Waiting in the Rain for a Boy

As soon as the first droplet of rain hit her face, she realized how ridiculous she was being. Waiting in the rain for a boy? That wasn't like her. In fact, it was something she'd sworn never to do–is it really any different now that the boy in question might be her father?

"Honey, maybe we should go home," her mother said softly. The older woman was holding an umbrella–she always came prepared, after all–but Chrissy was standing just far enough away from her to be hit by the oncoming storm.

When Chrissy didn't respond, her mother tried to close that distance once more… but Chrissy had always liked her space. She turned and started walking through the park, towards where they'd parked their car.

"Oh, honey," her mother said, voice dripping with sympathy, but Chrissy didn't care. She put her hands in the pockets of her hoodie. She was probably always going to end up here, right? It was her own fault for trusting the man who first left her and her mother so many years ago.

"Oh well," Chrissy said simply, determined not to let this affect her. She had finals coming up. Her best friend's birthday was in a week, and she was in charge of the party. She needed to finish her latest painting. She had so much going on, and not nearly enough time to be wasting any of it on something as pointless as a deadbeat dad.

"I'm sure he has his reasons," her mother said, hurrying after her.

"Yeah, probably," Chrissy replied.

"Maybe he'll text you."

"Hope not."

"Christine…"

Chrissy started to correct her, but then bit her tongue. It was no use. Her mother had been calling her Christine all her life. She wasn't going to start calling her Chrissy now, just like Chrissy's father wasn't going to suddenly start showing up and Chrissy herself wasn't going to suddenly start grieving the lack of him.

"Can we just go?" she asked, trying not to sound as irritated as she truly felt. She just wanted to go home.

"Of course, dear."

The drive home wasn't silent, because the rain was far too loud. Chrissy always hated driving in the rain, but now she found her thoughts drifting elsewhere, her usual anxiety melting away before the unexpected heat of her anger. How dare he stand her up in an unfamiliar place? How dare he find her number, after all these years, and ask to meet her only to leave her standing in the rain with nothing to show for it?

How dare he make her hope?

Even once the rain stopped–prematurely, Chrissy thought–the car ride was quiet. She could tell her mother was itching to say something, or to turn on the radio, maybe. But she was walking on thin ice around her daughter, and Chrissy was sure she knew it.

Her mother tried very hard to connect with her that night, once they arrived home. And yet, try as she might, she still couldn't quite bridge the gap that had been growing between them since Chrissy entered high school. Something had changed, then, and maybe it was Chrissy or maybe it was her mother or maybe it was both of them or just the world in general, but… Things weren't as easy as they used to be. Suddenly Chrissy didn't want to be around her mother in private, let alone in public, and she knew her mother was hurt by her embarrassment. On good days, Chrissy felt bad about that, sympathizing with the loss of their formerly close relationship. On bad days, she just couldn't bring herself to care.

When morning came, Chrissy found herself dreading that it was a Saturday. This was supposed to be her two-day break from the stress of studying for finals, and yet now she had something entirely new to stress about. What was she going to do all weekend? Think? The night before, she'd been positive she had more than enough going on in her life to fulfill her, but now…

Her phone buzzed, and she took a deep breath, closing her eyes. It was probably Elaine, wanting to talk about Tanya's party. Chrissy really should answer.

It wasn't until it buzzed a second time that Chrissy finally opened her eyes and picked up the phone, though. And to her displeasure, the messages weren't from Elaine, or even from Tanya; they were from an unknown number.

Although 'unknown' was quite the strong word. Chrissy knew exactly who it was. She just didn't want to add him into her contacts yet, not until… Well, not until he'd proven he was serious about re-entering her life. And now, she knew he wasn't.

She heavily considered just blocking him right then and there, but curiosity won out over her fading anger. She could never stay angry for long. It always drifted into sadness, and in this case, that was working in her father's favor.

Sorry I couldn't make it last night, the first text read.

Sent a few minutes later, the second continued with, Something came up.

Something came up? Chrissy's nostrils flared as she stared at the cracked phone screen. What could have possibly come up that trumped her, his long-abandoned daughter? Her anger had returned in full force, and it only fueled her curiosity further with its bitterness.

What? she texted back.

What do you mean? he replied after a few seconds.

What came up? she texted. She did not use her usual slew of emojis, and she used perfect punctuation. She hoped the tone would hurt him as much as it would usually hurt her.

A work thing, he replied. How about we meet up tomorrow morning for breakfast?

Chrissy's chest felt tight even as it heaved with her unsteady breaths. Here he goes again. How dare he? She thought about telling her mother, but she wasn't sure whether the woman would take his side or hers, and she wasn't even sure which she wanted.

In the end, she left him on 'read.'

Served him right.