Look What the Cat Dragged In

Tuesday, December 25, 2010

"Christie if you wanted to make this all about you then, congratulations because look what you've done." Mom spats with something between a sob and just blubbering. For context, we are all sitting around the dinner table at our annual family Christmas dinner with the extended family, most people are mid-bite because of my mom's noises or because of my recent declaration. Three minutes earlier, I had just come out to my extended family as being bisexual. I had told my siblings a few months ago, but I had told Nana first, who was surprisingly accepting of my news; she even said that she was glad I could live my life how I wanted. In fact, she was the one who had encouraged me to tell the family, which, was not going well. It was the sharing and life update portion of the meal, and I was just following suit. My cousin had just announced they had found a surrogate and were expecting in the new year, my sister announced that she had been accepted into law school. So why was my news so horrific? I'll let my mother tell you- "If you are a bisexual, that means you will never get married and not give us any grandchildren!" What is it with parents and obsessing over your sex life if it could yield grandchildren? I don't really have a response but just get up from the table leaving the dining room and walking out the front door.

Sunday, December 24, 2023

"Babe are you sure want to go and visit my family? We can go visit your parents in DC. No point in putting in all that work for an uncomfortable Christmas." I call down the hallway as I finish packing our suitcase. "Christie, honey I know you have been avoiding going home since that one Christmas, and I know we had an "excuse" with Noah - who is currently cooing and sitting on her hip, but your brother did say this could be Nana's last Christmas and I would hate for you to miss that- you could never forgive yourself." "Sonia, have you been talking to Marco? How long have you two been talking?" I stare at her dumbfoundedly while Noah makes grabby hands at me, I take him silently. "She has been chatting with him since March" Andrew says as he comes through the doorway with two coffee cups and passes one to Sonia. A little bit of an life update.

I left home and stayed with my friends in Viriginia but after a few months I summoned the courage and applied for a Psychiatry degree at George Mason, that was where I met Sonia. She was persuing an Econ/ Statistics degree and now works as a CFO. We dated for a few years but realized that we were missing something more, and that's when we opened our relationship and met Andrew. He was a friend of one of my coworkers and we all met for drinks and hit it off. We had been living as "uncommon laws" as Sonia likes to put it ever since. Then in 2022 Noah was born. We had decided that we had wanted a family but weren't sure the way to go about it. We didn't want to use a surrogate and since I was doing my PhD at the time, Sonia agreed to carry him. I am beyond proud of the life that we have carved out for ourselves. And those who matter to us, are happy for us.

I can't be mad at her, I had been meaning to reach out to the family but it felt strained. My sister had also made mention about Nana when we had last spoke. A small part of me has been pre-emptively bracing for what mom will say. Andrew has so kindly volunteered to go and visit his family on the West Coast. I am not ashamed of him, it is just one surprise at a time, you know. "Alright Weston crew let's head to the airport! give Dada some kisses to hold him over the holidays Andrew croons, taking Noah and giving me his coffee mug. Sonia comes up behind me and sneaks a kiss on my cheek- "we got this."

Three hours later we are standing in the foyer of my parents house. Mom is out getting the last few things she'll need for dinner but my dad and siblings welcome Sonia in with open arms. "Are you going to go and see Nana?" my dad asks as my siblings chat wih Sonia and play with Noah. "Yeah I think I will". I drive up the road a few minutes to a house I call my second home. Nana's not an invalid but her health issues have slowed her down a bit. I walk up to the door that I already know is unlocked and let myself in. "Well look what the cat dragged in. Welcome home baby" I hear her sweet laugh, I slump down to give her a hug and sink onto the couch. We snuggle close as I tell her bonus details about my job and flip through photos of Andrew,Sonia and Noah, who I promised would visit later. "I am proud of you pumpkin, and I am sorry about how your mother reacted. I am just glad you have a new beginning." She says while bringing me a cup of coffee. "One of many, I say as I grab my purse and pull out an ultrasound. Sonia and Andrew know that I am pregnant, but I wanted her to be the first of my family to know. She smiles giddily so excited to be a great grandnana again. "That's not all, I smirk- it's twins." That part Andrew and Sonia are not aware of, I had just found out last week myself. I am once again bombarded in Nana's tight hug. "How far along are you?" she asks between happy gasps of tears. "I am ten weeks." I say, my smile spreading across my cheeks. "I think Noah will be excited." "I am sure he will be." she says. "Let me get you some tea instead of coffee. Would you like some of my banana bread too?" she says as she saunters towards the kitchen. My answer is a resounding "absolutely".

Fifteen minutes later Nana and I are back sitting on the couch. Nana is resting her hand over top of my belly gently. I reach down and put my hand over top of hers. We sit their in bliss and silence. "Thank you Nana, for being there." my voice is quiet. "My dear I am honoured that you would trust me to tell me."