.” 

“What? Are you joking?”

“No, I want a divorce. The house will sell, and I’ve figured out your share and mine. And Brad will be on a week on, a week off. Or you give me full custody.” 

“Over my dead body.” 

“Well, we’ll see about that, if I were you. I’d go home and start packing your shit.” 

“What? What has happened to you?”

“Nothing. I want a divorce, is all. I’m moving back home.” 

“Okay, if that is what you want.” She left Brad with him, took Peter with her and returned to their house. She packed her stuff. She knew she would never compete with him if he got a divorce lawyer. She agreed to sign the divorce papers he drew up the following week. Once they were signed, they put up a for-sale sign on the house. He paid her out before that. All the proceeds from the house went directly to him. 

Then he went to see his ex. She hadn’t heard from him in two weeks, but his parents had called her many times to fill her in on what was happening. She had money, too. She had recently purchased a home in Colchester and was renting it out. There was no problem, since the renter was paying the mortgage and taxes. 

They pooled their money for six months and then built a beautiful monster home. The home they always talked about. She was fat with a baby, and they had not married yet. They didn’t care. They were in love. They were healthy, happy, and fitness freaks. The day she gave birth, they had names picked for both sexes. When they saw the baby, they threw all those names out and came up with an original. 

Thereafter, they had a small wedding on a pirate island getaway with a limited number of friends and family. The happiest day of their lives. They looked and exuded happiness. They never saw his ex-wife again until years later at their son’s wedding. He invited her because he felt obligated to. She showed up as the biggest blimp, with a bulbous nose and a fat man who drank just as much. Before the reception was over, her son asked her to leave. She embarrassed him by being so drunk. 

Her ex-husband and his wife laughed as they danced and watched her being escorted out. Before she got to the door, she turned and shouted, “You told me you hated her. But there’s a thin line between love and hate. I guess you tripped over it. And left me behind. You bastard. And you, you bitch. You ruined my life. And our marriage. I hope you’re content.” 

The married couple turned and danced the night away, never discussing what she said or her again.  

Brad, their son, heard what his mother had said and understood what had taken place all those years ago. 

“Dad, is this story true?” 

“Yes, son. It’s true. I left your mother to marry your stepmother. But your stepmother saved my life from drinking and ruining your life and mine.”

“Is that what you think? Or did Mom drink because you left her for my stepmom?” 

“That’s not the case. Ask your grandparents or aunts and uncles about your mother’s behaviour before I divorced her.” 

“What?” 

“She had a problem with drinking. She stopped when she carried you but began again while she nursed you. Until your stepmom came along, I thought what your Mom did was okay. Your stepmom showed me it wasn’t okay and saved my life by stopping me from drinking. And ultimately, she saved your life from growing up in a childhood of drinking. Something she knew well.” 

“I know; she told me about Grandpa.” 

“Well, you can hardly blame us for your mother’s drinking. She drank before I met her; I just didn’t recognize the alcoholic signs in her. Your stepmom did.” 

 “But I wanted your stepmom before that. I’ve loved her forever, and I never stopped, and when she returned from living out west, she captivated my heart again, more so than ever and I was mesmerized by her. Once we made love, there was no going back.”

“Dad, I doubt that’s love. I think that’s a disaster for everyone.” 

“How so?”

“First, you made Mom believe you loved her. Even though you didn’t.” 

“I didn’t know that at the time. So that’s hardly fair.” 

“Second, you broke up after you made love to someone else. How could she compete with that?” 

“That’s not ideal; I agree. But that’s life. Sometimes things happen when you’re an adult that you don’t plan for. And that was one of those times.” 

 “Third, you divorced her knowing she wouldn’t make near enough money to fight you in court for custody or anything.” 

“And you want to know who made sure we treated her fairly? Your stepmom. That’s who. She had been through a divorce with an idiot husband and wanted to be more than fair to your mother, but your mother wanted nothing to do with you. Not us telling her she couldn’t have anything to do with you or take you on her weekends or times.“

“What?”

“Yes, and she made sure your mother was invited to every event that concerned you because your stepmom made it happen. Your mother never—"

“Honey, that’s enough. You know it's best to leave some things unsaid."

"You're so right, babe, my lips are sealed."